Help! Lists in YA...

DrummerGirl · Jan 5, 2010

Hey,

I am in the final stages of editing my contemp YA. I am having a few qualms about my opening chapter. It's causing me some serious grief!

First off: MY MS opens with a prologue (I know, I know - sin number one

.) In the prologue (800 words) the MC is scarred in an institution, following a tragedy involving her best friend and boyfriend. It hints at their deaths. The actual story opening begins 3 months before, with chapters counting down the days.

So, Chapter one: The MC and her BF are chilling at a park. both write a list of 'Things To Do Before I turn 18.'

The lists are point form, but are needed for later on in the story (when various things do/don't happen.) They also show a bit about both chicks personalities. Oh, and later on a love interest finds the written list which several scenes rely on...

Here's the thing: have read (on Absolute Write somewhere... and on an agents blog) a list

of top ten things agents hate in YA novels. Yep, lists is on there.

I cannot forget that I read this, and keep cringing when I think of my first chapter...

What do you think?
Ditch it and try to think of a way around it?
Move the lists to a chapter further back? - dont want to turn of agents straight away.
Or am I stressing about nothing?
Any thoughts are greatly appreciated

inkspatters · Jan 5, 2010

I think it depends on the way you use the lists to be honest, and since I haven't seen your lists I wouldn't know what advice to give you. What I would steer clear off is the chatty Meg Cabot style list (she can pull them off and just about no one else can, and too many people try to pull them off). But if lists are a part of your story, they're a part of your story, use them if they're appropriate.

seeAlliwrite · Jan 5, 2010

Hmmm. Tough one. Lists are definitely quite chick-lit old-school in style, though. How about if you wrote it as a conversation instead?

Danthia · Jan 5, 2010

I don't see a problem with the list if the story is good. Lists might be cliche, but cliches can work if done well. If it's true to the story and it works, great. Don't worry about it.

I would, however, rethink the prologue. Totally my opinion here, ignore if it you wish, but scenes that tell or hint at something important down the road usually steal all the tension away from a story. If readers know what's going to happen, they'll spend the time waiting for it instead of getting immersed in the tale itself and wondering what will happen.

DrummerGirl · Jan 5, 2010

hey guys

thanks so much for your posts. You all made good comments. Theres so much stuff to consider...

I think I am going to brainstorm on the plot points that rely on the written lists and see if there is a more dynamic way to weave them into the story...

Danthia - Thank you. Yeah, I guess I am a little scared of ditching the prologue as that began as the whole premise of the book... but, I think you may be right (sigh...

)

I really do need to face the little parts that niggle at me - but pulling one idea/scene is like pulling a thread, and the rest of the story goes a bit kinky.

Tuuli · Jan 5, 2010

Before I Die had a list and it worked. It just depends how you do it. But Danthia's right. It might be clinche, especially if it's a 'before I die' list.

Sounds like you're doing a frame story. I'm using the same type of start for my next book. It's the only way I can introduce the story problem, otherwise you have to wait until 2/3 of the way into the story. But in my situation, it works. It depends how you do it, I suppose.

bobcat22 · Jan 5, 2010

I had a bunch of mixed genres in the first draft of my book (poems, lists, diary entries...). I worked with my Creative Writing professor on it, and he gave me some great advice. He told me you can do anything in a book along as you make it necessary. What he meant is that you can include the list, but it has to play a big role in the story. Ask yourself if it was removed (or revealed in a different way) would the story be the same. If you answer no and make it important and needed in the plot, then you can get away with it. In the words of Tim Gund..."Make it work!"

DrummerGirl · Jan 7, 2010

Tuuli, that frame stuf is really interesting. I wiki-ed it

Yeah, the lists in before I die are gradual, the MC metioning a new thing from it as the novel progresses. you're so right about the cliche... really working on trying to get the right balance - an original.

bobcat, your story sounds cool. and good advice ofr novels overall - in editing I keep asking: do I need this scene? how can I make it stronger, etc.

Thanks for all you comments guys, it's helped get me thinking -

Tuuli · Jan 12, 2010

Drummergirl, if you want to check out a book that is a frame story, read 13 Reasons Why by Jay Asher.

shaldna · Jan 13, 2010

can I ask why you need a prologue?

I personally hate them. Especially when they are used for dramatic effect because the actual opening of the story isn't strong enough.

Worse still is when they mislead the reader. If I read a prologue that's a scene further on, and it changes or tells me lies then I as a reader feel cheated.

Good examples of a sort of prologue can be found in alot of Terry Pratchetts work. They are 'disguised' as starts of the book, and they usually contain characters who are not main characters in the book. And It will say something like 'That was then'

Help! Lists in YA...

DrummerGirl

Capturing the Castle

inkspatters

The coordinates keep changing...

seeAlliwrite

Danthia

DrummerGirl

Capturing the Castle

Tuuli

Research Addict

bobcat22

DrummerGirl

Capturing the Castle

Tuuli

Research Addict

shaldna

The cake is a lie. But still cake.