Mini Slugs

[Rainy Night]

What are the rules about using mini slugs?

I'm not real familiar with them, but seem to be seeing them more frequently.

[nganok]

What are the rules about using mini slugs?

I'm not real familiar with them, but seem to be seeing them more frequently.

i'M SEEING THEM MORE AND MORE TOO. i LIKE THEm AND USE THEM -woops caps sorry---anyway. I studied Frank Darabount ( Greenmile & Shawshank) he uses them masterfully. Now I always use them. Maybe one of the other guys can help you with the technical aspect, I hate to quote rules I'm not 100% about.

[dpaterso]

As always, as long as it's crystal clear, do it any way you like, e.g.

EXT. BRADLEY'S HOUSE - NIGHT

A McMansion in the suburbs. Lights are on downstairs.

An SUV pulls into the driveway. Engine and lights are switched off.

ENTRANCE HALL

Bradley enters.

BRADLEY
Hey honey, I'm home!

No answer, he goes into

LIVING ROOM

Nobody's there. The TV is on, showing a soap. Sound muted.

KITCHEN

Bradley enters. Nobody here either.

BRADLEY
Hey Nora? It's me.

Silence.

STAIRS

Bradley goes upstairs, getting a funny feeling now.

BEDROOM

Bradley enters -- freezes.

Nora's on her knees on the floor, tied up and gagged. A MASKED GUNMAN stands behind her, his gun at her head.

Bradley swallows hard.

etc.

Another use for minislugs might be,

BRADLEY

slowly moves his hand behind his back.

HIS GUN is stuck into his waistband.

THE MASKED GUNMAN

thumbs back the hammer.

MASKED GUNMAN
Go ahead. You shoot me, she dies.

NORA

pleads with her eyes, help me!

BRADLEY

angrily bares his teeth. He lets his hand fall to his side.

MASKED GUNMAN
Wise decision.

etc. Although that's probably directing.

-Derek
My wittle web page - hack stories, failed novels, dud screenplays, terminal writer's block. (http://hometown.aol.co.uk/DPaterson57)
Another one of them new worlds. No beer, no women, no pool parlors, nothin'. Nothin' to do but throw rocks at tin cans, and we gotta bring our own tin cans.

[Optimus]

(Just saw Derek's post. He must've posted while I was writing mine, so I'll just add to what he said.)

There are no set "rules" to using minislugs.

Having said that, there are "right" and "wrong" ways to use them. Of course, these ways are arguable and based on opinion, but there is a definite "I know it when I see it" quality with which people judge a minislug to be "correctly" or "incorrectly" used.

I use minislugs to denote camera shots (and sometimes sounds...but very rarely) without having to write camera shots, and also to denote location when different parts of a scene take place in different parts of the same location (such as Derek's example of going from room to room in a continuous shot).

Here's an example from Dave Steinberg's script, "Slackers" (not a great script, by the way. However, Dave does use minislugs quite masterfully). I'll bold the mini so you can see how he uses it. Forgive the formatting as I'm cutting and pasting:

"INT. LECTURE HALL - DAY

The Midterm exam. The huge lecture hall is filled with about 200 COLLEGE STUDENTS and a few TEACHING ASSISTANTS. The T.A.'s are working their way up the center aisle passing out the exams and blue books row by row. The smug HEAD T.A. stands at the front of the room.

HEAD T.A.
The midterm is worth forty percent
of your grade, but those of you
with a working knowledge of the
Franco-Prussian War shouldn't be
too concerned.

In the aisle seat in the

VERY LAST ROW,

DAVE GUTTENMACHER is flirting across the aisle with a CUTE GIRL who seems to be enjoying Dave's attention. Then, interrupting the magic, a SNOTTY T.A. arrives at his row and hands Dave a stack of exams and blue books."

I see crap in newbie scripts (and, I'm still a newbie, too!) all the time where the aspirant screenwriter will put gratuitous camera directions in the script. "CLOSE ON," "ZOOM IN," "JACK's POV," etc.

Honestly, if you know how to use minislugs properly, YOU'LL NEVER NEED TO WRITE CAMERA DIRECTIONS.

Now, of course there is no "rule" saying that you should "never" use camera directions, but they can pull the reader out of the story. And, if you've written an incredibly engaging story, would you want the flow and pacing be ruined for the reader by him/her busting his/her mental shins on camera directions?

Anyway, despite the "do" versus "don't" debate regarding camera directions, leaving them out and using minislugs instead makes the read much smoother, cleaner, tighter, and makes the pacing flow more naturally.

Use it for any type of camera direction. They're not OVERT directions; you're creating a "mental camera shot" in the reader's head, without being obvious about it. If you do it effectively, they'll never notice and they'll see in their head the shot you want them to see, without realizing that you just gave them a camera shot.

Here are two more examples of what I mean:

"Jack and Jill sit a foot apart on the couch. Jack's sheet white, sweating through his collar, hands folded tightly in his lap. His eyes dart toward Jill, then the floor.

Jill notices and grins. She coyly, yet subtlely, scoots closer to him. Jack GULPS.

Closer. Little by little, inch by inch, she manuevers until they're side-by-side.

JILL'S HAND

slowly creeps onto Jack's lap, fingers searching, until they find his hand."

Above, the "mental camera shot" is basically a closeup of Jill's hand, without having to write "CLOSE ON: Jill's hand." The minislug is setting the shot.

You could also work it like...

"Closer. Little by little, inch by inch, she manuevers until they're side-by-side. She slowly slides her hand down to

JACK'S LAP

letting her fingers playfully search until they find his hand."

There are other instances where you could use the minislug for camera shots and location changes. You can also use it instead of having to label a shot as a character's POV (like "JACKS POV: blah blah blah END POV.) Get creative.


"Jill peers through the bushes to see

JACK

whispering to the housekeeper; his hand caressing the inside of her arm."
______________

"Jill looks up to see

JACK'S FACE,

bloody and bruised...."
_______________

"Jack furiously sips his punch as he looks

ACROSS THE ROOM

at Jill cleaning Bill's molars with her tongue."


I really like minislugs and feel that they add both visual depth and improved pacing/flow to my scripts. However, to really get a feel for how to use the "right," you need to read more scripts which use them. All of Dave Steinberg's scripts use them. He writes crappy stories, but he has kick-a$$ format and is a Jedi Master at using minislugs, so you might want to check out some of his scripts.

Hope this helps,

Opty

[Rainy Night]

That helps - thanks all.

Scott