How do you refer to characters who change their names a hundred pages into the book?

KCathy · Jul 5, 2009

This is driving me and my poor beta readers batty. My foster father and kidnapped (for her safety from birth mom) foster daughter use fake names when they move to a new town.

At first I just changed their names (with a little double use like Megan/Maggie and Ben/Brian) during their introduction to new characters, including his love-interest-to-be. From then on, I went with the new names for everything, hoping it would be less confusing that way.

Then Miss Love Interest finds out about the kidnapping and SHE calls them both by their old names when confronting Mr. Protagonist and getting at the truth by talking to Miss Foster Daughter.

I'm worried that this will drive readers crazy (and so are my betas), but am unsure how else to handle it. Any suggestions? Have any of you resolved similar problems in your own work?

The Lonely One · Jul 5, 2009

I would refer to the characters in dialog as the fake names (as it applies) and in narration as their real names, consistently. Or, the first few times, make light of it by using the fake names in parenthesis. Like,

Billy (Johnny) told Suzie (Greta) to put on her blond wig.

Just a thought.

Cassiopeia · Jul 5, 2009

I would find it distracting to read either way you've both listed. I say, make a reference to the change and leave it at that.

The Lonely One · Jul 5, 2009

I also think it depends on if the fake names are permanent changes. If it's something they do in the presence of strangers, temporarily, why the heck would the narrator refer to them by fake names to me, the reader? I would find THAT confusing.

To clarify; if the reader has been introduced to characters by certain names, we know them as THOSE names. If we're privy to the fact that the new names are fakes, we also know who the characters really are. So, to me, no reason to change them in narration. Just in conversation. If we know the characters are talking to outsiders who might endanger the situation, we understand why they're using fake names. This all comes down to your ability to explain clearly with your writing.

If it's a permanent change, as in, for the remainder of the book or whatever, something they refer to each other as, then you have to choose what call to make. It might be better to just change all around as Cassiopeia suggests.

dnic · Jul 5, 2009

I'm trying to remember examples where this happened and am drawing a blank. But I agree with The Lonely One. If it's permanent (as in both father and daughter acknowledge it), just use the new names. But if they're just aliases, have them introduce themselves by the new names to the people that they're meeting post-move, but speak to each other privately in their old. When referring to them out of dialogue, I think you can use their old names.

Cyia · Jul 5, 2009

I'm trying to remember if it's in the book Firestarter or just the movie, but I know that there was a situation there where the father and daughter used an alias with the elderly couple who took them in. (Charlie became Roberta, IIRC) Maybe you could check that one out and see how King handled it because the aliases were definitely just that. They never switched fully into a new identity.

mlazzer · Jul 6, 2009

I can point you to Terry Pratchett's novel Monstrous Regiment, pretty much all the characters change their name half-way into the novel...

Shweta · Jul 6, 2009

In Sharon Lee and Steve Miller's Agent of Change series, the characters end up in hiding and (not entirely for that reason, but hey) using other names. They're called the other names in dialogue, but the narrative refers to them by their own names the whole way through. It works perfectly well there...

Gary Clarke · Jul 6, 2009

In the second book of The Moorehawke Trilogy, Christopher, Wynter and Razi change thier names halfway through. The text still refers to them as Christopher, Wynter and Razi, but in dialogue the characters refer to them as Coinín, Iseult, and Tabiyb. It's simple and effective and the reader always knows where they stand.

Wark · Jul 6, 2009

All the characters in my book are assigned new names when they start working for the organization. Before, they are referred to their original name by the narration. I've even named one chapter Susan and it talks about Susan trying to survive in the woods until she is rescued. The rescuer/recruiter calls her Betty and she says her name isn't Betty. He lets her know it is now and the narration switches her to that name.

One character leaves for college with a nearly unpronounceable name and comes back as Jasper. The other character we go through this with goes by his old name in one chapter and otherwise is his new name.

I don't see any issues as it's pretty easy to follow. We know who is going to get recruited before it happens. It's the resistance they put up that charges the chapter. One recruitment is brutal, the recruitee beating the recruiter with a three foot copper rod.

DeadlyAccurate · Jul 6, 2009

Shweta said:
In Sharon Lee and Steve Miller's Agent of Change series, the characters end up in hiding and (not entirely for that reason, but hey) using other names. They're called the other names in dialogue, but the narrative refers to them by their own names the whole way through. It works perfectly well there...

That's how I did it in my book, though I should point out that the POV was 1st person.

MsGneiss · Jul 6, 2009

I would have the narrator call them by their ACTUAL names, and let the other characters in the book call them by the names that they know them by. Yes, it'll probably get confusing, but I think it's better than doing Bob (Bill), or alternately, Bob/Bill.

KCathy · Jul 6, 2009

To answer a question that seems to be coming up more than once here: the change is permanent, so they'll be using those names in public and private for the other two or three hundred pages of the book.

But

1. The main characters and love interest will account for most of the scenes involving their names.

2. Two minor characters, who spend the rest of the book hunting the main characters down, in part by interviewing people who knew the MC's, will continue referring to them by their original names.

I'm starting to think, based on some of your suggestions, that the combo of #1 and #2, despite the permanency of the change, would call for keeping the old names in play except during the rare introduction or two and their trip through Ecuadorian and possibly Peruvian customs (it's a long story).

Thanks for your help so far, but I'm loving the advice, so please keep it coming if you have other ideas!

Vomaxx · Jul 6, 2009

My main character, Andiriel, adopts the name Anashla to confuse assassins she thinks may be following her. For the rest of the book (and subsequent volumes) I always refer to her by her original name, Andiriel. People speaking to her call her Anashla, except those who knew her before she adopted her alias, who call her Andiriel. This can lead to sections like

"How are you today, Anashla?" Andiriel smiled before she replied...

I do not see this as a source of confusion, except perhaps to very dull people (who probably don't read books anyway).

Libbie · Jul 6, 2009

How does your main character think of herself? What name does she call herself, in her private thoughts? If her name at the beginning of the book was Annie, and she still thinks of herself as Annie even though now she has to use the name Mary, then still refer to her as Annie, but have other characters call her Mary.

For exmaple:

Annie walked into the general store to buy some toilet paper.

"Good morning, Mary," Mr. Thompson said from behind the counter.

"Good morning, Mr. Thompson," said Annie."

The red-haired girl tossed the ball. "Want to play?"

Annie caught it and tossed it back. "Sure."

"You're new in town, aren't you? What's your name?"

"Mary," Annie said.

Obviously this is not stellar scene-work above, but I'm just trying to illustrate my suggestion.

This is just my opinion, but to do anything otherwise would be spoon-feeding your readers. Give your readers some credit. They know Annie is still Annie, even if she has to use a different name. They're not dumb.

I'm assuming that you'll be telling your story from one character's or another's point of view, whether it's in first or limited third perspective. Most modern books are written that way. If you're in a character's head, experiencing what she experiences, then you should be truly in her head even down to how she's identified in the narrative. This approach works with either POV.

Libbie · Jul 6, 2009

Also, can you start the book AFTER the names have changed? That way, the reader knows these characters by their new names from the beginning, and that could make Love Interest's big reveal that much more powerful and shocking to the reader.

KCathy · Jul 6, 2009

Wow, ditching three months of work and 80 pages or so would be a pretty big darling to kill, but I'll think about it. I already threw out an entire first draft because I decided to change my MC's gender from female to male, so I'm willing to slay entire families, but I might need a stronger reason for similar slaughter than to avoid confusion.

I had been thinking, however, about how much stronger my beta readers' work has been in the last 50 pages or so (we trade 10 a week) and how that knowledge might be used to strengthen my own project. So I might already have that stronger reason. I'll have to think about it and be sure that's good enough before I break out the chainsaw.

Libbie · Jul 6, 2009

Well, IMO there's no better reason to cut text than to avoid reader confusion.

Also, you don't have to toss out all the work you did if you do decide to change where the novel begins. You can always use entire blocks of what you wrote "before" in dialogue or similar exposition after the true identities are found out. Depending on how your novel is arranged, you could basically just move what you currently have as the beginning of the book to the end!

DMarie84 · Jul 6, 2009

The Lonely One said:
I would refer to the characters in dialog as the fake names (as it applies) and in narration as their real names, consistently.
Just a thought.

That's what I do in my book. My MC has to go into hiding and take a new name. Her guardian/host family refers to her by her new name but throughout the narration I use her real name. No one in my critique group seems to be bothered by it; in fact they are often the ones to catch me if I slip up and have one of the characters refer to her by her 'real' name.

OpheliaRevived · Jul 6, 2009

I like the lonely one's idea. In my WIP, there are references to people before coming into an inherited title and then someone get's married and is then referred to by a married name. If it's natural for your story, the reader will get it.

Ken Schneider · Jul 6, 2009

Mr. and Mrs. if there's a sex change scene.

I know you'll find the solution on your own.

To me, The new love interest finding out the former names and situation in whatever manner she does, opens the door to use the old names in a confrontation with the man and girl. If the reader knows that the new love interest is going to confront the pair, I don't see where the confusion would arise.

My god. Brian is really Ben Blah. The man who kidnapped Maggie.

"Brian, why did you change your name? And why did you kidnap Maggie?"

Cathy, you can do this way better than I. If the reader knows the love interset is going to confront them, you're okay IMO.

Sage · Jul 6, 2009

I would go with whatever name the POV character thinks of the character being mentioned.

eyeblink · Jul 6, 2009

Sage said:
I would go with whatever name the POV character thinks of the character being mentioned.

I would too. The Storyteller's Tale is third person limited, so characters are referred to by the name the POV character knows them by, even when they are going under false names and identities.

DeleyanLee · Jul 6, 2009

Not that the book got published (probably 'cause I didn't submit it), but my hero had to do the same thing (it was a historical)--he left the place he'd been held and went back to his people as soon as he could escape. I handled it by giving him names that started with the same letter and no one else in the book got a name starting with it. In this case, the letter was F (Fredrick and Feagh were his names). Even when he was being called Fredrick, he thought of himself as Feagh. How he was referred to in narrative depended on what the POV character thought of him as.

About 9 people beta'd the book for me, not one of them reported a problem with name confusion. (The most I got was someone hating the name "Feagh" and pushing me to change it to "Kevin". LOL! Didn't happen.)

Usually the simplest answers are the most elegant, in my experience.

RJK · Jul 6, 2009

When the witness protection folks change people's identities, the often let the people keep their first names. It keeps the mistakes down to a minimum. You could do the same thing here, keeping the first names, and cut the number of times you refer to the new last name.

How do you refer to characters who change their names a hundred pages into the book?

Writer when I grow up

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Otherwise Occupied

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Resident Lurker

Rewriting My Destiny

New kid, be gentle

gone

Knackered

Mark Brockman

Absolutely Fazed

Writer when I grow up

Worst song played on ugliest guitar

Worst song played on ugliest guitar

Writer when I grow up

Worst song played on ugliest guitar

I wish I had a time machine

Real Men Have Gills

Absolute sagebrush

Our Lady of Parentheticals

Barbara says hi

Writing Anarchist

Sheriff Bullwinkle the Poet says: