How much conversation is too much?

Status
Not open for further replies.

Mara

Clever User Title
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Sep 21, 2009
Messages
1,961
Reaction score
343
Location
United States
My current (and first ever) WIP novel opens in a movie theater. A conversation is going on through most of the first 1500 words. There's body language, descriptions of other stuff going on in the theater, etc., not just stuff in quotations, but it's all related to the conversation.

I imagine there's going to be a lot of conversation in this novel, even though it's got some crazy action scenes. Is 1500 words of conversation too much? (This is after cutting any unnecessary chatter I could find.)

This scene is primarily romantic, and I think it gives a good intro to the personalities of several of the main characters. I can't really think of any other way to write it, other than to split up everything that's happening or cut a lot of the personality from the characters.

A major theme of the story is the contrast and relationship between the main character (lesbian and vampire, proud of both; decisive and outspoken) and supporting character (lesbian or bi-sexual, very closeted and repressed; indecisive and usually shy).

Here's what's going on. Is this too much conversation for one scene? (There is body language and such, not just spoken conversation. The POV is 1st person from MC, and includes her thoughts.)

-Introduces main character (female vampire, likes girls, prefers consensual blood sharing, non-lethal); establishes personality

-Introduces supporting character (female horror movie fan, likes girls, in the closet); establishes personality

-Establishes chemistry between the two; reinforces personalities; SC does not know anything about the vampire part though

-Gradually introduces MC as a vampire without infodumping; clarifies her personality

-Interruption; local conservative evangelist shows up and talks to supporting character; he used to be her pastor; he'll be an important character later. MC and SC's different reactions to him reinforce character.

-MC tries holding SC's hand; lasts about a minute, then SC reverses and claims to be straight; then gives awkward explanation. MC decides to go after preacher if she has to go for non-consensual blood. Reinforces personalities.

-MC defuses awkward situation, SC asks her out for a "non-date" the next day

-Scene ends
 
Last edited:

CheshireCat

Mostly purring. Mostly.
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jan 27, 2007
Messages
1,842
Reaction score
661
Location
Mostly inside my own head.
Yeah, don't count words when trying to determine when there's too much dialogue.

If the characters are saying interesting things, you're golden.

If you begin to be conscious of a conversation dragging on too long or not saying anything of interest, you've got Talking Head Syndrome, and need to break up the dialogue with something happening.

 

maestrowork

Fear the Death Ray
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 11, 2005
Messages
43,746
Reaction score
8,654
Location
Los Angeles
Website
www.amazon.com
I'm not concerned about the conversation.

I'm concerned about beginning the story with "a good intro to the personalities of several of the main characters." From your description, it seems like you're doing what a lot of new authors do: using the first chapter to "introduce" characters or back stories.

But...

Is there a plot? Are there going to be conflicts? Does this lead to the inciting incident that kicks off the story? Should I care about what these characters talk about?

More often than not, these writers realize they must cut that first chapter(s).

Without reading your ms. I can't tell.

But from personal experience, there's nothing duller than listening to a bunch of people talking for an hour just to see what they're like.
 

Mara

Clever User Title
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Sep 21, 2009
Messages
1,961
Reaction score
343
Location
United States
EDIT: Too long and tangential.

Yes, I came up with the plot and basic outline of events first, and the characters second. These aspects of the characters' personalities are central to the way the story unfolds; I'm not showing aspects of them that aren't relevant to the story yet. A lot of the plot happens specifically because the preacher sees the MC as "uppity" and "leading his flock to sexual immorality" and sees the SC as "weak-willed" and "needing his protection," and the initial conflict happens in this scene.

But thanks for the comment, as it led me to consider making a little change to the opening event that should make it a bit more interesting.
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.