How typical are my experiences?

The Otter · Dec 30, 2009

About a year ago, I got an agent for the first time. Though I don’t want to mention the name here, I’d like to make it clear that this is someone legit and well-respected, an AAR member who has been in the business for many years and is also a respected editor.

Suffice to say, my experience been nothing at all like what I imagined having an agent would be like. First of all, her only contact with me has been through e-mail (no phone), which wouldn’t be a big deal, except that there’ve been long stretches of time—three months or longer—when she hasn’t contacted me at all. Of course I don’t expect an agent to be in touch with me every day or even every week, but I expected more communication than this. And on those occasions she did contact me, it was usually only a brief note to tell me who had rejected my book.

Maybe the lack of communication is my fault. Maybe I should have been more proactive and asked more questions. But I’m new to this, so I don’t know what’s appropriate or what I’m supposed to do, and I didn't want to pester her with unnecessary questions. I always assumed that the agent would sort of take the lead when it came to communications.

Another issue…the nature of our contract is that she automatically represents all my full-length works. I have two other novels, aside from the one I sent her and which she accepted. This means, essentially, that I can’t do anything with these other two novels, or any others I might write, while she’s my agent. This wouldn’t be an issue if she were actually sending them out. But she hasn’t done so. During the year she’s been my agent, she has only sent out the one novel she initially accepted. As far as I know, she has not even read the other two yet. She initially asked me to send hard copies of them to her, so I went to the trouble and expense to print out two copies and mail them to her. For awhile I didn’t hear back from her about that, and when I finally asked about the manuscripts, she said she’d “lost them” and asked me to just send them to her as files. So I did. This was over a month ago. I sent her an e-mail a week ago asking if she’d started reading them yet and haven’t received a response (though that could be because it’s the holiday break). This is frustrating to me because I feel like she’s just been sitting on those manuscripts the whole time, and my hands are tied because I’m contractually bound not to submit them anywhere myself.

It could be that my expectations were completely naïve and unrealistic. I'm not even sure what my expectations were, really. But I thought having an agent would involve more than this. Of course, I have not been doing nothing with this time. I’ve spent it writing another book, one which is hopefully better than any of my previous ones. At the same time, I’m feeling vaguely disenchanted with the whole experience. I guess what I want to know is…how typical is my experience? Is this pretty much just how things are with an agent nowadays?

Thanks.

jclarkdawe · Dec 30, 2009

Is your book being submitted to top editors who are giving proper consideration to your book?

Or do you want hand holding?

To me, only the first question matters.

I would want an answer to her opinion on the other two manuscripts, but I'm going to guess she doesn't like them.

Best of luck,

Jim Clark-Dawe

The Otter · Dec 30, 2009

So I'm guessing your answer to my question is, "Yes, this is normal."

As to your first question, the answer is, I hope so. But how do I know? If wanting more communication on what's happening with my book constitutes "hand-holding," then yes, I guess I want that. I feel very much left in the dark.

Also, if she doesn't like my other two books I wish she'd just tell me that. But my impression is that she hasn't read them yet.

ChaosTitan · Dec 30, 2009

Honestly, your experience seems to fall somewhere in the middle. I don't know that there is a "typical" experience. Mostly it depends on your needs. Not every agent is the right fit for every writer. There are members here who have had more than one, and I can name at least one best-selling author who changed agents because it wasn't working, personality-wise, with her old agent.

There's more to an author-agent relationship than money, and there can be a happy medium between hand-holding and being ignored. This is someone who is representing your career. Losing two manuscripts is pretty unprofessional.

How many editors have read your book in a year? How aggressive is your agent in selling you? It's not atypical to be on submission for a year or more, but you should never be afraid to ask your agent what's going on--and a professional agent will tell you when you ask.

The Otter · Dec 30, 2009

ChaosTitan said:
How many editors have read your book in a year? How aggressive is your agent in selling you?

I don't know. And that's the crux of my problem, I guess; I don't feel like I have any clue what's going on or any way of knowing whether my book's getting good representation. I asked her recently for a list of the publishers she's submitted to...hopefully I'll get a response on that soon and that will give me a better idea.

ChaosTitan · Dec 30, 2009

The Otter said:
I asked her recently for a list of the publishers she's submitted to...hopefully I'll get a response on that soon and that will give me a better idea.

And you are absolutely entitled to see this list. I'm grateful my agent provided me with the list of publishers before he submitted. I knew where my manuscript was going. I can't begin to imagine how frustrating it is to have seen a year go by with no idea who's even reading it.

AryaT92 · Dec 30, 2009

Not typical but not rare, really depends on the agent.. Communication is key, I wouldn't be able to live with an agent who didn't keep me in the loop.

kellion92 · Dec 30, 2009

Hi Otter. I can't tell you how typical your experience is, but there have been other writers here who have felt ignored by their agents. I agree with Chaos that losing the manuscripts is unprofessional. Your agent may not have given them top priority since it seems as if most agents submit one book per client at a time, but still, you should be able to get some direction and plan a strategy for revising, submitting, or trunking them, as the case may be.

I have also heard a lot of writers let their agents take the lead on communications and then be disappointed that they don't heard much. But your agent may think you're perfectly satisfied since s/he hasn't heard from YOU. I contact my agent when I want to hear from her -- I'm not a nag about it, but if I don't hear from her after three weeks or a month, I drop her a note asking for a status.

There do seem to be quite a few agents that don't share submissions lists as readily as others, and there are some that share them in advance to ask for feedback. If you want this list, you should have it. If you want to discuss future submissions strategies for the book on sub and others, you should initiate that discussion.

Old Hack · Dec 31, 2009

If you're not happy with the way things are going you can always let your agent know your concerns, and ask what's happening and what his or her plan is for your writing. You can do this without seeming confrontational or critical: it would clear the air, and let you know what's going on behind the scenes.

You could also get hold of a copy of Carole Blake's "From Pitch to Publication" which describes the agent's job in close detail: I found it very illuminating.

peyton67 · Dec 31, 2009

Hi, Otter. Before publishing my novels, I had a similar experience with my agent. As a newbie, or just eager writer, I asked lots of questions. Some of the questions I asked after gathering some not so good information here on AW. As a result, my agent let me go. This was fine with me. Like any relationship, communication is key- and extremely individual. If you are not satisfied with the level of communication, this isn't the agent for you- whether they're shopping your novel to major houses or not.

Best of luck!

jclarkdawe · Dec 31, 2009

I intentionally wanted to go to extremes to get you thinking about what you need in this relationship. Because guess what? There's nothing wrong with needing hand holding.

Here's my relationship with my agent. All communication is by email, but I haven't felt a need to talk to her. I'm comfortable doing business this way.

Editorial comments on a whole book will be one or two sentences. She figures I know enough to figure out how to fix it. Makes me work harder at thinking through my problems.

Two books she rejected. One based on the query because she thinks it's too long for YA (I agree, but it isn't YA). The other because the book sucked. Both were fairly prompt. But my guess in your case is your agent isn't in love with the other books based on the query and wants to hold back on deciding until she sees how your first book goes. That's hard to explain to someone.

I haven't communicated with my agent since August. Then again, I've had nothing, and I'm presuming she's had nothing, to say. I'm doing a rewrite and until it's done, there's no need to communicate. While she was submitting, she'd always let me know about the rejections and usually about the submission.

Her approach works for me. I looked up the editors she submitted to, so I know the quality of her contacts. I don't need hand holding, so I'm fine with her hands off approach. But will this work for everyone? Hell, no.

What you need to think through is what you like and don't like about the relationship. Think about how important each of the aspects are. (And for some people the hand holding is as important as the quality of the submissions.) Then carefully construct an email expressing this. Start with the positive and try not to make the negative high. Don't whine. Find out if this is a work style difference that is easily addressed, or whether you two can never work together happily. Decide approximately where your bottom line is. And try to present alternative theories. For example, think through why she might not have commented on your manuscripts and move beyond the "she's bad and lazy because she hasn't looked at them."

Once you get the email written, sit on it for at least a couple of days and then look at it again.

Best of luck,

Jim Clark-Dawe

Jamesaritchie · Dec 31, 2009

An agent should let you know who a novel is being submitted to, and should periodically let you know how many have rejected it. She should also let you know the status of any other novels you have with her.

But any good agent has a LOT of clients, and spends 98% of her time dealing with publishers, contracts, etc. If there is nothing new for her to tell you, why should she waste what little time she has telling you anything?

If there's something you really need to know, send her an e-mail, or make a phone call. But by and large, the agent's job is to sell your book, not to talk to you unless there's a strong business reason for doing so.

The Otter · Dec 31, 2009

Thanks, all. I'll take all this into consideration when I e-mail her again. I wish I had asked more questions in the beginning--I would have loved to have a list of everyone she was planning to submit to--but I was worried about seeming too demanding.

And jc--I never accused her of being lazy. I was annoyed that she lost my manuscripts because that's money out of my pocket that I won't get back, but I've been giving her the benefit of the doubt because she IS legit and (I assume) knows what she's doing. But if it's really the case that she just doesn't like the other books or doesn't think they can be sold, I'd rather know that right off the bat instead of having to ask her multiple times if she's read them yet (though she did say she was "interested" in one of them based on my description of it, so who knows...) I don't think that's too much to ask for.

nighttimer · Jan 11, 2010

The Otter said:
As to your first question, the answer is, I hope so. But how do I know? If wanting more communication on what's happening with my book constitutes "hand-holding," then yes, I guess I want that. I feel very much left in the dark.

Also, if she doesn't like my other two books I wish she'd just tell me that. But my impression is that she hasn't read them yet.

Tom Petty sang, "the waiting is the hardest part." I would add that dead silence kind of grinds the nerves too.

At this point the questions I'd have to ask is:

Do I trust my agent?

If the answer is "no," then you know what to do next: Ask the agent to return your submissions and start all over.

Of course, if you do there's no telling when you will find another agent or how long you'll have to search until you do. But if you don't trust your agent to represent your interests, then it's not really a tough call. Both parties need to be "all-in" throughout the process or they should be "all-out." I don't think it's wanting to do much to ask for an agent to believe in your book as much as you do.

But if the answer is "yes, I do trust this agent," then the question becomes:

Am I being a high-maintenance, pain-in-the-neck, prima donna?

Short answer? Probably. You don't understand how the publishing game is played and how time is regarded differently in their world than yours. One of my favorite books about publishing is 78 Reasons Why Your Book May Never Be Published (and 14 Reasons Why It Might) by Pat Ross. Ross is unsentimential and blunt about how authors sabotage their own books and the lack of patience is high among the contributing factors.

Many people who might otherwise be published aren't because they're in too much of a hurry. They submit too early because they just cannot stand to wait any longer. They give in to enthusiasm and angst at the expense of considerate care... No single thing gets me more excited about reading a manuscript than being told it took the writer ten years to finish the book. Great writing takes time.

You should not fret if the agent reading your manuscript hasn't returned your phone calls or e-mails. Odds aren't she isn't returning anybody else's either. Silence should not be confused with disinterest or inactivity.

It's natural to think like a protective parent and wonder if your little darling is safe in the care of a total stranger. But you have to check yourself due to the risk of being an overprotective parent. I agree you have the right to expect an agent to keep you informed of the status of your submission. But when you queried the agent and they asked for the submission were there any stipulations provided on how long the review process would take? If there wasn't any timeline given, did you ask how long it would be?

And most agents aren't going to hold your hand no matter how much you might think they should. They don't have the interest and they don't have the time. It's not their job to reassure you they love you and have been thinking about you. It's their job to represent your and navigate the maze that leads to your book getting published. Once that's taken care of there will be plenty of opportunities for dinner and drinks. Right now, you're a client, not a friend.

Take a walk. Go work out. Write something. Just don't obsess over the state of your submission because you might not like the answer to the questions you keep turning over in your mind.

flyingtart · Jan 11, 2010

nighttimer said:
One of my favorite books about publishing is 78 Reasons Why Your Book May Never Be Published (and 14 Reasons Why It Might) by Pat Ross.

I love this book too, nighttimer, but it's written by Pat Walsh.

CAWriter · Jan 11, 2010

Whether your experience is typical or not, I think your feelings are. I know several agents and have heard their frustrations when an author is feeling this way but they don't know it. I agree with the previous poster who said your agent may think things are fine because they haven't heard from you.

My suggestion would be when you email next, ask for a phone call. As in, "I'd love to have a conversation to talk about these additional projects and talk through where we go from here and what I should be doing next." Approach her from a collegial, "we're on the same team" perspective. I've been in your boat and have been surprised how quickly those insecurities or misunderstandings can be cleared up in just a few minutes over the phone.

I know all too well the desire not to be a 'pest.' It's ok to initiate enough communication to keep you from feeling like you've dropped of her radar altogether though.

lilacat · Jan 11, 2010

You all have so many good things to say, I thought I'd post (for the first time) on this topic. I signed with my agent in October and I have sent a few nudges to ask where we are in the submission process. It's January, now and I still have not seen a list--thoughin her last email (November 18), she said she was going to find three publishers for submission. No word on who they might be, though. Today I sent a little nudge for news. I'm feeling a bit of panic, also fear of being too high-maintenance. I feel like a new girlfriend, in a relationship she wants to blossom, but one she has no idea how to manage.

How long do we wait before we say this new relationship isn't working?

The Otter · Jan 11, 2010

nighttimer said:
At this point the questions I'd have to ask is:

Do I trust my agent?

I don't really know how to answer that question. She has good credentials. Does that make an agent trustworthy?

nighttimer said:
But if the answer is "yes, I do trust this agent," then the question becomes:

Am I being a high-maintenance, pain-in-the-neck, prima donna?

Short answer? Probably.

Because I asked a question on a forum? Really?

nighttimer said:
Silence should not be confused with disinterest or inactivity.

In that case, what WOULD be a sign of disinterest or inactivity?

nighttimer said:
It's not their job to reassure you they love you and have been thinking about you.

Good thing that's not what I want or what I asked for.

nighttimer said:
It's their job to represent your and navigate the maze that leads to your book getting published. Once that's taken care of there will be plenty of opportunities for dinner and drinks. Right now, you're a client, not a friend.

I'm not interested in dinner and drinks or friendship. I'm interested in getting my book published. Hearing nothing for long stretches of time makes me wonder if anything is happening, or if I've been forgotten or put on the back burner. Maybe that's not what it means, but then, that's why I'm seeking opinions here. But I don't think it's at all fair or reasonable to imply that asking these questions makes me a whiny prima donna who needs constant love and hand-holding. Asking questions is what responsible people do when they want to become informed. I'm asking here, in this forum, specifically because I DON'T want to take up any more of my agent's time than necessary. I've only asked her for basic information such as where my book is being submitted or where she plans to submit next.

veinglory · Jan 11, 2010

One thing to pursue might be a clear yes or no on your other two novels. It is easier to be patient with the one she is/may be submitting if she will release the other two for you to submit elsewhere. It seems to me (as a non-expert) that just like a publisher the manuscript should be picked up, or returned to you--not left in limbo.

It also occurs to me that she should be able to say where the manuscript she is representing has or will be submitted.

Just my 2c but these seem like reasonable things for a client to know.

The Otter · Jan 11, 2010

CAWriter said:
My suggestion would be when you email next, ask for a phone call. As in, "I'd love to have a conversation to talk about these additional projects and talk through where we go from here and what I should be doing next." Approach her from a collegial, "we're on the same team" perspective. I've been in your boat and have been surprised how quickly those insecurities or misunderstandings can be cleared up in just a few minutes over the phone.

I know all too well the desire not to be a 'pest.' It's ok to initiate enough communication to keep you from feeling like you've dropped of her radar altogether though.

Thanks. I'm feeling a bit better, since I did get some additional information from her recently. I'm actually terrible on the phone (I stutter and always forget what I meant to ask unless I have it written down in front of me) so maybe it's just as well that there hasn't been any phone contact, heh.

cate townsend · Jan 13, 2010

Otter, agents do a tremendous service for writers, however, it seems that many writers forget that agents work for us. It's you who make them the money. Keep that in mind during your communication. You're in the position to make your concerns known, and should feel that your concerns deserve to be addressed.

As a consultant with clients, communication in my line of work is the utmost importance in maintaining a successful operation for both parties. If my client needs me, I'm there--period. It's not hand-holding. It's good business practice.

Good luck to you.

How typical are my experiences?

The Otter

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jclarkdawe

Feeling lucky, Query?

The Otter

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ChaosTitan

Around

The Otter

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ChaosTitan

Around

AryaT92

kellion92

A cat may not look at a king

Old Hack

Such a nasty woman

peyton67

jclarkdawe

Feeling lucky, Query?

Jamesaritchie

The Otter

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nighttimer

Am I Evil? Yes, I Am!

flyingtart

I don't have Tourettes, I just like swearing.

CAWriter

lilacat

The Otter

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veinglory

volitare nequeo

The Otter

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cate townsend