Author's Gender and POV Character's Gender

I admire you for writing in first person - what a challenge it must be! Or perhaps you are one of those people naturally gifted at it?

I usually write third person POV's, but introspections of male characters opposite my gender have emerged.

I would say the most important thing to remember is who your character is inside and out, that way you don't get lost in them or make them sound odd regardless of what gender they are.

There's a wide range of behavior within any gender, so even if your character is not a dead average male, the overwhelming majority of readers probably won't notice if you're not a member of that gender. (Gender studies specialists and a few other people might notice, but it won't be a problem.)

As long as you let them know up front the character's a male, few people will question it. (Hint: When in doubt, show the character is male very quickly. Don't wait a while into the book, or readers might form a view of your character as female first, then get jarred out of it when he is mentioned to be male.)

In general, you want to avoid completely laughable and ignorant descriptions of anatomy or how it works, but that usually only comes up in badly written sex scenes.

My advice? Write the character, not the gender.

willietheshakes said:

My advice? Write the character, not the gender.

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THIS

Hmm, I'm probably not the one to ask about this.

My current WIP is 1st person, and broken into 2 parts. The first half is a male MC, the second a female. I've noticed a marked difference between how I write each of them, which will only become more pronounced in edits. BUT I've made the female MC sound like she's in a romance novel, whereas the male MC sounds like he's in a thriller. There are elements of both thriller and romance to the story, but one takes precedence over the other for each MC.

And why did my FMC come out as romancey? Because, the only experience I have with consistent FMCs comes from romance types of books. It's true that most romances are written with the female character as MC, and so I didn't immediately go there with my MMC.

And then the fantasy/sci-fi which I normally read (excepting paranormal romance) has mostly MMCs, so in my thriller vein the MMC took point.

So basically, some people are going to yawn over my characters, because I was writing what I knew. The only realism that comes in seems to have been from the fact that most of my friends are women, and I'm male, so I have a bit of insight into each.

So the advice I would give is to make friends with a bunch of men, and try to understand them. If they do something typically male in front of you, ask them why they did that.

What to avoid in writing opposite gender? Well, I probably should've avoided having my FMC kissing guys, because now when my family reads the story they're going to look at me funny. (First person, remember, so it's all, "I pressed my lips to his and stroked his hair." And I'm not gay, so that could be awkward. Meanwhile, I had no trouble writing those scenes. It was under the impression that men and women, while acting differently in sexual situations, are still ultimately chasing the same goal of a pleasurable interlocking.)

I agree with willie.

But to expand on that a little, remember that gender roles are social constructs with little if any basis in biological fact, so you can form your character's psychology however you like. Primary and secondary sexual characteristics may not matter.

willietheshakes said:

My advice? Write the character, not the gender.

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QFT.

I write a lot of M/M erotic romance in first person. Once I let go of the thoughts of "OMG, I'm writing from a man's POV" and just wrote as a person, it really wasn't any different. Even the sex scenes.

Cliff Face said:

What to avoid in writing opposite gender? Well, I probably should've avoided having my FMC kissing guys, because now when my family reads the story they're going to look at me funny.

First person, remember, so it's all, "I pressed my lips to his and stroked his hair." And I'm not gay, so that could be awkward. Meanwhile, I had no trouble writing those scenes.

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I'm still waiting for my mom's reaction Rules of Engagement, my erotic M/M romance. She's reading it right now. LOL

In all seriousness, though, why avoid it? If you're writing from a woman's POV and she's kissing a man, well...that's her, not you. (though I will admit that it was a bit surreal the first time I wrote "my cock...")

I just remind people that I'm writing fiction. Just because I've written about it doesn't mean I've ever done it. I mean, I can say with 100% honesty that I've never participated in an all-male threesome, but I've written several. I have also written first person accounts of committing murder, giving birth, and eating 5-star Thai food, even though I myself have never done the first two and couldn't be paid enough to do the third. What my characters think, feel, say, and do, does not necessarily reflect what I think, feel, say, and do.

I did a lot of D&D type role-playing games before I started writing, and I played characters of both sexes (and a few who weren't even human, and one that could switch their sex), so that definitely helped me when it came to writing from the POV of the opposite gender.

It's true that the character, and not the gender, should come first...but their gender is a part of their character. Gender might be a social construct, but it affects everyone in some way. Something I would be aware of when writing in the opposite gender is to watch out for stereotypes and preconceived notions of what it means to be that gender. For example, if I wrote about a male POV character using power tools (or watching a sports game, etc.), I would need to make sure that I was still writing from that character's POV, and not my own ideas of how a guy would act in that situation.

Sevvy said:

I did a lot of D&D type role-playing games before I started writing, and I played characters of both sexes (and a few who weren't even human, and one that could switch their sex), so that definitely helped me when it came to writing from the POV of the opposite gender.

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Me too, I played World of Warcraft. I made a lot of characters of both genders and as I played the opposite gender I'd do my best to behave appropriately. I'd test my interactions with strangers. For example, while playing a male (I'm female in real life) I'd meet a couple of dudes and I would let them think they'd found a third "buddy". I got my mindset into being male. Of course, maybe they were pretending they were something they weren't in real life either. Ha ha.

There is a difference, whether it is social upbringing or genetic or hormonal, men and women think and behave differently, although I agree with the comment that they are more alike than different. The differences are subtle but they do exist. Here's an interesting new study:

http://health.usnews.com/articles/health/healthday/2009/12/08/testosterone-gets-bad-rap-study.html

You can use this method to "try out" more than just gender. As female characters in the game, I'd make one who was shy and prudish. Then I would make one who was a flirty tart. I would play the game along with the personality I had designed for that character. This experience "being" various personalities helps me tremendously get into the minds of my novel characters.

Speaking of World of Warcraft, I remember when an entire raid ground to a halt at the revelation that one of the raid members who had presented as female (both character and IRL) was actually male. Sad story. Even his in-game friends ridiculed him, so he quit the guild and switched servers.

willietheshakes said:

My advice? Write the character, not the gender.

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This.

Remember. There are more differences between individuals than there are between the genders.

A fellow AWer who shall remain anonymous told me once, "We're more alike than we are different."

As willietheshakes said, write the character, not the gender.

I just want to avoid that typical erotica "chicks with dicks" thing and I've been glad that a couple of guys who have read my M/M and M/F sex scenes for this book say they ring true.

Plus tt42 likes what I've written so far and that's the main thing.

I find it easier to write in the opposite gender POV (male) because it distances you from yourself. It means that you aren't just going to write a character which is a thinly veiled version of you and it helps you focus on what your character wants, not what you want.

Avoid the stereotypes. No groping and leering for men; no pouting and giggling for girls- unless this is part of their characters.
A lot of 1st person narrators in famous books are male so you can read them for tips.

SPMiller said:

Speaking of World of Warcraft, I remember when an entire raid ground to a halt at the revelation that one of the raid members who had presented as female (both character and IRL) was actually male. Sad story. Even his in-game friends ridiculed him, so he quit the guild and switched servers.

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Oh yeah, that's bad. I never joined a guild or played extensively with anyone under false pretenses. Just the temporary hookups.

the only experience I have with consistent FMCs comes from romance types of books.

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And then the fantasy/sci-fi which I normally read (excepting paranormal romance) has mostly MMCs, so in my thriller vein the MMC took point.

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I suggest widening your reading if the only SF you read is male oriented. You've never read Elizabeth Moon for instance, one of the best SF writers out there? There are dozens of others. There is something startling in someone saying they've only seen female MCs romances.

I write both. Frankly, there isn't a lot of difference in gender just in personality. If their personalities are formed in part by their gender that's something I'm not going to worry about.

Edit: How long did James Tiptree, Jr. write before people knew "he" was a woman? Years. She was compared to Hemingway for masculinity in spite of having a very feminist bent. Amusing.

Women have been building careers out of male characters for ages. And vice versa. One example that comes to mind is PD James - who wrote a very successful detective series about Adam Dalgleish.

For SF you can also read people like Mary Gentle, and Katherine Kerr, who write genre fiction from multiple gender viewpoints.

What others have said--write the character, not the gender.

If it's true to your character, it doesn't matter if it's true to his or her gender. Individuality trumps that.

thethinker42 said:

QFT.

I write a lot of M/M erotic romance in first person. Once I let go of the thoughts of "OMG, I'm writing from a man's POV" and just wrote as a person, it really wasn't any different. Even the sex scenes.

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*thinks of a certain conversation we've had*

Heh heh. Heh.

SPMiller said:

Speaking of World of Warcraft, I remember when an entire raid ground to a halt at the revelation that one of the raid members who had presented as female (both character and IRL) was actually male. Sad story. Even his in-game friends ridiculed him, so he quit the guild and switched servers.

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Someone playing a role-playing game and role-playing as someone they aren't IRL??? OMGZ!!

MMORPG = Many Men Online Role Playing Girls.

Maxinquaye said:

MMORPG = Many Men Online Role Playing Girls.

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lol

A characters gender has to be taken into account. While I agree the genders are more alike than not, gender still matters because in many cases it affects certain aspects of the characters habits, thoughts, and desires which should be appearant in the writing.

Piggybacking on the "write the character, not the gender" idea, I think what helps me the most is to figure out what my CHARACTER thinks about his or her gender. My current MC is male (I'm female) and he (not me) has a lot of very firm ideas about what it means to be "male." And he trashes himself when he doesn't live up to them.

So I think the most important thing is to figure out what your character feels the meaning of his or her gender is, and how this affects his/her actions.

Maxinquaye said:

MMORPG = Many Men Online Role Playing Girls.

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As a woman who used to do a fair amount of MMORPG playing that assumption used to rather get under my skin.

So I think the most important thing is to figure out what your character feels the meaning of his or her gender is, and how this affects his/her actions.

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I agree. How he or she feels about gender along with everything else. I often write about men to whom "manhood" (as they happen to define it) is rather important. That's just part of who they are.

Edit: it's not that they may not have different assumptions, but that I just write them as characters. I don't find one any harder to identify with than the other. Although occasionally I find a line that refers to my MC's "dangly bits" amusing to write. Childish I know.