Is it okay use telling if it's a memory?

I have the same problem, or at least I will have the same problem when I get further along into my WIP.

My feeling is that it's okay to 'tell' a memory, as long as you're not like:

My dog Scout was very loyal. Scout died young.

But are more like:

In his short life, Scout managed to do what a hundred hours of marriage counseling could not do for my husband: he taught me the importance of loyalty.

Relate it to your the present story, and make it a hybrid of showing and telling. You could even use dialogue, like, "You remember when...?" but I suppose that wouldn't work if this abuse is the secret of your MC.

I don't think it's telling in the strictest sense. It's a commonly used method of relaying information to the reader quickly. I've seen it used in many novels, and I've used it as well.

You're fine.

Telling is not evil. It's okay to tell. But beyond that, there's nothing wrong with your example. It's a simple way to inform the reader quickly, and showing three beatings to get the point across would be excessive.

Dana-Lynn said:

I am writing my second novel in first person present tense. My main character has a lot of memories of things that've happened in her past. And these memories are what shapes what's happening in her present, so it's important information.

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You're talking about flashbacks. Write them just the same way you write the here-and-now. They should be just as engaging to your reader as the present day stuff (if not more, because you're putting your story on hold while you go back into the past).

Just be sure that you really need to use them. Often you don't need to go back and replay how someone or something shaped the way they did, you just need to show how they are. Or a small clue will do the job and the reader will make connections.

Cheers,
Rob

Personally, I felt your example is well written and if you are telling some one something, then that is the way to do it.Howevere,the problem with inserting memories is that they tend to bring the story to a stop, too many can make the pace slow,and confusing to read .Flashbacks, can be very effective and is good for increasing suspense.But unless your story is a suspense , they are best avoided or at lest kept to a minimum.

Dana-Lynn said:

Isn't there a difference between a "flashback" and a "memory", though?

I don't think memories are handled in quite the same way as flashbacks, and they don't command the same level of detail that a flashback scene requires.

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You're right, they're not the same.

I wouldn't consider this a flashback--it's just a memory. Telling a memory is generally fine, since a memory is essentially a summary of a flashback.

A flashback would require showing. It lets the reader re-live the memory just like the character remembers it.

But sometimes, a story doesn't call for a full-blown flashback. If it's not necessary to know to details, if it would interrupt the pace of the story to go back and "show" it, or if it would become too repetitive for the author to "show" every memory in flashback form. Filling a story with memories and "telling" is a bad idea and boring, of course, but using them to bridge from one scene to another is fine. "Telling" is usually okay in transitions, as long as we get back to being "shown" the important scene next.

For example, in your case, I would assume you've shown the abuse at some point in the story? Maybe a few scenes ago, we experience a scene where dad came home drunk and beat him similarly, then showing us this memory as a flashback isn't really necessarily unless it differs greatly from previous experiences. Unless this particular incident of abuse was different somehow (other than the results--mom finding out--that is), it probably isn't necessary to show us again.

The one thing that I would wonder about is "I can’t even remember what he got so mad at me about, but he snapped so suddenly, I didn’t see it coming." I would wonder if why he got so mad and snapped so suddenly is important to the story or not. (Also, as a side note, if the dad came home that drunk, and your MC is used to this, I wouldn't find it very believable that she "didn't see it coming," unless there was some time period of "getting better" before this that I'm not seeing from this quote.) Other than that, your example seems fine to me.

I honestly get a little tired of this phobia of telling. Sure you should try to show as much as possible, but if there are sections that need telling, then tell for god's sakes. Just remember to keep it interesting and well written. In the instance the OP was referring to and in the example given, I saw nothing to complain about.

Your example is short, a little over 100 words, and gets the information across efficiently in a fairly interesting way without bogging the story down.

A long flashback showing the past events would stop the current story. Which might be appropriate, especially if the character in the present time is having psychological flashbacks to the past event or if it's important for readers to be familiar with details about the past events that will become significant in the future. But it's not necessary if the main point is just to give the reader information about the past that the character already knows well.

A long passage summarizing past events without involving the reader in how they unfolded at the time would be the worst of both worlds.

This is okay, but I don't get much of the character's voice in it, which is important for first-person. I don't write YA or middle grade stuff and I imagine it might be tough to get the voice of a thirteen or fourteen year-old. On the other hand, Mr. Twain did all right with Huck Finn.

I think the paragraph you shared is fine. It's short, and gives us enough information without bogging things down. My only concern is that you mentioned your character has a lot of memories like this inserted throughout the nine chapters you have so far. You'd just want to make sure that all of the information in the memories is essential to the story, otherwise it might start to slow things down a bit.

I think of telling more like
HE WAS ANGRY

and showing:
He clenched his fists into tight balls and took three strides forward...

What you are describing is narrative which is perfectly fine- in fact too much immediate scene/dialogue is wearying to a reader. There are lots of time narrative is good - especially in first person.
I used first person in LOTTERY and there were many times I used narrative to segue into scenes both in the past and present-

Whether it's memory, a flashback, or an earlier scene, show vs. tell works the same way. The question you ask is whether there's a need to go into details, or if summarization would work fine for pace and information only.

"Tell" is not evil. It's a good tool. The trick is to know when to tell and when to show. Now, that's the art of writing.