Existential Dilemma?

[Celia Cyanide]

I read with interest the thread about "Why Do You Write?" I didn't participate, because I wasn't sure why. But I found it interesting that many others seemed to be saying, "I have to," or "I didn't know I had a choice."

I was wondering if any of you sometimes feel like...well, you have to write, but you don't really want to? We always asks questions of each other, like "How should I start?" and "Why am I getting frustrated with this?" So I think most of us would agree that it isn't fun, at least not all the time.

So I tend to feel like, if it isn't fun, why do it? If I don't get this manuscript finished, or if I do, will it matter?

I tend to have an existential dilemma about everything I do, and I guess writing is no exception. If you have this existential dilemma about writing, how do you resolve it?

[zornhau]

For me, the downside of being a wannbe author is the opportunity cost: time not spent doing other cool stuff, including especially husband and dad stuff.

The only way of resolving it, short of a mace to the creative centres of my brain, is to sell enough to make the "hobby" support itself.

However, IMvHO, most of the angst I see on this board and others boils down to on fo the following:

Making a fuss as proof of creativity without actually having to do any work. You can find posers like this in most creative fields. Walk on by.
Want to be a writer, but actually dislike or writing (or can't do it) No better than wanting to be a rock musician, but ending up with 30 guitars on the wall and no idea how to play them. We're in Games People Play mode here. Again, walk on by.
Love writing, but keep getting stuck. Most people think it's a motivation problem because they feel so downhearted, but really it's a gap on their skillset - e.g. they have a wonderful ability to evoke things, but no sense of plot, or visa versa. I think this can be cured by going all no-ego and identifyign the technical problem and working out how to fix it.
Love writing but too insecure to show it to anybody. Just do it! Life is short.
Love writing, know how to do it, but have trouble organising time to write. Life laundry time. Sorry.

[henriette]

"So I tend to feel like, if it isn't fun, why do it? If I don't get this manuscript finished, or if I do, will it matter?"

i don't think any sort of art, whether for commerce or for art's own sake, is ever truly "fun". i mean, a project is always exciting and thrilling in the beginning stages, but eventually the artist reaches the point where they have to make the decision to continue (which includes hard work) or abandon their work.

for example: i used to work in music theatre, which is often a lot of fun. tap dancing, singing songs, working two hours a night once the show is up. but then there is the week (or two or three) before the show, where an exhausted cast, most with colds that rip their throats as they sing, work 12-14 hour days. next comes the "cue-to-cue", a long, tedious rehearsal where the show is broken down to arrange every little technical detail. for the actors, it is literally hell. some large productions (like phantom of the opera) have an entire WEEK of cue-to-cue. *shudder*

my point? although one might be in the artistic project of their dreams, one will still find getting to the end result involves dirty, exhausting work. writing a novel is no different.

"If you have this existential dilemma about writing, how do you resolve it?"

by making the decision to stick with the project until the end. i'm a notorious "never-finishes-what-she-starts" type, but i've made a serious vow to myself that this novel i'm writing is the one project i will not abandon during the tough times. it's imperative for my own sense of self to accomplish the one thing i've wanted to do but never had the guts or mind-set to do it. so i write, even if it's only a few paragraphs one day instead of a brillant full chapter, and look forward to the day i can type "the end". the day WILL come! :)

[WriterInChains]

Hi Celia,

"So I tend to feel like, if it isn't fun, why do it? If I don't get this manuscript finished, or if I do, will it matter?"

This is just me, but I push through the times when it feels like I'm spinning my wheels, or that I have no talent and am destined to remain a wannabe forever, because experience has taught me that those moments pass. At 40 I've finally realized that everything passes, so anything that I don't choose to put on my figurative plate doesn't get there -- with the singular exception of the job that puts food on my literal plate.

I feel like this a lot: "What does it matter?" And if I truly don't feel like writing one day, I let myself take the day off and read or do something else instead. But, in the end, it matters to me and that's what I hold on to. That, and the fact that my r/t crit group will be expecting pages and I know what to expect if those pages aren't up to snuf. And, I'm one of those strange people who actually prefers the company of my laptop or a notebook to most social events. :)

Everyone has a choice; everyone makes choices every day -- the trick is, to make the ones that you'll look back on and can live with. If I gave up on my writing, it would be like giving up on a big part of myself. I couldn't live with that.

Thanks for putting this out on the forum.
Have a great day! :)
caren

[azbikergirl]

I'm one of those "gotta write" people, but I don't have that dilemma. Writing is a blast. Sometimes it can be frustrating, but that usually happens when the inner editor is wrestling with the writer. If that editor chick would just shut the hell up, we'd be fine. If it wasn't fun, I wouldn't do it. Life is far too precious to waste on things I don't enjoy. (That's why I hire out some of the chore-type duties around my house!)

[Celia Cyanide]

for example: i used to work in music theatre, which is often a lot of fun.

I think that's a great example, because I often compare writing to acting. There is a very big difference in how I got involved in it. A few years ago, I decided to start taking acting classes, and I got really good at it, so I started auditioning for films around town, and started getting roles. Sometimes, I audition for a part I really, really want. When I don't get it, it's disappointing, but I knew that would happen when I decided to become an actor. When I work very hard on the audition, I usually get a phone call saying, "We wanted someone with a different hair color, but we wanted to let you know we really liked your auditon." I suppose that's the equivalent of getting a really complimentary rejection letter.

But when I write, I can't seem to see it the same way I see acting! I don't really feel like I chose to start writing, therefore, when I face rejection as a writer, I'm like, "great, now I'm a failure at this thing I never really wanted to do anyway!" And yet I can't choose to stop doing it.

I also have this problem that it feels like, if it's fun, I'm not working hard enough. Like if I'm really going to do it, I have to do it until it hurts. But one day, this girl in my acting class said to me, "Wow, this character I'm working on is giving me a migrane!" I was like, woah! Slow down! This is supposed to be fun! But maybe she wanted to work on her acting until it hurt. azbikergirl, you're very lucky to find writing fun!

Caren:

If I gave up on my writing, it would be like giving up on a big part of myself. I couldn't live with that.

That's very true. I think that's what everyone means when they say they don't have a choice. :)

[Jamesaritchie]

I have no existential dilemma. Life is short. Sometimes extremely short. It should be spent doing things we really enjoy doing.

I never have bought the "I have to write" theory. No one has to write. It's always a choice.

From my perspective, there's only two reasons to write. 1. You enjoy writing enough to want to write. 2. You firmly believe the end result will be worth the effort

henriette is right. If you want to be an actor, musician, singer, whatever, you have to practice, rehearse, and study. And if you really want to be a published writer, you have to sit down and write.

But if you don't think the end result justifies the agony of the practice, study, and rehearsal, then I don't think there's any reason to do it.

Writing is not always fun for me, but it is nearly always enjoyable. I write because I want to spend my hours writing. It's that simple. And there's the bonus of the money. But I need both, because the money is the only way I have time to sit down and enjoy writing.

But if I didn't enjoy writing, I simply would't do it. The world is full of fun things to do, and one of them matches all of us.

[henriette]

last night i was lamenting to my husband that i can't approach my novel exactly like performing, because in the rehearsal process one can dance in front of a mirror, or record a song and play it back. the performer can then visualize their performance and tweak it easily. there is no such equivalent in writing. i mean, i read back what i wrote and i think it's good but how do i *really* know?

celia, i'd like your thoughts on this: an actor does his job, which is listening and reacting. the other actors are doing their job, listening and reacting to you. however, an author has to do EVERYONE's job! the author must create every character, know every character's motivations etc etc. i find it easy to get into my narrator's character but delving into the others is sometimes difficult. it's like being in a play where you play every role...

[maestrowork]

Do what you love to do which you can do better than most people in the world and make lots of money doing it until you don't love it anymore...
-- my pal, Ed

[reph]

i find it easy to get into my narrator's character but delving into the others is sometimes difficult. it's like being in a play where you play every role...
On that model, writing is more like directing than like acting.

[Celia Cyanide]

From my perspective, there's only two reasons to write. 1. You enjoy writing enough to want to write. 2. You firmly believe the end result will be worth the effort

What about 3. You have something to express because it hurts when you keep it inside, but it also hurts when you try to express it?

Of course you have to write if you want to be a published writer, but if we haven't seen that end result yet, we won't know if it's worth it. Part of having an existential dilemma (and I am an expert on existential dilemmas!) is not knowing if anything matters. If I publish it, will that matter? If I don't publish it, would it still be worth writing? Sartre had an existential dilemma. He might have chosen not to write, because he didn't know if it mattered. Had he chosen not to, I would not have one of my favorite books. And ironically, I might not have my existential dilemma(s). ;)

There is also the reason that zornhau mentioned, and that's wanting to be a rock star, without really doing the work. But the thing people don't realize is that if you wanna be a rock star, you just have to go down to the club and fill out an application. They actually aren't that picky about who they let in, you'd be surprised. It works, too. People say I'm a rock star all the time. When you go the easy route, you don't get to play music, but everyone thinks you're cool. And you don't make any money, but you get free drinks, so I figure that evens out. It's pretty sweet. ;)

last night i was lamenting to my husband that i can't approach my novel exactly like performing, because in the rehearsal process one can dance in front of a mirror, or record a song and play it back. the performer can then visualize their performance and tweak it easily.

You know, I never thought of that, but it's very true. I have always loved acting for the camera, because you get to see your performance the way other people see it. But you can't really do that with writing. You can't separate reading it over from writing, the way you can when you watch your own performance.

I think you're right about characters, too. When you write a script, which I have done, you don't always have to develop the characters as much, because it is expected that the actors and director will do that. They want to, and might even get kind of annoyed if you never let them. But with a novel? You're on your own!

[maestrowork]

What about 3. You have something to express because it hurts when you keep it inside, but it also hurts when you try to express it?


You can certainly write for cathartic reasons. But if we're talking about getting published, they're usually not very good reasons to "write" unless what you're trying to express is felt by millions of people (e.g. 9/11 or surviving cancer) and you have something unique and helpful to say.

But where's the joy of it?

[henriette]

celia- are you referring to "the age of reason"? i recently tried to read it (found a wonderful old hardback copy and said why not) but couldn't get past the first few chapters. the scene with the cats almost being drowned probably did it...i feel i should get through it but that visual of those poor kitties in the basket stops me from reaching for it every time...

[azbikergirl]

You know, I never thought of that, but it's very true. I have always loved acting for the camera, because you get to see your performance the way other people see it. But you can't really do that with writing. You can't separate reading it over from writing, the way you can when you watch your own performance.
You can come close; read it out loud or have someone read it to you. I use software that will read text aloud, and it's helpful for catching snags in my writing.

[Jamesaritchie]

What about 3. You have something to express because it hurts when you keep it inside, but it also hurts when you try to express it?

Of course you have to write if you want to be a published writer, but if we haven't seen that end result yet, we won't know if it's worth it. Part of having an existential dilemma (and I am an expert on existential dilemmas!) is not knowing if anything matters. If I publish it, will that matter? If I don't publish it, would it still be worth writing? Sartre had an existential dilemma. He might have chosen not to write, because he didn't know if it mattered. Had he chosen not to, I would not have one of my favorite books. And ironically, I might not have my existential dilemma(s). ;)

!

Sometimes you just have to pay your nickel and take your chances. The one thing I know for absolutely certain is that if you don't do something, you'll never, ever know whether or not it would have mattered.

No one can see what will happen in the future, but it's very easy to see what won't happen. If you don't write, it's certain it will never matter because the writing will never exist.

[Celia Cyanide]

You can certainly write for cathartic reasons. But if we're talking about getting published, they're usually not very good reasons to "write" unless what you're trying to express is felt by millions of people (e.g. 9/11 or surviving cancer) and you have something unique and helpful to say.

But where's the joy of it?

Well, I think it can be interesting and helpful to say something that most people don't know about, and people who do know about it don't want to talk about it. I can't think of a good example I've read off hand, but that's because I usually read depressing existentialist "nothing matters" crap. ;) But when I read a story and I see a character that has a problem I have that I don't see portrayed very often, it makes me happy, if only for a while. ;)

henriette, I am referring to Nausea. A depressing but but brilliant novel about essence vs. existance, art and life.

[scarletpeaches]

I'd rather try and know what became of trying to be published, than not try out of fear, and spend the rest of my life wondering.

[zornhau]

I'd rather try and know what became of trying to be published, than not try out of fear, and spend the rest of my life wondering.

Wells said! Good for you :Clap:

[blacbird]

I'd rather try and know what became of trying to be published, than not try out of fear, and spend the rest of my life wondering.

Beware of what you wish for. Trying for a very long time, until you do find out what becomes of trying, presents a whole new set of issues. Perhaps ignorance really is bliss.

bird

[reph]

Whether something matters depends on your feelings about it. Is a goal truly worth working toward? Yes, by definition, if it's your goal. Depression will remove a sense that anything matters. Sorry, there's no way out of the existentialist pit unless you leap out by adopting an absolute.

[Niesta]

I don't think writing would be half so enjoyable or rewarding if it were easy. I see no contradiction between "I love doing this" and "Sometimes it's so difficult I just want to pound my head on the table." The challenge IS the fun.

[Sage]

The knowledge that I'm producing something entertaining (even if it's just for me) is what makes it worth going through the less fun parts like researching or feeling stuck. Sometimes I write just because I have nothing else to do. Like I could be sitting down watching tv, but instead I'm going to write (or do both. I'm big on doing something w/ my hands while I'm watching tv). The fact that I know that, at the very least, I have two friends who beg me for new stories & one that enjoys the stories I've written in the past is an added bonus. But even if I didn't write it down, I'd still write fiction in my head. I've been doing it since I was little. It's just that this one is actually potentially publishable, so I'm even more excited about finishing it.

I'm sure if I didn't have Stephanie & Heather begging me for more, I might get a little more frustrated with writing, but in the end, the person who has read my past fiction most, who has adored it & gone back to be entertained by it again = me! I mostly write to entertain myself. And writing it down means that it's preserved on paper and also that I created something. Which is a great feeling. Even if nothing ever gets published, even if I can never go into Borders & point to a shelf & say, "Hey, that's me," I still have created these fun stories.

Of course, that doesn't mean I don't occasionally get all, "Oh god, my work sucks. I'll never be published" or "Oh, god, I hate working on this part. It's not going anywhere, but I need it." But that doesn't last very long, luckily.

Do you have anyone who you can share your work w/, Celia? That might make it feel more worth while, even if you never get it published.

[Sage]

I don't think writing would be half so enjoyable or rewarding if it were easy. I see no contradiction between "I love doing this" and "Sometimes it's so difficult I just want to pound my head on the table." The challenge IS the fun.

Yes, like doing puzzles or logic problems.

[Celia Cyanide]

Do you have anyone who you can share your work w/, Celia? That might make it feel more worth while, even if you never get it published.

That's a good idea...when I was a teenager I had that, but I haven't really done that for so long. I think we're similar, because even when I don't write, I'm still writing in my head. :) And I wonder, what is the point of writing it down, if I've got it all up there? But I bet I could show it to people, and they would like it.

I wanted to thank everyone for their participation in this thread. I hestitated posting it, because I was afraid it would sound like, "Poor me! I suck! I'll never be a writer!" which isn't what I had intended. But people have really interesting ideas about why they write, why they get frustrated, but still feel like they can't stop, and why they feel it matters, no matter how successful they are. It's very interesting to read. Thank you.

[scarletpeaches]

Beware of what you wish for. Trying for a very long time, until you do find out what becomes of trying, presents a whole new set of issues. Perhaps ignorance really is bliss.

bird

Might as well just give up, then. Never write another word. Who am I to dare thinking I could make something of my life...

[SC Harrison]

I'd like to be able to say that I am driven to write by some overpowering impulse to create a literary masterpiece that will live on long after I am gone from this world, allowing me to take some comfort that my inevitable death will not be the end of me.

In reality, I know this will probably never happen. Yet, the active pursuit of this goal has allowed me to open doorways in my brain that would have remained closed otherwise. I now know that I have the ability to use the written language to do more than just communicate with others. I can re-create the world any way I desire. I can slow time down or speed it up in this world, and I can right wrongs or wrong rights if I wish. Is this a shallow viewpoint, not to be admired for its lack of nobility? Oh, hell yes. Self-gratification may not be a recipe for success in this business, but it will always be an ingredient in my writing.

I do want others to be entertained by what I write, but I know that most won't. Does this cause me to wonder if it's worth it sometimes? Yes, of course. Sometimes I go for days without writing something, as if it is a chore to be avoided. Often I think I have very little talent for writing, and should stop deluding myself. Then I go and write something that I think is pretty damned good, so I'm back to thinking I've really got what it takes.

I probably am wasting my time, but it's better than being horsewhipped.

[trebuchet]

I love to write. I hate to write. The pendulum swings wildly for me. Why do I do it? I don't know. I used to believe it was because I had no choice, that if I put down my pen for good it would be the end of me. Then it was because I believed I had something to say, and the world must hear it. Then it was because I felt like giving up but I'd be darned if I had to call myself a quitter. I've just hauled myself up from "I completely suck and have wasted a good portion of life." But I figured out how to reconcile it all. I remind myself that for me, writing is life, it's my process, the good and the bad, and it's okay, and so I cannot fail.

[AdamH]

I'd rather try and know what became of trying to be published, than not try out of fear, and spend the rest of my life wondering.

Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. -Alfred Lord Tennyson


That's exactly what I think. -Adam (AKA me)

[Celia Cyanide]

Might as well just give up, then. Never write another word. Who am I to dare thinking I could make something of my life...

If other people can make something of their lives through writing, there is no reason why you can't. I think blacbird was just pointing out the unpopular but very true viewpoint that it sometimes hurts to try and fail. If it didn't, we'd all go around being happy all the time and be left with nothing interesting to write about. :)

[Jamesaritchie]

Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. -Alfred Lord Tennyson


That's exactly what I think. -Adam (AKA me)

"Ah, but tis better still to have loved and won." --Me

[blacbird]

Might as well just give up, then. Never write another word. Who am I to dare thinking I could make something of my life...

What I said wasn't to be taken as a recommendation. Only a reflection on personal experience.

bird

[Tippy]

I never have bought the "I have to write" theory. No one has to write. It's always a choice.






I must respectfully disagree - at least slightly. For some, there has always been the haunting drive to write. Some children sit quietly on their beds at night while their siblings watch TV. They write in their journals, compose poetry and lyrics. For some, there is an innate 'need' to 'get it on paper'.

Our earliest glimpses of mankind come from those who wrote and drew on cave walls. Within them beat the heart of the archiver. What made one little boy stay behind when the others went on the hunt; content to mix plant dye and tell his story through stick figures? I wonder if his mother appreciated his efforts, or chastised him for defacing their home?

Certainly, many today write only for the so-called prestige of calling themselves, an 'author'. Some are very good at it - and some are very bad. My need to write is secondary only to my need to read. I may never become published. I want to - but I don't know if I have the fortitude to suffer through rejection after rejection. That knowledge, however, doesn't deter the writing demon that demands his pound of flesh on the keyboard daily.

I am reminded of the insatiable drive to write - and how it has affected our view of historical events. Ann Frank's gentle ghost still lives, through her writing, to tell the horror of humans who relish power and control, and the inevitable fallout. A child driven to record her fears, her dreams - even when her world was was spinning out of control. She hid. She wrote. And we thank her for her presence of mind to do so.

That, I sincerely feel, is at the crux of the writing drive. Immortality. Or the closest we can come to it.

[Jamesaritchie]

I must respectfully disagree - at least slightly. For some, there has always been the haunting drive to write. Some children sit quietly on their beds at night while their siblings watch TV. They write in their journals, compose poetry and lyrics. For some, there is an innate 'need' to 'get it on paper'.

Our earliest glimpses of mankind come from those who wrote and drew on cave walls. Within them beat the heart of the archiver. What made one little boy stay behind when the others went on the hunt; content to mix plant dye and tell his story through stick figures? I wonder if his mother appreciated his efforts, or chastised him for defacing their home?

Certainly, many today write only for the so-called prestige of calling themselves, an 'author'. Some are very good at it - and some are very bad. My need to write is secondary only to my need to read. I may never become published. I want to - but I don't know if I have the fortitude to suffer through rejection after rejection. That knowledge, however, doesn't deter the writing demon that demands his pound of flesh on the keyboard daily.

I am reminded of the insatiable drive to write - and how it has affected our view of historical events. Ann Frank's gentle ghost still lives, through her writing, to tell the horror of humans who relish power and control, and the inevitable fallout. A child driven to record her fears, her dreams - even when her world was was spinning out of control. She hid. She wrote. And we thank her for her presence of mind to do so.

That, I sincerely feel, is at the crux of the writing drive. Immortality. Or the closest we can come to it.

But is it a have to, or a real strong want to? Is it a have to, or simply something you really and truly enjoy?

Who knows what made cave men write on walls? It may have been to please the Gods, it may have been because it rained for five days straight and there was nothing else to do. Or some cave boy may have been writing "I will not shove Ugla in front of charging woolly mammoths" five hundred times.

[scarletpeaches]

What I said wasn't to be taken as a recommendation. Only a reflection on personal experience.

bird

I know. For anyone who thought I was being serious, I was using my words to show how absurd it would be to give up on a dream just because you MIGHT be knocked back.

Well so what if I am? At least I'll have tried and done my best in the process.

Funny how a handful of words can have an effect on people, isn't it?

Oh wait, isn't that what members of this forum are aiming for?!

[SC Harrison]

I know. For anyone who thought I was being serious, I was using my words to show how absurd it would be to give up on a dream just because you MIGHT be knocked back.

Well so what if I am? At least I'll have tried and done my best in the process.

Funny how a handful of words can have an effect on people, isn't it?

Oh wait, isn't that what members of this forum are aiming for?!



I can't believe somebody actually said it, but yes.

I can't speak for others (although I may try), but posting on forums is, more often than not, a self-serving exercise as opposed to a genuine effort to help others or glean knowledge from the more learned.

To see my words in print and know that others will read and digest them, goes to the core of what motivates me to not only continue writing, but to improve it as well. I'm not only referring to the "this is what I wrote, tell me what you think" type posts.

I believe all writers are existentialists to a certain degree, in that they operate from an egocentric viewpoint, regardless of how selfless and/or objective their words may seem. This may cause us to focus on the positive aspects of what we write, and search for fallacies in the words of others. In a perfect world we would do the exact opposite, but we don't live there.

[Celia Cyanide]

But is it a have to, or a real strong want to? Is it a have to, or simply something you really and truly enjoy?

Speaking for myself, I definately do not enjoy it sometimes, and I definately feel like I do not want to do it. There is nothing biological about it, but I wouldn't say that proves that we don't really "need" to do it. I think I need to write like I need people in my life. People can be complicated, and a bit annoying to deal with at times. But we must be getting something from other people that we need, or else we wouldn't do it.

The problem is when writing starts to feel like a codependent relationship.

[pconsidine]

It's quite simple really. As Dorothy Parker said, "I hate writing, but I love having written" (possibly misattributed).

Look at it this way - if you were to hike up a mountain, twist your ankle, be stuck in the rain overnight and have to hike back down the next day, would you call that fun? Hell no. But when you stood at the foot of the mountain, would you look back up at it and say, "Take that, you sonuvabitch"? Absolutely.

Not everything worth doing is fun. And not everything fun is worth doing.

[Danger Jane]

I'm kind of like you--I debate MYSELF about almost EVERYTHING. My friends think it's entertaining, because they all just argue with their parents.

Do you enjoy writing? I can't answer it for you...why do you force yourself to finish a MS? Is it because you can't wait to get the story right, because you want these characters and conflicts untangled? Or is it because writing's what you DO...without it, what is there?

[scarletpeaches]

I write because I feel compelled to; it's the easiest way for me to express myself. It's also fun. Exasperating, hard work, but also fun. Let's face it, it must be a labour of love - there are easier things all of us could be doing with our time aren't there?! Or maybe we're just more self-disciplined than other, non-writing mortals. :D *Cough*

[Danger Jane]

I write because I feel compelled to; it's the easiest way for me to express myself. It's also fun. Exasperating, hard work, but also fun. Let's face it, it must be a labour of love - there are easier things all of us could be doing with our time aren't there?! Or maybe we're just more self-disciplined than other, non-writing mortals. :D *Cough*

Same. If I don't write I'm more unbearable than usual...I need to. I want to write because I need to write and I suppose I need to write because there's feelings I can't tell people. But they have to come out somehow.

[scarletpeaches]

It's like fictionalising your diary or your thoughts and making money out of it! (Hopefully)! ;)

[Celia Cyanide]

It's like fictionalising your diary or your thoughts and making money out of it! (Hopefully)! ;)

Or, just entertain people. If even a few people can be entertained by all the weird things I notice and write down, I think it's worth something, even if I never get paid. ;)

[Danger Jane]

In a manner of speaking. If it was JUST like that I'd just query my diary with different names.

...if I pretend I think it's silly they'll never know...

Thoughts and feelings are really important in my writing, probably because I dwell on them so much. So yeah, writing is a release.

[scarletpeaches]

Like a cerebral orgasm!

Right, I'm obviously not right in the head. Time for me to go get some sleep I think.

[Danger Jane]

Yeah, EXACTLY like that...

God, it's like you're reading my mind...

omg call the cliche police!

[Celia Cyanide]

omg call the cliche police!

I'm sure they're already on their way. They probably saw the title of this thread! :)

[AncientEagle]

Like a cerebral orgasm!

Thanks just the same, but I'll stick with the old fashioned kind.

[Celia Cyanide]

Thanks just the same, but I'll stick with the old fashioned kind.

IMO, the old fashioned kind are much easier to achieve.

[scarletpeaches]

And much easier to find than LSD (Literary Sex Drugs).

[scarletpeaches]

Oh and Mdlle Nancy - Perhaps rather than a cerebral orgasm, we were talking about something closer to a 'headsneeze'? :D

[Supafly]

I'm a gotta write person. Sitting down for hours writing might not be the coolest thing, but I spend several hours per day writing and I still have time to go our with my friends, hit the city, go to school, to work, do all the ordinary things. It all depends on how you manage your time. Of course, if you have children, there is a whole other level to the argument because that should be the number one priority.

It might help to remember that actually sitting down to write a book is not suppose to be a fun experience. Its a tedious process filled with emotional extremes. The only real good part about writing a book is when you enter that last period of the last sentence. For lack of a better word, its...orgasmic. Thus, going into a new book expecting anything other than a long period of sitting down is unrealistic.

Also, finding someone to read your work like a close friend or relative might help. They may not be the most objective critics, but still hearing someone talking about your writing can keep you going on for a little longer.

[Danger Jane]

Oh and Mdlle Nancy - Perhaps rather than a cerebral orgasm, we were talking about something closer to a 'headsneeze'? :D

"Whatever You Say!"

:gone:

:D

[Higgins]

I read with interest the thread about "Why Do You Write?" I didn't participate, because I wasn't sure why. But I found it interesting that many others seemed to be saying, "I have to," or "I didn't know I had a choice."

I was wondering if any of you sometimes feel like...well, you have to write, but you don't really want to? We always asks questions of each other, like "How should I start?" and "Why am I getting frustrated with this?" So I think most of us would agree that it isn't fun, at least not all the time.

So I tend to feel like, if it isn't fun, why do it? If I don't get this manuscript finished, or if I do, will it matter?

I tend to have an existential dilemma about everything I do, and I guess writing is no exception. If you have this existential dilemma about writing, how do you resolve it?

Reading existentialists is the best cure for Existential dilemmas. Actually, if you read Heidegger's Being and Time first, Sartre's Being and nothingness is pretty funny.

[chartreuse]

I'm a gotta write person. Sitting down for hours writing might not be the coolest thing, but I spend several hours per day writing and I still have time to go our with my friends, hit the city, go to school, to work, do all the ordinary things.

The only thing I can assume is that your days must be considerably longer than the normal 24 hours.

Anyway, to stay with the original topic - for me, the ultimate question has boiled down to this: If someone were to show up who had absolute knowledge of the future, and KNEW that no matter how hard I worked, how much time I put towards writing, no matter WHAT I would never be published and not make a cent, would I still do it?

I'm still working on the answer to that question. However, I do think that I found one piece of the puzzle when I came across something Deepak Chopra wrote that had to do with choices. He was talking about how we always get hung up on making the "right" choices - finding the "right" partner, the "right" job, etc. He said that the universe is actually quite flexible, and that we don't need to spend so much time overthinking what the right decision might be in any given situation. We should just do what intuitively feels right without trying to analyze every possible consequence and every possible future, and the universe will work with whatever we give it.

So, I guess the idea is to simply to trust your instincts. The trick is to quiet all the voices in your head and just listen to what you probably already know.

[Jewel101]

if it was all fun, would we really write?

for me, one of the reasons i write is for that little girl who leaves her abusive household behind and set off on my journey that i gave her and get strength from it to become all that she can be.

...and to get published and see my name on a book

but I think that even if i knew i wouldn't get published i would still write, for the enjoyment, for the theropy, and for the growth. Hell, even for a way to waste time. I just love writing

truth is, i never have those existential dilemmas for writing, I have it for life. But i don't have it as often i find that when I do, all i need to think about are the people i'm helping and the lives i'm affecting. Yes, even the man i open the door for and give a smile to. You'll be amazed what the littlest actions can do. Don't think that your life doesn't affect others when you read this, because it does. Everyone that just posted has set of a chain of events that never would have happened otherwise. Who knows, maybe that man i smiled at was at the bottom of his life and thinking of suicide at that moment, but decided to live on because i showed him that there was still a little kindness left in the world. Who knows, maybe he's a brilliant scientist that will one day discover the cure for cancer and save many lives if he could simply get through his.

I know depression sucks and it's near impossible to drag yourself out of it but thinking of other people helps me. it will pass. it's just the actions that you make during that time that you have to worry about.

see, look at what you guys did simply by posting your thoughts, i was planning on simply writing the first line. :tongue