The Book You Would Want Written For You

That's really interesting. I already absolutely love reading so I'm not looking for a perfect book, but I am writing my own daughter a middle grade reader series. She already loves reading but I wanted to write something special and I love seeing her eyes light up as I read the story and hear her beg for another chapter. I hope it gets published and other little girls find it "perfect" for them, but I am writing it for her.

Sara

OK, I know. I would like for Neil Gaiman and the ghost of Mervyn Peake to cowrite an epic nautical fantasy trilogy about a female tall ship captain and her quest to rid the seas of evil monsters/pirates and find true love. And there would have to be sea shanties in it. And you can quote me on that!

It's got to have 'tragic, impossible love', or seem to have it. Think 'Ghost and Mrs. Muir' with Tierney. 'Somewhere in Time'. 'Anne of the Thousand Days'. 'Braveheart'. 'Brigadoon' - although it does have a happy ending. 'Camelot'. 'Casablanca'. 'Cyrano de Bergerac'. 'Outlander'.

Me, myself and I--I miss the over-the-top naughtiness and rampant fun of the old 1980's "bodice rippers". The super-uber-alpha heroes. Heroines who were innocent in some ways and wise in others and didn't have everyone "adore" them because they had laser-sharpened tongues. The villains who could get eaten by alligators at the end. I sorely miss the fun of those stories. So much of fiction takes itself so blasted seriously lately. I really miss the "slocky B" books that were consistent within themselves and managed to be very tongue-in-cheek at the same time.

Yeah, I really miss mind-candy and it's getting hard to buy replacement copies.

Something that would have me ROTFL. Like the Stephanie Plum series by Janet Evanovich

I'd love another Catch-22. That kind of satire seems missing from the shelves, as far as I can tell.

You can quote me, but I realize that this might not be a mainstream view or anything

Tanya Egan Gibson said:

I'm also considering writing a piece about why non-readers (like my protagonist) dislike reading. If you know anyone (particularly teenagers) who doesn't like reading who would like to weigh in on the issue, I'd love his/her input!
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Okay, I'm a teenager, and one who loves reading. I've always loved reading, ever since I was a kid. But I am surrounded by hundreds of teens at school who don't read much. I don't think "dislike" is the word to use here, because it's not that they don't like reading, they would just rather be doing something else.

For most teens, playing computer games, out at parties, watching movies, texting etc. are far more appealing than sitting in with a book. I think this problem has came with new technologies and gadgets. I also think that the stereotype of being a "geek" applies, when someone talks about reading as a hobby. Reading is not considered "cool", and being teenagers, we must do all we can to make sure we're as close to "cool" as possible.

Another problem may lie within English classes and exams at school. To get good grades in English, we don't read books in genres that interest us individually, or write stories of our choice. We write critical evaluations on the classics such as "Lord of the Flies", "Romeo and Juliet", "Hamlet" etc.
Even as an avid reader, I sit bored when reading texts such as these, so I can't imagine what torture it must be like for those non-readers. Maybe if schools encouraged teens to pick books of their choice to study and read then we might be able to produce a little more interest in reading, and maybe even writing too.

If the MC was a woman I'd like to read a well written female seriel killer story. I don't mean one of those stories where the woman is beating up guys with karate and all that--it's unbelievable. One where she understands her physical abilities aren't enough, so she makes up in cunning what she lacks in physical prowess.

It would be nice if she wasn't a victim of some horrific crime too--she's just born bad.

I want something whimsical, but aimed at adults. Like a world inhabited by mushroom men and sentient clouds. Everything would be brightly coloured and sparklie (including the book cover).

No humans would be allowed in my story, because they're so clichéd. Too many books are about them.

(You can quote me if you'd like).

Tanya Egan Gibson said:

OFG, I'm a big fan of "tragic, impossible love" myself! Is it okay if I end up quoting you?

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Absolutely. I love being quoted. And I can make a longer list if you need it. I just stopped with the 'Cs' in my movie collection list.

I would like Jean Auel's Earth's Children[sup]TM[/sup] series re-written as I would have written it -- cut the verbose bloatitude, cut the slobbery multipage sex, cool it with the #$%^&* head-hopping, tighten up the fact(oid)s, make the characters a little less larger than life, make the dialog more lifelike (and no AYKB!), cut 80% of the inventions....

Kind of like what I'm doing now, only my stuff is unabashed fantasy

The Wasteland and Other Peoms

It seems like it was written for me.

Tanya Egan Gibson said:

As a former H.S. English teacher, I suspected this. (My protagonist says her teachers make her and her classmates dissect books like fetal pigs.) Are you okay with my quoting part of what you've written above?

Thanks so much, Anonymous Writer!

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I'm sure many in my class feel the same way as your protagonist. I don't detest as much, but I'm getting pretty close.

And sure, quote anything you want from my post.