Sentence Construction/Verb Conjugation?

Jessianodel · Feb 22, 2011

I'm a little shaky on the verb conjugation in this sentence(I really hope that is spelled right):

[FONT=&quot]He was leaned up against the wall of the building on his cell phone, the red rope dangling from his right hand as surges of kids strode past him into the club.[/FONT]

Word wanted to say it was cleaned (which makes no sense) so it made me feel like maybe something was wrong with the sentence construction or something. It would probably be simpler to he was leaning, huh?

I'm not a guru of grammar so I'm always nervous on whether everything's written perfectly.

Thanks guys!

bonitakale · Feb 22, 2011

He was leaning.

Or he had leaned. Or he leaned.

You can say, "He was crumpled against the wall," but not, "He was leaned against the wall." "Leaned" doesn't become an adjective that way, at least, not when applying to the person who does the leaning. ("The picture had been leaned against the wall,"would be okay.)

Dandroid · Feb 22, 2011

unless, of course, you had intended to say that people had leaned him against a wall of a building that had been built on his cell phone...tee hee

Jamesaritchie · Feb 22, 2011

Jessianodel said:
I'm a little shaky on the verb conjugation in this sentence(I really hope that is spelled right):

[FONT=&quot]He was leaned up against the wall of the building on his cell phone, the red rope dangling from his right hand as surges of kids strode past him into the club.[/FONT]

Word wanted to say it was cleaned (which makes no sense) so it made me feel like maybe something was wrong with the sentence construction or something. It would probably be simpler to he was leaning, huh?

I'm not a guru of grammar so I'm always nervous on whether everything's written perfectly.

Thanks guys!

He ~~was~~ leaned against the wall of the building, using his cell phone, the red rope dangling from his right hand as surges of kids strode past him into teh club.

Or, He was leaning against the wall of the building, using his cell phone, the red rope dangling from his right hand as surges of kids strode past him into teh club.

PeterL · Feb 23, 2011

He was leaned would be fine, if he had been petrified and someone took him and leaned him there; but if he walked to the side of the building and leaned there, then the "was" does not belong.

PinkAmy · Feb 23, 2011

Jessianodel said:
[FONT=&quot]He was leaned up against the wall of the building on his cell phone, the red rope dangling from his right hand as surges of kids strode past him into the club.[/FONT]

Or
Leaning against the wall on his cell phone, the red rope dangled from his right hand as surges of kids entered the club.

Susan Coffin · Feb 23, 2011

He was leaned up against the wall of the building on his cell phone, the red rope dangling from his right hand as surges of kids strode past him into the club.

I have not read any other the other responses, but here's my thoughts on your sentence.

First of all, I don't think you need the was. Second, it also sounds like the cell phone is on the building. Finally, surges and strode basically say the same thing, as they are both verbs. Surge can be a noun, such as a wave of motion, but it still describes movement. Thus, you have two movement words (surge and strode) very close together.

I would like to offer something like this:

He leaned against the wall of the building, his cell phone up to his ear. The red rope dangled from his right hand as a group of kids strode past him into the club.

Dr.Gonzo · Feb 23, 2011

It'd work if he was dead and stiff and some undertaker had leaned him against the wall and then gone on his lunch break. otherwise, leaning, or he leaned.

Susan Coffin · Feb 23, 2011

Dr.Gonzo said:
It'd work if he was dead and stiff and some undertaker had leaned him against the wall QUOTE]

Jessianodel · Feb 23, 2011

Yeah unfortunately he's not unconscious.

So "he was leaning against the building" works?

Splendad · Feb 24, 2011

"surges of kids..." me not like.

mountainannie · Feb 24, 2011

how about "propped" for "leaned"

there is an implication that someone else PUT him there... with both words
otherwise

I think that "leaning" would be the correct word

Sentence Construction/Verb Conjugation?

Jessianodel

Blessed by the AW Gods

bonitakale

Dandroid

Jamesaritchie

PeterL

PinkAmy

New kid, be gentle!

Susan Coffin

Tell it like it Is

Dr.Gonzo

Wonderfully Irreverent

Susan Coffin

Tell it like it Is

Jessianodel

Blessed by the AW Gods

Splendad

Correcting a man? Be right.

mountainannie