Passion or friendship?

If he's too much a buddy, he's kind of too cuddly.

Not necessarily. Read Loretta Chase - I think her great talent is writing unmistakeably alpha heroes and yet showing just how much her heroes and heroines like each other. They always have well-rounded relationships built on much more than just lust and passion.

I think I might error on side of friendship. It's tough cause you want passion too. I tend to like more beta type heroes though. I think too much passion would turn me off as too unrealistic. Ala Romeo flowery speech outside balcony and comparing me to the sun or moon or whichever it was lol.

I like the antagonistic relationships too, the witty repartee, that can keep you from going overboard on the passion/because passion is there it's just found an outlet in arguing and definitely won't settle into just a friend zone.

I don't read a lot of romance. My main romance reads have been Georgette Heyer. I like the fact that all her characters seem well-rounded and realistic in their own ways--even when larger than life. That's not to answer your question, just a rabbit trail.

As a picky, mostly non-romance reader, I don't suppose I have a right to answer this. But here goes anyway.

Friendship is always interesting and likeable, even when that friendship is of a combatative nature. (Like Tony and Ziva on NCIS. Will they ever fall in love? I don't know that it matters. They're so fun to watch together, whether they're arguing or unexpectedly sticking up for each other!)

I always find myself a little bit turned off by the whole falling in love with the jerk storyline. I know it happens. I know hormones can make a jerk seem attractive. But overall I think that kind of story is just about physical relationships, and making the main characters suffer.

I don't like that. I'd prefer some warmth, maybe some arguing, and definitely some happy stuff, not just angst or sex in romance relationships.

Well, it doesn't have to be one or the other, right? Having both is ideal, obviously. But if I had to choose I guess I'd say friendship, because it lasts longer. Passion tends to dry up after awhile, or to wax and wane.

Antagonistic romances kind of irritate me. I mean, yeah, conflict can spice up a storyline, but all too often you just see the hero and heroine bickering like children and having petty battles for dominance. I'd much rather see two characters in a romance work together to overcome obstacles rather than fighting against each other.

The Otter said:

Well, it doesn't have to be one or the other, right? Having both is ideal, obviously. But if I had to choose I guess I'd say friendship, because it lasts longer. Passion tends to dry up after awhile, or to wax and wane.

Antagonistic romances kind of irritate me. I mean, yeah, conflict can spice up a storyline, but all too often you just see the hero and heroine bickering like children and having petty battles for dominance. I'd much rather see two characters in a romance work together to overcome obstacles rather than fighting against each other.

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Exactly! Quoted for truth.