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Paradis
06-13-2010, 05:29 AM
So I'm looking for ways shave off some material from my Comedy Script right now, as it still too long.

One area I've thought of re-imaging is a sequence near the start that goes through the generic flashbacks of the main characters upbringing. Simply put, there's roughly 3 or 4 short sequences that bring the audience up to speed on how this character became the way he is.

What i've considered is portraying those moments as stills or photographs that capture the central moment. Now I'm not actually sure this will crop down the script significantly at all, just something i'm entertaining.

Anyone have any experience using this approach? how did you write it? Is this even something we as screenplay writers even have control over? Any thoughts and comments are welcome of course.

mario_c
06-13-2010, 06:53 AM
It's similar to a montage, except it's just using freeze frames. I have to say the first movie that comes to mind using this kind of a sequence is Superfly :D as well as most of the better crime dramas (The Wire, for example) to indicate surveillance of the villains by the "man".

WriteKnight
06-13-2010, 07:29 AM
SERIES OF STILLS:
Johnny as a baby, naked on a twister board
Johnny as a toddlerr, holding a shotgun
Johnny as a preteen dressed in Klan regalia
Johnny as a teenager dressed in bondage gear
Johnny as a young man. An ordained priest.


Something like that?

Paradis
06-13-2010, 11:31 AM
^ well the problem is there's voice over thats happening that has to be there. so that have to present while the audience sits through several seconds of the photo, which was primarily the reason i've never went with the idea in the first place

i dunno, maybe i need to look elswhere

Verbal
06-13-2010, 06:09 PM
SERIES OF STILLS:
Johnny as a baby, naked on a twister board
Johnny as a toddlerr, holding a shotgun
Johnny as a preteen dressed in Klan regalia
Johnny as a teenager dressed in bondage gear
Johnny as a young man. An ordained priest.


Something like that?

*busting out laughing*

Too funny!

Is your VO talking directly to the audience like in Goodfellas? Because you could have the VO talk about the photos.

NARRATOR (V.O.)
Here's a shot of me sitting on the john with a dunce cap. 3 years old, and my parents humiliated me because I wet the bed.

Still of Narrator, 6 years old, with a bloody knife and severed human head.

NARRATOR (V.O.) (Cont.)
I guess you could say it was all down hill from there.


Best of luck with it!