Grammar in first person

I've seen things where the first person narrator uses dialect also. Apparently it is acceptable, but it can be tiresome, so I think that you should be careful how much you use.

You may get called on the goofs. It might be easiest to have the MC enter a caveat on one of the early pages.
~~In my opinion, avoid accents. They're usually awful.

Amy Greene's Bloodroot is doing just fine, and is being compared to The Color Purple.

Dialect is best left at an impression of dialect.

What I mean is, give your readers the flavor of the dialect... not the whole 1500 calorie meal. A story that reads like this:

"Yer man done gone out an' had' 'im a goodun with that thar neighbor lady down yonder. Rollin' in the hay, squealin' like two hogs in heat. And he do know betta. That woman ain't but barely one as it is and him a full grown man with little'uns of his own. I dun thought he were gonna die of a heart attack 'afore they got dun."

... that's far too over done. Flavor your dialog with the dialect, never in the narrative. Especially in first person. People do not write the way they speak. If you read my forum posts then talked to me on the phone, you would never, ever equate my speaking voice with my AW handle. I'm about the biggest hick you'd ever hear - not Southern, not country... pure 100% hick. When writing dialect, be sure for one, that it all matches, for another, that you sprinkle it in. Don't write every word this way. The above passage is annoying. Read it again, and then read this next one.

"Your man's done gone and had a good lay with one of the neighbor ladies down yonder. Heard 'em squealing like hogs in heat, rolling around in the hay wagon like teens. At his age, he should know better. That woman is still mostly girl and he's a grown man with kids. I thought he was gonna have a heart-attack before they were done."

The one thing about dialect that most writers never get is that it's as much about how the sentences are constructed as it is the words they use. A southern style construction can flavor the words (if you are going for a southern impression, these are just examples) far better than writing out the word phonetically. Using certain words the same way every time they are encountered (say, for instance, using gonna instead of going to) helps. Most of all, please, please, please use dialect sparingly. With a deft hand. Flavor instead of over-power. Too much salt can ruin a good meal.

EFCollins said:

A southern style construction can flavor the words (if you are going for a southern impression, these are just examples) far better than writing out the word phonetically.

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Although it's a bit of a digression from the original, I'd like to add that the way English is spelt is so different to the pronunciation, you might find even if you spell something the way you think it sounds, other people (especially from other countries) will probably interpret it differently. Also, although the consonants are more obvious, accents differ more in the vowels, and if you really wanted to ‘flavor’ a word, it might be easier to recognize a word with the wrong vowel than one with the wrong consonant.

The problem with dialect or any sort of nonstandard English is that it is likely to irritate rather than intrigue the reader. That does not mean you have to make your teenager sound like Lord Chesterfield, but don't go so deeply into teenspeak that the reader is going to go "Huh?"
And why would anyone, teenager or no, say "slayed"? It would just jolt the reader out of the story.

AVbd said:

Although it's a bit of a digression from the original, I'd like to add that the way English is spelt is so different to the pronunciation, you might find even if you spell something the way you think it sounds, other people (especially from other countries) will probably interpret it differently. Also, although the consonants are more obvious, accents differ more in the vowels, and if you really wanted to ‘flavor’ a word, it might be easier to recognize a word with the wrong vowel than one with the wrong consonant.

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Just for clarity: I did not mean the construction of the words. I meant sentence construction is different in the deep South of the USA and in many dialects of the world; the structure of the sentence can flavor the words with the dialect more than spelling out the actual dialect in the words indivudally. And when I said spell it phonetically, that is how many writers spell the dialect version of words... how the speaker says them with the accent. Stephen King does this is many, many of his books with those Maine versions of words. "Uh-huh" is "Ayuh" and etc.

@Elindson: I write using dialect quite a bit and rarely is it a problem. I've had lots of compliments on how well I use different dialects. The only time it ever has become a problem is when the speaker is a child... I often times end up muddling dialects in children with baby talk LOL!

Have you ever read Huckleberry Finn? Grammar in first person is always the grammar of the POV character.

What you can't do in first person, or any other POV, if use bad grammar accidentally. Everything is written just as that character would say it. First person is all dialogue, even the narrative, and you can do anything you want with the grammar, as long as you're absolutely true to the character's voice.

But mistakes by the writer are still mistakes by the writer. You have to use poor grammar when and where the character would use it, not where the writer doesn't know the difference.

But go very, very, very light on spelling anything phonetically. All this usually does is annoy the heck out of readers. Word choice, sentence structure, cadence, and rhythm are how you write first person effectively.

Ayuh may have started as a phonetic spelling of uh-huh, but it no longer is, and it isn't accent. Ayuh is now an actual word, a regionally different word, that means the same thing as "yes".

This is real dialect. . .different words that mean the same thing, but that are regional words, not national words, and this is what separates good dialogue from bad. Too much phonetic spelling kills. Actual regional words add flavor and verisimilitude.

Jamesaritchie said:

Have you ever read Huckleberry Finn? Grammar in first person is always the grammar of the POV character.

What you can't do in first person, or any other POV, if use bad grammar accidentally. Everything is written just as that character would say it. First person is all dialogue, even the narrative, and you can do anything you want with the grammar, as long as you're absolutely true to the character's voice.

But mistakes by the writer are still mistakes by the writer. You have to use poor grammar when and where the character would use it, not where the writer doesn't know the difference.

But go very, very, very light on spelling anything phonetically. All this usually does is annoy the heck out of readers. Word choice, sentence structure, cadence, and rhythm are how you write first person effectively.

Ayuh may have started as a phonetic spelling of uh-huh, but it no longer is, and it isn't accent. Ayuh is now an actual word, a regionally different word, that means the same thing as "yes".

This is real dialect. . .different words that mean the same thing, but that are regional words, not national words, and this is what separates good dialogue from bad. Too much phonetic spelling kills. Actual regional words add flavor and verisimilitude.

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Yes! That's exactly what I was trying to say.

As JAR says, don't muck around with the spelling. That just makes the reading difficult. Use the grammar and vocabulary that is true to your story, and make it readable.

For instance, I'm inclined to say "awright" and "awready" -- but to spell that way would just be a distraction, even to me.

Some readers, I think, will resist non-standard English, and I say they lose by cutting themselves off for such poor reasons. Have they such a narrow view of language? They're trying to reinforce something that, imo, doesn't count. They're trying to read a different story, for their own reasons.

elindson said:

Thanks. My MC is a teen, so I'm mostly talking about "He was slayed" instead of slain. When I went back through it, it only popped up maybe 3x per chapter....

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I have a feeling that is correct anyway (assuming you meant he was overwhelmed with something and not murdered). At worst, it is slang, rather than being a dialect or grammatically incorrect.

Be true to your character by showing how they speak. However, know our grammar rules so you know when you are breaking them to retain the voice of your character.

I agree with not writing phonetically, thought. That can be downright irritating.

The book PUSH by Sapphire which became the move precious is written in horrible English. It won a lot of awards and captured a lot of people's hearts. It was hard to read, because of the dialect, but I loved it.