Yikes! Do I have the strength for this story idea?

Woven · Dec 18, 2008

We just lost a student at our school from a disease he's been suffering with from birth. The loss got my imagination running away from me this morning and I started picturing what I would do if I found out my own son had only one month to live. I had to stop my brain from going down that road, so I turned it into a story line with fictional characters and allowed my imagination to go wild.

By the time I had finished mapping the story out in my head while in the shower, I was actually crying, and I don't cry...ever. I just finished writing the idea up so I won't lose it and had tears in my eyes just from that.

I don't know if I have the strength to pursue this story line! Has anyone ever had a similar experience?

Claudia Gray · Dec 18, 2008

It isn't a matter of whether or not you have the strength to pursue the storyline -- it's whether or not you have the strength to pursue it yet. You might need to give it a few weeks or months to give you a time to heal from the real loss.

Philky · Dec 18, 2008

I agree with Claudia. This sounds like a great premise for a story. However, put some distance between this real event and your writing. I think you'll find it shapes up to be an even better story once you do that.

The Lonely One · Dec 18, 2008

I'm actually going to be a descending voice here. I think being wrapped up in a story emotionally is the best time to write it. Write through the tears; it's safe, unless you have a heart condition that prevents you from being too stressed out. (But if you do, I'd suggest something other than writing.)

Some of my favorite work has been written through tears. It's as if the emotion you're feeling gets locked into your story.

I actually think you're more likely to make your story MELOdramatic if you write it without FEELING dramatic. If you're outside the moment, and writing analytically, you're going to analyze the emotion and attempt to replicate it (this has never worked right, in my experience).

Just one guy's opinion, but I think what you feel when you write your story is a crucial ingredient of the process.

Woven · Dec 18, 2008

I don't know. Everyone has their own life story to write, I suppose. I've tried writing mine before. I've fictionalized it, added different characters, changed it, but it's still ultimately about me. I've never been able to do it.

The conception of this one comes 1) from a little boy we just lost and 2) from imagining my own child (8 years old) with only one month to live. I don't know if I can write through that. It has too much of me in it.

Also, it's not a story I would pick up. It's one of those stories I would always mean to read someday, but would never actually get around to because I'm never quite in the mood for it. If I ever read a story like that or watch a movie like that it's because I stumbled upon it without knowing what it was first. I'm a very upbeat person and I don't show or share emotion well.

This is a tough one for me.

The Lonely One · Dec 18, 2008

Woven,

I also apologize if I offended. T'was not my intention; I can see why writing this would be difficult. Even if you don't use it for a novel, free writing your feelings about this tragedy can be an aid in the healing process. But ultimately, you must do what you feel is right for you.

My condolences.

Woven · Dec 18, 2008

The Lonely One said:
Woven,

I also apologize if I offended. T'was not my intention; I can see why writing this would be difficult. Even if you don't use it for a novel, free writing your feelings about this tragedy can be an aid in the healing process. But ultimately, you must do what you feel is right for you.

My condolences.

Oh, not at all!! Please, I'm difficult to offend.

I like what you have said, very much! You are absolutely right. Now might be the best time to write it.

Thank you for the condolences but this is more about...gosh, I really don't know what it's about. I'm just talking through it, I guess.

Jerry B. Flory · Dec 18, 2008

Your asking the wrong question.
Does your strength and emotional fortitude equal That of the young man who battled his disease?
Do you have what it takes to honor him and will waiting until you can deal with it lessen it in any way?
Answer these questions by making your best attempt to write now. Pour those ripe and painful emotions out then distance yourself from them and read it later. Write it again and do a contrast and comparison between the two.
I think then, you'll find you might have regretted waiting.

willietheshakes · Dec 18, 2008

Well...

I wrote Before I Wake in a fever of terror. I was turning thirty (which, then, seemed a hellish milestone), and my wife had just announced that she was pregnant. And I spiralled. I'm a worst-case scenario, glass-mostly-empty kind of guy, and the only way I had to deal with my fear was to write down where those fears took me. Hence, losing a child in an accident. But not losing the child. Losing a marriage...

Sure, the book took a few turns along the way (!), but, really, it's my fear, right there on the page. And it wasn't a matter of being strong enough to write it -- it was a matter of it taking more strength not to write it.

Nateskate · Dec 18, 2008

Tragedy is so difficult. It takes time to sort things. But I do believe that good often arise out of hardships and sorrows.

AllieB · Dec 18, 2008

I heard best-selling author Eloisa James speak at a recent conference about a novel she wrote where a character loses a child at birth - and she wrote it during her own difficult pregnancy, where that fear was very real for her. She said it was incredibly hard to do, but turned out very real - and that several readers have since emailed to tell her how much they loved that scene, pain and all.

Fullback · Dec 18, 2008

Some of us have buried a child. No offense, but why do you think you can move me with your imagination of what you think it might be like?

Woven · Dec 18, 2008

Fullback said:
Some of us have buried a child. No offense, but why do you think you can move me with your imagination of what you think it might be like?

I never said I could move others. I said I had moved myself.

Big difference.

RunawayScribe · Dec 18, 2008

I agree with Lonely One about the emotional writing. Some of what I consider my strongest pieces were written during very difficult times.
I'm so sorry about your loss, Woven.

superman skivvies · Dec 19, 2008

If you are a good writer, and I'm sure you are, you have the ability to transport your emotions to paper, and from paper to the hearts of readers. I would start your story now, if you are up to the challenge, while you still feel very strongly about the plot. If you try and find out this is too soon, then put it off. No big deal. I think you will find that writing about it actually helps, though. It always makes me feel better to put it down on paper when I have something I want to say.

Yikes! Do I have the strength for this story idea?

Woven

Claudia Gray

Philky

Redneck Jedi

The Lonely One

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Woven

The Lonely One

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Woven

Jerry B. Flory

under the Milky Way

willietheshakes

Gentleman. Scholar. Bastard.

Nateskate

AllieB

Fullback

Woven

RunawayScribe

It is what it is.

superman skivvies

Wannabe Writer