DIALOGUE

There are some things that are more or less universal, others that can be handled in more than one way.

One thing to do is to look at books, esp the ones you admire, from different publishing houses. Read pages of dialogue, and take note not of whether it's good or bad, but simply how the dialogue is formatted. You'll find many different ways, as well as things that are relatively consistent across the board.

That's basically how I learned, years ago.

You would only start a new para if the character says/does nothing more, or a new speaker says something.

'I know,' he said. 'I thought the same myself.'

'I know,' he said.
'You don't act like it.' She pinched the bridge of her nose. 'Can you try?'


'I know,' he said. With a brief prayer, he pulled out the shotgun and aimed. If I'm lucky, I'll get his brains on the plastic not the carpet.

Like Rugcat said, study published books.

Aw, it's not that hard.

When Character A talks, his dialogue and any actions he performs or thoughts he has go in one (or more) paragraph(s), depending on how long he goes on and what else he does or thinks. It would be perfectly correct to write:

"I know," he said. What time was dinner, anyway? He was probably running late. But he had to be polite. This woman could end up being his boss. He smiled, hoping she didn't spot it as false. "Oh, believe me, I know!" In truth, he did know. Had been there a thousand times. But it wouldn't do to share that, at least not yet.

Character B's response, reaction, actions, or thoughts always go in a separate paragraph from the paragraph containing Character A’s dialogue.

That's all the rule there is. Easy-peasy, yes?

Maryn, the great simplifier

Maryn said:

Aw, it's not that hard.

When Character A talks, his dialogue and any actions he performs or thoughts he has go in one (or more) paragraph(s), depending on how long he goes on and what else he does or thinks. It would be perfectly correct to write:

"I know," he said. What time was dinner, anyway? He was probably running late. But he had to be polite. This woman could end up being his boss. He smiled, hoping she didn't spot it as false. "Oh, believe me, I know!" In truth, he did know. Had been there a thousand times. But it wouldn't do to share that, at least not yet.

Character B's response, reaction, actions, or thoughts always go in a separate paragraph from the paragraph containing Character A’s dialogue.

That's all the rule there is. Easy-peasy, yes?

Maryn, the great simplifier

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What about passages which open with dialogue from A, then have several paragraphs of exposition, then continues with A speaking again. New paragraph?

How about this:

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.”

Sherwood shuddered delicately.

“How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.


Or this:

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.” Sherwood shuddered delicately.

“How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.

Or this:

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.”

Sherwood shuddered delicately. “How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.

Subtle differences. Is there a simple rule that applies?

rugcat said:

Is there a simple rule that applies?

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House style?

ETA: Personally I'd put it in all one para if it's the same person doing and speaking. But that's a) me and b) might get changed, depending.

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.”Sherwood shuddered delicately. “How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.

rugcat said:

What about passages which open with dialogue from A, then have several paragraphs of exposition, then continues with A speaking again. New paragraph?

How about this:

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.”

Sherwood shuddered delicately.

“How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.

Click to expand...

If Sherwood is not the one speaking, his reaction cannot be in the same paragraph as any dialogue spoken by someone else. So yes, three paragraphs. That's in the rule I noted originally.

Or this:

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.” Sherwood shuddered delicately.

“How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.

Click to expand...

This is not correct even if Sherwood is shuddering at his own words. (Then it could all be in one paragraph, with the resumption of his dialogue.)

Or this:

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.”

Sherwood shuddered delicately. “How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.

Subtle differences. Is there a simple rule that applies?

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Yes, the same rule. Which, if any, of the dialogue does Sherwood say? His shudder can only go in the same paragraph as his words. If someone else is speaking, his shudder cannot go in their dialogue paragraph.

This is what I said originally. It's still correct:

When Character A talks, his dialogue and any actions he performs or thoughts he has go in one (or more) paragraph(s), depending on how long he goes on and what else he does or thinks. Character B's response, reaction, actions, or thoughts always go in a separate paragraph from the paragraph containing Character A’s dialogue.

I'll go so far as to say the examples are all pretty confusing, although perhaps in context it's clear who's talking. But taken as presented, the first example has someone other than Sherwood speaking both lines of dialogue. The second has Sherwood speaking the first line but not the second--I think. And the third has Sherwood speaking the second line but not the first, all because his shudder can only be in the paragraph with dialogue which is his.

Maryn

The main objective is clarity so the reader can follow who is saying or doing what. You may know, but you must make sure the reader knows.

A good rule of thumb is same character-same paragraph. New character-new paragraph.

Maryn said:

If Sherwood is not the one speaking, his reaction cannot be in the same paragraph as any dialogue spoken by someone else. So yes, three paragraphs. That's in the rule I noted originally...

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I should have provided a longer section for context.

But you can find all three methods used in numerous books.

I wonder if this might help? I'm going to ignore the issues of dialogue and go to the basics: what is a paragraph. After all, dialogue is (or should be) part of a paragraph.

Simple definition: A paragraph is a group of related sentences. It might include just 1 sentence. Most writers separate paragraphs by a beginning indentation, or a line break, or both.

Important qualities for effective paragraphs:
1. the para must keep to one main idea -- sometimes called unity.

2. the sentences must relate to each other -- coherence.

3. the main idea should be supported by additional facts, details, reasons, or examples -- development.

(I could go on but you'll be relieved to learn that I'm stopping here.)

It is axiomatic that to be effective, your dialogue needs to be a contributing element in a paragraph. Perhaps by following these "rules" (hate that word) you can see ways in which your dialogue and narration can fit together.

Fairies wear bOOts:) said:

Does anyone have a really good website for dialogue FORMATTING.

I'm starting to notice trends in books where you can't continue on in the same paragraph after,

"I know," he said.
(You then have to start a new paragraph).

Along with other things like this...

I never cared before, but now that I'd like to be a writer I'm trying to learn.

Does anyone know of a good source? Thank you!

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Oh, God, I loathe this! It makes you have to figure out all over again who is speaking. I've seen it a lot, and I think of it as a mistake, pure and simple. If it's some new twist of style, I hope it untwists soon.

rugcat said:

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.”

Sherwood shuddered delicately.

“How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.

Click to expand...

This reads as sherwood could be either speaker or a third party.

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.” Sherwood shuddered delicately.

“How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.

Click to expand...

This reads as sherwood is speaker 1 and a second character is replying.

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.”

Sherwood shuddered delicately. “How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.

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This reads as sherwood replying to character 1's statement.

By putting the name in the paragraph, the reader will associate the action with the speaker. When a new character is responding or the action in the narrative goes to a new character, start a new paragraph. It limits confusion and makes the text much more easily read.

And a quick edit. I forgot a fourth option:

“The brains. It cracks open the head and sucks out the brain tissue, leaving an empty skull.” Sherwood shuddered delicately. “How delightful. But however it does it, it can then replicate its victim right down to the last detail. Appearance, memories, skills—in essence, it can become its victim.

The entire thing is one person speaking and acting.

I haven't seen it in any books, but I seldom read electronic fiction, self-published books, or very far into books written with glaringly poor mechanics, such as the first Meyer novels.

The "rule" to make each line of dialog a new paragraph regardless of the speaker isn't a rule (like so many other made-up rules). As many have pointed out, it violates the rule of paragraph integrity and causes confusion.

Yep, we should only isolate dialog when it changes from one speaker to another.

Fairies wear bOOts:) said:

. . . Does anyone know of a good source? Thank you!

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Not a real response, but probably of considerable related interest, the chapter (5) on Dialogue in Oakley Hall's How Fiction Works. Some of the examples are startling in their defiance of the conventions. (Regarding one example, the author notes, "who is speaking is perfectly clear." Mmmm no. Not really.)

--Ken