Teens Writing for Teens, the 5th
- Thread starter It's-Magic!
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Yay Elu!! 
*stares at BB* Wow. I had no idea how much Hartman was in this until I had to find all his scenes so I can remove/change them.
Wouldn't you guys mind taking a look at my query? I had to almost completely rewrite it to match the new story and I want to know if the plot works. I don't really want to go back to QLH this soon after I was just there.
*stares at BB* Wow. I had no idea how much Hartman was in this until I had to find all his scenes so I can remove/change them.
Wouldn't you guys mind taking a look at my query? I had to almost completely rewrite it to match the new story and I want to know if the plot works. I don't really want to go back to QLH this soon after I was just there.
Oh goodness, congrats! That's awesome, Elu!
Yay Elu!!
*stares at BB* Wow. I had no idea how much Hartman was in this until I had to find all his scenes so I can remove/change them.
Wouldn't you guys mind taking a look at my query? I had to almost completely rewrite it to match the new story and I want to know if the plot works. I don't really want to go back to QLH this soon after I was just there.
Thanks, guys.
And I'll look at it if you post it, HR.
Thanks Karla. Not quite... Someone in QLH told me that Twice Shy is the title of a book by an adult author that also involves horses. So I've gone back to Burning Bridges, at least for now. I've been playing with the idea of smoke or fire, like Where There's Smoke or something.
I don't like the "deathly" adverb either, but I feel like "afraid" won't get the point across. When I say she's afraid to leave the ranch, I mean she actually has a panic attack whenever she thinks about setting foot off the property.
Good point! I never really thought about having that line in a query while sending it to agents with a "no response means no" policy...
Not quite... Someone in QLH told me that Twice Shy is the title of a book by an adult author that also involves horses. So I've gone back to Burning Bridges, at least for now. I've been playing with the idea of smoke or fire, like Where There's Smoke or something. I don't like the "deathly" adverb either, but I feel like "afraid" won't get the point across. When I say she's afraid to leave the ranch, I mean she actually has a panic attack whenever she thinks about setting foot off the property.
Good point! I never really thought about having that line in a query while sending it to agents with a "no response means no" policy...
I don't really see why that matters... I mean, you DO look forward to hearing from them, even if they say "no response means no." You don't want no response, you want a response, you want them to like your book - therefore, I don't really see why saying "I look forward to hearing from you" should be a problem.
I do like your query, though, HR. Just one question - does Kaye ever get over that fear? Because I think that's something that you might want to try and work in a little more.
Thanks, Kyrie.
Not entirely. Any phobia can take a long time to overcome. At the end of the book she finally admits that she has a phobia and applies herself to overcoming it, but it's not very central to the story.
Oooh that's a good point, Ky. I was just thinking that it means she's expecting a response, not that she wants one. For me, at least, looking forward to something means I'm expecting something good to happen.
Karla: Well, yeah, I mean if you know off the bat that they're going to turn you down, why send the query? You're hoping they'll like it, and if they like it then you expect a response. *shrugs* To me it just seems like a simple and polite way to sign off.
Para: Hallo. How're you?
Para: Hallo.
How're you?
So true, Ky!
I need an idea for a present a girlfriend might give a guy for his birthday. Except the present will be from a friend who's a girl, more specifically, his ex. It's very important for my MC's current girlfriend to be jealous enough to withdraw from him a little. It paves the way for an important but not major turning point...
I need an idea for a present a girlfriend might give a guy for his birthday. Except the present will be from a friend who's a girl, more specifically, his ex. It's very important for my MC's current girlfriend to be jealous enough to withdraw from him a little. It paves the way for an important but not major turning point...
So after a wonderful week in disney i come back to go through a day of pure hell... life is a B*&^%
Karla, how old are your MC's because at around 15-18 ANY possible gift an ex gives would make the current girlfriend jealous, turst me. But if your really going for super jealous, then i'd say have her give him something that is really important to him, his favorite new book, the new cd of a band he loves ect...
Karla, how old are your MC's because at around 15-18 ANY possible gift an ex gives would make the current girlfriend jealous, turst me. But if your really going for super jealous, then i'd say have her give him something that is really important to him, his favorite new book, the new cd of a band he loves ect...
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Ahh sorry for the day of pure hell, Ally.... that sucks.
My main characters are seniors. And I was kind of thinking something expensive, so that the gf is like, why would an ex spend that much money on you... blah blah...
My main characters are seniors. And I was kind of thinking something expensive, so that the gf is like, why would an ex spend that much money on you... blah blah...
:3
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