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View Full Version : Things you REALLY would like to add... but you can't


Kaiser-Kun
02-17-2009, 06:22 AM
Almost at the end of my story, the characters realize their death is inevitable. And after watching the Simpsons, I couldn't stop myself from writing:

and then Nelson Muntz passed by in bicycle. "Ha-ha!", he said.I stared into the scene, then deleted the Nelson bit.

Have you ever played like that with your writing?

Namatu
02-17-2009, 07:10 PM
Yes, and I leave it in until edits because it entertains me. :D

RedScylla
02-17-2009, 07:39 PM
I'm more likely to include things that DO happen in the story, but that are completely interstitial. Like the awkward two-minute conversations that happen after something important. I put them in, because I enjoy that stuff, but then in edits I have to take them out to make the pacing work properly.

Ha-ha!

Wayne K
02-17-2009, 08:37 PM
When I wrote my first memoir I added all kinds of interesting and perceptive things. When I edited, I sat there deleting paragraph after paragraph screaming "Shut up Wayne!"

josephwise
02-17-2009, 08:41 PM
A metalic claw reached out as the handcar passed a darkened corridor. Fuller yelped as he was dragged to the ground, and then out of sight. He was gone. Benson let the shock of it subside. "Good thing we had a disposable character on board," he thought.

tehuti88
02-17-2009, 08:58 PM
Sometimes I wish something had gone differently (for example, one character whose death prompted a significant change in another character, I wish he could still be alive to meet that character he changed), and have to tell myself that NO NO NO!!--I can't do that because it would ruin the entire thing! But an example like what the OP suggests, I can't say I've ever done that. Funny, though. :D

Mr Flibble
02-17-2009, 09:03 PM
My reference to the Dudley Boyz is still in there.

williemeikle
02-17-2009, 09:05 PM
I was writing a book about a vampire Messiah, but eventually gave it up because one character wouldn't stop saying

He's not the Messiah, he's a very naughty boy.

Bookdragonette
02-17-2009, 09:50 PM
I have a tendency to put in quotes from and allusions to tv-shows and things like that. They rarely survive.

Cranky
02-17-2009, 10:09 PM
I did something like this (sort of) when I was sketching out a plot arc last night. Like so:

Obstacles : her father
her dead mother (literally?)

So, what does she do about it?

First, she starts looking for X, because he's showing up everywhere she goes, but no one else can see him.

So she goes to see Character Y, and then THIS IS THE PART WHERE I GET INCREDIBLY EFFIN' BORED AND KILL EVERYONE! HA-HA, THE END!

Yeah, I'm not really diggin' my story at the moment. :D

underthecity
02-17-2009, 11:45 PM
My novel isn't steampunk in the very least, but lately I've been reading about steampunk on the web and had an idea today.

In my story, the MC builds a machine to catch ghosts. The end product is about the size of two refrigerators, has all kinds of pipes and gauges and wires sticking out of it. There is a scene where he reveals the machine to some people. One of them comments: "it looks like something out of Frankenstein."

I thought about changing her line to "It looks steampunk!"

But the Frankenstein bit just works better.

SmallThing
02-18-2009, 12:12 AM
All the time. I recently rewrote a major action scene in a bookstore. It was full of fluff, from the interrupted booksigning to the sheepish guy reading in the back corner. It survived one whole afternoon, provided me with some much needed entertainment, then went under the knife and returned to its previous svelte form.

Nivarion
02-18-2009, 08:12 PM
though this is going to be changed, every one of my characters have the last words of "OH SH-"

Tasmin21
02-18-2009, 09:48 PM
There was one point, in the middle of a first draft, where my MC threw up his hands, yelled "Bugger it all, I quit!" and walked out of the story.

I got him back though, after some very tight negotiations.

oswann
02-19-2009, 08:47 PM
Then they did it.

Sam Stephens
02-20-2009, 03:20 AM
There was one point, in the middle of a first draft, where my MC threw up his hands, yelled "Bugger it all, I quit!" and walked out of the story.

I got him back though, after some very tight negotiations.

If he walks out again, you could always hire a MC straight out of Uni for half the salary.

It would also keep the rest of your characters in check, make sure they realise they're replaceable. That'll crush any fantasies of grandeur they may be cradling.

cheers
Sam

Kaiser-Kun
02-20-2009, 03:39 AM
If he walks out again, you could always hire a MC straight out of Uni for half the salary.

It would also keep the rest of your characters in check, make sure they realise they're replaceable. That'll crush any fantasies of grandeur they may be cradling.

And then Nelson Muntz passed by in bicycle.

http://op-for.com/simpsons_nelson_haha2.jpg

scarletpeaches
02-20-2009, 03:43 AM
My WIP is full of in-jokes, most of which only thethinker42 and I would get. I'm hoping to slip quit a few past any editing process.

thethinker42
02-20-2009, 04:40 AM
My WIP is full of in-jokes, most of which only thethinker42 and I would get. I'm hoping to slip quit a few past any editing process.

Ditto. Some of my CHARACTERS are inside jokes, even. None of my betas have caught any of them, because they're pretty well hidden, but it gives me a snicker now and then. :D

ETA: I wanted a friend to read one of my partial drafts a few years ago, but she insisted she wouldn't read it until it was done. I sent it to her. She read and read, then screamed with rage when she turned to the last page and it said, in MID-scene: "And they all died. The End."

LOL She never forgave me for that...:D