On balancing prose and exposition
- Thread starter Averon 2011
- Start date
Well, my first thought would be to brainstorm to perhaps come up with a way to make the medical information both more understandable and more interesting. Just conveying information because it's needed can be dry, but if it's combined with action and/or forcing the MC to make some kind of decision (hence, tension), then it becomes more of an integral part of the story.
I would try to stay away from having some extra character in place just to explain the medical stuff to the MC. That can feel awkward, and sometimes can be annoying. I would really try to think what a character might do in the situation in real life. For example only, if the MC is brainy, he might go here and there researching the medical questions he has. If the MC is bold, he might find some old doctor who can explain things to him. Again, just rough examples.
I would try to stay away from having some extra character in place just to explain the medical stuff to the MC. That can feel awkward, and sometimes can be annoying. I would really try to think what a character might do in the situation in real life. For example only, if the MC is brainy, he might go here and there researching the medical questions he has. If the MC is bold, he might find some old doctor who can explain things to him. Again, just rough examples.
I agree with the Catman.
How do the kids discover the medical details? That's very important, and makes all the difference between boring and fun. Do they break in and steal medical records (with good reason, of course, and not just that they're criminals). Do they spy/eavesdrop on the adults?
Consider Harry Potter, for example. Even though Hermione reads a lot and is very intelligent, getting information is never boring. The kids sneak out under the invisibility cloak. They break into the restricted section of the library. They use polyjuice potion to spy on people. They seek out monsters with information (like the giant spider.
). Etc.
Good luck.
How do the kids discover the medical details? That's very important, and makes all the difference between boring and fun. Do they break in and steal medical records (with good reason, of course, and not just that they're criminals). Do they spy/eavesdrop on the adults?
Consider Harry Potter, for example. Even though Hermione reads a lot and is very intelligent, getting information is never boring. The kids sneak out under the invisibility cloak. They break into the restricted section of the library. They use polyjuice potion to spy on people. They seek out monsters with information (like the giant spider.
). Etc. Good luck.
The Prometheus Project: Trapped is very good about providing a lot of scientific information without becoming boring. All the information is uncovered through exciting exploration or brought up because it relates to a difficult decision, and there's never too much at one time. You might want to read it, if you haven't done so already. There are sequels, too, but I haven't read those yet.
Yeah, I second what everyone else has said. Check out the Magic Schoolbus books as well. There is no narrator telling the reader scientifical stuff. It's all told through dialogue between the kids--including hilarious misunderstandings that the other kids correct and explain. Hugely popular series because the books are never pedantic.
Magic Treehouse books also include a lot of science facts integrated into very simple stories. Sounds like your book is for more advanced readers, but the technique is the same.
Another thing to think about is to only include the science info once you've established a need for it. If the character needs to understand air pressure in order to keep from being suffocated, it's a little more interesting to learn about.
Magic Treehouse books also include a lot of science facts integrated into very simple stories. Sounds like your book is for more advanced readers, but the technique is the same.
Another thing to think about is to only include the science info once you've established a need for it. If the character needs to understand air pressure in order to keep from being suffocated, it's a little more interesting to learn about.
So, the main character is an adult? And all the kids are asleep the whole time? That does not sound like a children's book.
Children's books are generally about kids. And if a story's not about kids, it has to be very kid-relatable. Being in a life-threatening coma isn't really something most kids can relate to - but being worried about a sick relative is. Could Dad be in a coma instead?
Is this YA or MG? For MG, I'd be a little careful (but hard to say how without knowing your full story). Medical doctors spend years thinking they have all kinds of illnesses after reading text books, and the same is true for little kids. If MG, you don't want to frighten them so much that they miss the details.
Still not convinced this is going to work. In MG, the kids save the day. Period.
Dad can help. Dad can be the expert they consult with. Dad and one kid can work together to save everybody else. But if all your kids are in comas, and only Dad is conscious and able to cure them.... Then we have a problem.
You weren't the sole reason Judy changed her name. People have mistaken her for a guy for years.
We have a section at AW solely for finding beta readers, so you could post a request there. However, I've found the best way to find good betas and critique partners is to hang out in SYW and get to know people. Either way, good luck to you!
We have a section at AW solely for finding beta readers, so you could post a request there. However, I've found the best way to find good betas and critique partners is to hang out in SYW and get to know people. Either way, good luck to you!
Not offended at all. It's my own fault completely. When I signed up for AW, I had no idea how much fun I'd have here, so I didn't think about my username. Just picked one I was already using on Pogo games...
And I agree with Smish. Start in SYW. Develop relationships. Post a chapter or two of your book, and crit everybody else who posts. Then when you start looking for a beta, people who are interested can look you up and get an idea of who you are. If you've already proven that you can listen to criticism and learn from it, they'll be more willing to donate their time to you.
And I agree with Smish. Start in SYW. Develop relationships. Post a chapter or two of your book, and crit everybody else who posts. Then when you start looking for a beta, people who are interested can look you up and get an idea of who you are. If you've already proven that you can listen to criticism and learn from it, they'll be more willing to donate their time to you.
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Thread Jack. I just loved reading this put so simply and directly. It mirrored a conversation I had today but you said it better.