What makes romance in YA work?

For me, a romance works if the love interest has a whole, complete personality, with their own life and interests outside of the MC. Sounds obvious enough, but I can think of some books that fail at that.

I agree about not liking "soulmates," in that if the only reason the author wants me to root for the couple is that they're somehow destined for each other, I'm not going to buy it. The romance needs to be built off of something - a way that their personalities click together that makes them compatible.

Though I don't mind the "misunderstanding" type of plot device, as long as it's in keeping with the characters.

Funnily enough, the male POV is actually the POV I've tended to gravitate towards so far in my writing, and I'm a girl.

Chemistry is an important factor. If your characters don't trulh connect with each other and just like each other based on how hot the other person looks, then it just won't work. Also I like realistic romances, you know, ones that take work. I believe that love at first sight is for fairytales so make the characters work for that first kiss, don't just hand it to them on a silver platter. Let your characters argue, let them get angry at each other, let phone numberd be deleted and just...make it real.

As for books: Anything by John Green esp. Paper Towns and though I haven't read it yet try Invincible Summer by Hannah Moskowitz.

Different readers (and writers) will all like different things. Now that's I've pointed out the obvious answer, let me say that I'm not a romance kind of girl. It's not really something I seek out or intentionally put into my stories. But I do like romances that add a nice spice to the story without overpowering the whole thing.

What I really like are antagonistic romances where the two involved are so alike and so hard headed that they're just as likely to choke each other as kiss. See the early seasons of Farscape (still my favorite fictional romance of all time) or the little bit of romance in Unwind between Risa and Connor (though that kind of fell to the wayside to the point it becomes a sub-subplot).

I'm right there with everyone else on the "soulmates" thing. I'm also not a big fan of the love-at-first-sight trope. Attraction? Sure. Obsession of the "OMG I love you and would die without you oh carry me to class and if you leave I'll throw myself off the cliff" variety? I'll probably end up throwing the book across the room.

Ultimately, I think as long as the romance isn't shallow (or a plot tumor in a book where the romance isn't the main conflict) will work for most readers. Treat it like a character and show the good with the bad. Make it believable and worth rooting for.

1. Both characters each have something going on besides dating/pursuing the other person
2. There's a good obstacle keeping them apart (but not "he's hella dangerous and might maim her")
3. As a couple, each one fulfills or fixes some need or lack or defect or personal problem that the other one has. Good relationships make both people better individuals (otherwise one side is just giving and not getting anything back).
4. Each person is at least sympathetic enough that I can root for them to get together. I don't really like when the LI is a super-douche for most of the book, because it's hard to relate to either the MC or the LI in that case (like She's So Money, Paper Towns, Sprout, or The DUFF--I enjoyed all these books for other reasons, but the Douchey Love Interest is very unappealing to me)

I agree with Kitty Pryde's list (especially Douchey LIs. Yuckers.)

Personally, I prefer romance as a really good seasoning or even up to a side dish for the book, but never the actual entrée. There needs to be something else going on in the story. When will-they-won't-they tension is all the story rides on, it becomes stale, especially if they get together in the middle of the story. Well, then what? The only option seems to be tearing them apart again, and that can get predictable/contrived.

This might seem strange, but I tend to like romance when it's put in at the end as a sort of reward. "We've been through all this stuff together, let's kiss." When the characters' relationship is so natural after being built for the whole book, that it makes perfect sense that they would get together. Things like that just make me nod and smile. Romance doesn't have to be hinted at constantly. It can be as organic as it is in life.

OMG YES TO THE FARSCAPE MENTION. Even though upon rewatch their romance did speed up from I hate you to love quickly, even if they were the epitome of starcrossed. I love Farscape, best show ever, love love love, etc.

Anyway, I am putting yet another voice towards the anti-instalove camp. I hate when characters in YA just randomly see one another and fall in love, or else they were together in past lives and their love is eternal, soulmates, so on and so forth. I gag when this happens. It's not realistic, especially when you add in the abuse trope. Just a note, but relationships bordering on domestic abuse in YA being promoted as eternal and forever and destiny are my least favorite thing about YA. Period. In my opinion, it's not healthy to say these are acceptable and good things to young girls.

But what makes a relationship work in YA?
1.) Believability. Yes, there are girls who go gaga over boys, and boys who are driven by their lower regions, but obsessive love is creepy and should be portrayed as such.
2.) The relationship is not the forefront of the plot, but instead just adds something to the plot.
3.) Likability of characters, chemistry, etc.
4.) And if your romance is clearly not a good one, either make this a plot point or rethink it.

Elysium said:

Chemistry is an important factor. If your characters don't trulh connect with each other and just like each other based on how hot the other person looks, then it just won't work. Also I like realistic romances, you know, ones that take work. I believe that love at first sight is for fairytales so make the characters work for that first kiss, don't just hand it to them on a silver platter. Let your characters argue, let them get angry at each other, let phone numberd be deleted and just...make it real.

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Good point! I personally like those love/hate relationships with characters, that's a part of the romance factor in my work.

The two characters in my ms (dual pov) were once together but have broken up and the journey is long, with one hating the other until some emotional events get them on the track of being friends, at least. "Romance" is ideal and it definitely has undertones in YA, so I make it as real as possible and as relevant as possible. Everything's physical with young people, but I try to go beyond the physical sometimes when it comes to romance. It is about chemistry, interests, being in sync, realizing your faults and letting another person in.

Rule #1 in Writing Romance: If there isn't a reason why the hero/heroine likes the love interest, other than "OMGZ, they're SOOOO HOTTTT!" than they probably shouldn't be together.

SHOW it, don't say it. I think this applies to everything in writing, but especially in romance. Don't SAY they're attracted to each other. Don't SAY that they love each other. Show it. So many YA fall short of this.

And I agree with everyone. Let it be real. Don't let it be perfect. Let them fight, curse, and slam doors, and let them make mistakes. Let them do whatever it takes to make it right again. Let them break each others' hearts and learn how to fix them. Just, you know, make me BELIEVE in them.

P.S. Also, fluff is like sugar. A little bit sprinkled on top is tasty, but when fluff starts to cover plot by the spoonfuls, it might be time to go on a diet. Hopefully, you all understood my little metaphor.

Love is for fools, show it.

It is all about risk taking.

I'm in the prcess of adding some love interest to my novel becuase my daughter says it needs some. I guess it is the garnish or salt and pepper they talk about.

oh God do not read IS for romance unless you want to see people who are absolutely horrible for each other making each other's lives more horrible. It is the opposite of a romance.

You could read Gone, Gone, Gone if you have galleygrab access! that's a romance. but who knows if i'm good at it. so. babbling.

Faith and Heresy said:

And I agree with everyone. Let it be real. Don't let it be perfect. Let them fight, curse, and slam doors, and let them make mistakes. Let them do whatever it takes to make it right again. Let them break each others' hearts and learn how to fix them. Just, you know, make me BELIEVE in them.

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I took this one a little too much to heart in my first draft. My couple was always either being gross and in love or arguing about something. And since the romance is a subplot, the arguments and predictable make ups started to bog it down.

So I agree about going easy on it so as not to slip into melodrama

I think there are two things that need to be said.

1. Writing love is not easy. This applies whether we are writing an adult romance or a YA romance. People reading a romance are looking to hear a story of love. Some want it realistic, some want it fantastical and larger then life. But all want to believe in and cheer for the characters of the tale.

2. Do we have a different set of moral responsibilities when writing for the YA market? The way I am hearing people speak here suggests this is so. We go from telling our children about Cinderella, or Snow White, or The Little Mermaid when our girls are children, to suddenly wanting to repress the mythic aspect of romance in favor of focusing strictly on what's real.

The problem with the above is that romance, in and of itself, is not actually real. It is an idealized state of being, the embodiment of love, lust, hope, dreams and God(s) know what else. It's a step away from the ordinary that has somehow managed to peek out from behind the curtain. How many people, regardless of their age, actually think logically and romantically at the same time?

Which brings us to an ultimate question: is the purpose and premise of YA romance suppose to be different then adult romance?

I'm sincerely not trying to be a jerk here. An example of what I am saying:

In my book my heroine, Sarena, has only known her love interest Kesyl two weeks by the time that the story draws to a close. (I'm not counting the time she met part of his spirit when traveling to the Underworld. Long story there.) In an adult romance ensuring that the two of them expressed love toward each other by the end would be a given, and as a writer it would be my responsibility to convince readers that this made sense.

In a YA romance does this change? Is my responsibility to either prove the fallacy of what they are saying if they do say it, or make certain that they don't say it since it is illogical and false to real life? Even though the entire premise of my book -- a portal opening during Y2K and a different race coming through -- is completely unreal as well?

Both answers are dangerous in my opinion. If I do have them say they love each other at the end of two weeks (mind you they go through hell, but that's beside the point.) I run the risk of people going "Yeah, right. That never happens and never ends well when it does." On the other hand, by not having them say this to each other if their actions justify it and it's what they feel and want to say, then I am suggesting that emotional connections made during the teenage experience are lesser, illogical and unworthy of expression and action because they likely won't last. (Even though I can argue that they can -- my parents are a good example. Fiction doesn't work that way.)

There is a lot more I could say on this subject, but this is getting long.

This is an interesting point. I think it's a tad different in YA precisely because it comes after the idealized versions we see in disney movies.

Disney princess stories tell us, "hey love, is like this," when it isn't. So I think it's good for YA to represent both that idealized version and something more realistic because of lot of these young people haven't experienced love yet.

Most adults have at some point, and so they read romantic stories while knowing the reality of things.

It reminds me of the oscar wilde quote from the preface of Dorian Gray: "The nineteenth century dislike of Realism is the rage of Caliban seeing his own face in a glass. The nineteenth century dislike of Romanticism is the rage of Caliban not seeing his own face in a glass."

I get really sick of boy gets girl/boy loses girl/boy gets girl back. Even in a romance, I like for the conflict that comes after they get together to not lead to a break up. I hate when I'm a hundred pages from the end and the couple gets together and I'm like awesome, they're going to get twenty pages together and then break up until the last two. Give me more than twenty-two pages of them together.

Romance is like comedy -- you should never "try" to do it, because in trying you make the mechanics so obvious as to surely fail. It either works or it doesn't.

The best romance in any book for me is when there is real tension and the whole will they or won't they get together. Or if they do get together rather quickly, something breaks them up and it's the crazy tension of will they get back together. I don't know any from a boy's pov that does this really well. I guess other's can point those out, but Going too Far by Jennifer Echols and Anna and the French Kiss were both really great books w/fantastic romantic tension. And my favorite of all time is The Mortal Instruments. That books seems to be a hit and miss for a lot of people, especially the reason for the characters not being able to come together but it never bothered me.

To be honest, I get bored if relationships are same old, same old. Sixteen-year-old boy, sixteen-year-old girl, middle class, suburbia... I find romances the most compelling when there's something different about the couple. Boy/boy and girl/girl romances are my favourite, and I especially love romances between transgender characters. Romances with an age difference, even if it's just a couple of years. Romances with a class or economic difference, too.

I don't know, but my favourite kinds of relationships are ones that we haven't seen a million times before. I want to read about characters that have something a little bit different going on, some fresh dynamics.

I forgot to add last time that I, too, am a huge fan of Farscape. My schnoodle's name is D'Argo.

Anyway, I can certainly see what you are saying. From the sound of things I was concerned that we had a pattern of people feeling that only purely realistic things should be explored in YA. To me that does not make sense.

I wanted to go after a couple things I didn't in my last post.

First up: "Destiny". I realize that to some people it is total cheese. To me it ties into fairy tale or mythological traditions. I certainly wouldn't want every book to work this way. And just because the author comes up for a reason that a couple is destined, that is no excuse to skimp on characterization or the all important "Why are these characters together?" I want to cheer for them -- not weep that they've been sentenced to something worse then life in prison without committing a crime.

I also like for there two be two plots going on in a romance book, generally. The romance plot and then another plot. (I suppose that one of these is technically a subplot.) A pure romance would bore me. A book without romance will bore me, too. (I like love stories, darn it! )

I'm relieved no one got confused by the "romance isn't real" statement that I made. I feel that romance, both between couples in real life and as a genre of fiction is very real and important. What I meant (just in case anyone did misunderstand...) is that in entering Romance we step away from reality / the every day to a certain degree. (That degree varies from couple to couple in life and from reader to reader for fiction.)

I notice that no one took a stab at my problem for Sarena and Kesyl. I'm *hoping* to write a series -- so they will have time to say "I love you" after several more weeks / months. However, I know that as a new writer, with nothing to back me, I really cannot dare to dream that will happen -- I need to make sure my book stands alone. Should I have them say "I love you"? Should I leave it up to them?

Anyway, this thread is fascinating.

Katallina said:

I notice that no one took a stab at my problem for Sarena and Kesyl. I'm *hoping* to write a series -- so they will have time to say "I love you" after several more weeks / months. However, I know that as a new writer, with nothing to back me, I really cannot dare to dream that will happen -- I need to make sure my book stands alone. Should I have them say "I love you"? Should I leave it up to them?

Anyway, this thread is fascinating.

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Regarding your problem, I think it comes down to the question: "Does it come naturally?" If it sounds contrived, they probably shouldn't tell each other I love you. Sometimes, it can be hard for the author to tell whether it sounds forced or natural, but don't worry: that's why we all have critique partners and such. You can find lots of help here on this forum!

Also, the "I love you" doesn't have to be a big deal. If I were you, I'd be more worried about SHOWING them in love than whether they should say so or not. And lastly, don't beat yourself up over the whole 'they've only known each other for a few weeks'-thing. In the book The Historian, the main characters parents marry each other after twenty-six days, but it comes very naturally!

It's not about the ammount of time: it's HOW you use that time!

I agree with pretty much everyone here. I for one am not really a fan of the Designated Love Interest - so often it is done wrong! Just like with plot-twists I think romance should be surprising but inevitable.

One tip I could give you is: look at your story. Who does you MC actually have the best chemistry with? If it's his/her best friend and not the DLI, maybe you should think about switching things up.

And as always, I'm speaking in general terms. Of course there are exceptions!

Oh, and another thing: glorifying unhealthy relationships, anyone? Lately, this had been done so much in YA that I actually get scared!