another help with this sentence please

bkwriter · Jun 10, 2009

ok, I have the angles flying threw the air very fast chasing after another angel. If you could help that would be great.

The ground below looked like a streak of ?.

brown river
streaks of mud
streaks of green and brown

What do you think?

Ludka · Jun 11, 2009

I like the image of the ground looking like a brown river, but that gives me the picture of a mudslide. I don't know if that's what you're going for.

alleycat · Jun 11, 2009

Well, unless these angels are flying faster than the speed of sound, or flying very low, it's not going to look like a streak at all.

It could . . . look like a patchwork quilt.

Or, if you still want to keep the steak analogy:

The ground below was a rushing blur of greens and browns and sparkling blues.

bkwriter · Jun 12, 2009

Thanks allycat

bkwriter · Jun 12, 2009

oh yes, were can I find how to write synopis and qurry letter?

Ludka · Jun 13, 2009

There are tons of websites that offer good starting points. My suggestion would be to google "how to write a synopsis" and "how to write a query," write them based on those, and then toss them into SYW and have the squirrels tear them apart. You'd be amazed at how much to learn when you have your work critiqued there.

bkwriter · Jun 13, 2009

Thanks Ludka

Ludka · Jun 14, 2009

Anytime.

Greenwolf103 · Jun 21, 2009

I like alleycat's suggestion. It's more visual, if not accurate. (Don't forget the color black!)

Arkie · Jun 21, 2009

The few times I have flown with angels, the ground seemed a colorful patchwork of fields, wood lots, towns, lakes and rivers. I don't remember anything brown.

another help with this sentence please

bkwriter

Ludka

Hath more hair than wit

alleycat

Still around

bkwriter

bkwriter

Ludka

Hath more hair than wit

bkwriter

Ludka

Hath more hair than wit

Greenwolf103

I'm a grrrl dog, yo

Arkie

a reader's ear and a writer's heart