- Joined
- Nov 5, 2008
- Messages
- 4,001
- Reaction score
- 477
- Location
- Pacific Northwest, Washington
- Website
- merrihiatt.com
Lords of the Prance
- Thread starter James D. Macdonald
- Start date
- Joined
- Apr 10, 2005
- Messages
- 725
- Reaction score
- 100
- Joined
- Feb 11, 2005
- Messages
- 25,582
- Reaction score
- 3,785
- Location
- New Hampshire
- Website
- madhousemanor.wordpress.com
There is Nothing Like a Frame
(From South Patrick Street)
Chorus of Darfs and Zobmies:
We got edits line-by-line,
We got covers made for free,
We’re available in bookstores
Right from sea to shining sea,
We got letters to our loved ones
That are sent out in our names!
What ain't we got?
No checks in frames!
We got contracts we can sign,
All our books come with discounts,
We get handling and shipping
In some very odd amounts,
We got message boards in private,
We can go inside and read!
What don't we got?
We’re all agreed!
We have nothin' to hang on the wall of our studies
What we need is something to show to all our buddies...
There is nothin' like a frame
Nothin' in the world,
There is nothin' you can name
Like a check stuck inside a frame!
We feel joyous, we feel glad,
As we trek from store to store,
We feel ev'ry kind of feelin',
But the one we're lookin' for,
We feel happy as a kitty
Who just got his tummy rubbed!
What don't we feel?
We don't feel pubbed!
Lots of things can make you feel like a published author, but brother,
There is one particular thing that is nothin' whatsoever
In any way, shape or form like any other.
There is nothin' like a frame,
Nothin' in the world,
There is nothin' you can name
Like a check that's inside a frame!
Nothin' else is quite the same,
Nothin' in the world
As the local-celeb fame
Of a check that’s inside a frame!
There is absolutely nothin' like a fame of a frame.
So suppose that PA check
Is for zero in amount,
And you know that you sold something,
‘Cause you kept a careful count,
It's a waste of time to worry
Over things that you have not,
Be thankful for the things you’ve got!
There is nothin' you can name
That is anythin' like a frame!
There are no books like a frame,
And nothin' looks like a frame.
There is no pride like a frame,
And nothin' s eyed like a frame,
Nothin' hangs like a frame,
Or sturm und drangs like a frame.
There ain't a thing in the PAMB
That's better than sending in your fee
For a genuine eight-by-ten wood and plexiglass frame!
(From South Patrick Street)
Chorus of Darfs and Zobmies:
We got edits line-by-line,
We got covers made for free,
We’re available in bookstores
Right from sea to shining sea,
We got letters to our loved ones
That are sent out in our names!
What ain't we got?
No checks in frames!
We got contracts we can sign,
All our books come with discounts,
We get handling and shipping
In some very odd amounts,
We got message boards in private,
We can go inside and read!
What don't we got?
We’re all agreed!
We have nothin' to hang on the wall of our studies
What we need is something to show to all our buddies...
There is nothin' like a frame
Nothin' in the world,
There is nothin' you can name
Like a check stuck inside a frame!
We feel joyous, we feel glad,
As we trek from store to store,
We feel ev'ry kind of feelin',
But the one we're lookin' for,
We feel happy as a kitty
Who just got his tummy rubbed!
What don't we feel?
We don't feel pubbed!
Lots of things can make you feel like a published author, but brother,
There is one particular thing that is nothin' whatsoever
In any way, shape or form like any other.
There is nothin' like a frame,
Nothin' in the world,
There is nothin' you can name
Like a check that's inside a frame!
Nothin' else is quite the same,
Nothin' in the world
As the local-celeb fame
Of a check that’s inside a frame!
There is absolutely nothin' like a fame of a frame.
So suppose that PA check
Is for zero in amount,
And you know that you sold something,
‘Cause you kept a careful count,
It's a waste of time to worry
Over things that you have not,
Be thankful for the things you’ve got!
There is nothin' you can name
That is anythin' like a frame!
There are no books like a frame,
And nothin' looks like a frame.
There is no pride like a frame,
And nothin' s eyed like a frame,
Nothin' hangs like a frame,
Or sturm und drangs like a frame.
There ain't a thing in the PAMB
That's better than sending in your fee
For a genuine eight-by-ten wood and plexiglass frame!
Last edited:
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2005
- Messages
- 2,916
- Reaction score
- 403
On Reading _____’s Dedicated Thread
(Sir Elton John, “Your Song”)
It’s a little bit funny, just reading the posts;
There’re some that are modest; there’re some that are boasts;
Some don’t have great grammar, some commas are wrong—
But please be assured, his message is strong.
If he had an agent, but then again, no—
Or a publisher that paid an advance, don’t you know—
You say it’s not much, but it’s the best I can do.
My gift is advice, and here’s some for you:
You can tell everybody you wrote a great book,
But if it’s not in stores, buyers can’t take a look.
No distribution,
No distribution,
To get your book on store shelves,
Makes PA a bad place to tether yourself.
I read posts this morning, and bounced off the walls.
Well a few of the posters say he’s got brass b@lls.
But he don’t* want to know what he’s gotten into,
And so he hits out without thinking it through…
So excuse me for trying, but with this one, who knew?
He says that blue’s green, and he thinks that green’s blue.
Anyway, the thing is, he likes the crab trap just fine.
So watch out if you’re trying from trouble to climb.
And you can tell everybody you wrote a great book,
But if it’s not in stores, buyers can’t take a look.
No distribution,
No distribution,
To get your book on store shelves,
Makes PA a bad place to tether yourself.
*Yeah, yeah, I know it’s ungrammatical. I did it for the meter, okay? Sheesh.
(Sir Elton John, “Your Song”)
It’s a little bit funny, just reading the posts;
There’re some that are modest; there’re some that are boasts;
Some don’t have great grammar, some commas are wrong—
But please be assured, his message is strong.
If he had an agent, but then again, no—
Or a publisher that paid an advance, don’t you know—
You say it’s not much, but it’s the best I can do.
My gift is advice, and here’s some for you:
You can tell everybody you wrote a great book,
But if it’s not in stores, buyers can’t take a look.
No distribution,
No distribution,
To get your book on store shelves,
Makes PA a bad place to tether yourself.
I read posts this morning, and bounced off the walls.
Well a few of the posters say he’s got brass b@lls.
But he don’t* want to know what he’s gotten into,
And so he hits out without thinking it through…
So excuse me for trying, but with this one, who knew?
He says that blue’s green, and he thinks that green’s blue.
Anyway, the thing is, he likes the crab trap just fine.
So watch out if you’re trying from trouble to climb.
And you can tell everybody you wrote a great book,
But if it’s not in stores, buyers can’t take a look.
No distribution,
No distribution,
To get your book on store shelves,
Makes PA a bad place to tether yourself.
*Yeah, yeah, I know it’s ungrammatical. I did it for the meter, okay? Sheesh.