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Duck soup is not as good as turtle soup, and neither is as good as moose soup.

"You keep telling me I don't know nothing," he said, "and that's a lie, because I do know nothing."

Afternoon activities at Camp Tatawacky include swimming, hiking, ping-pong, tether ball, bread making, archery, badminton, frisbees, painting, sketching, taffy makinjg, basket weaving, map making, leather craft, bear hunting, tag, canyoning, balloon ball, fabric design, scavenger hunt, mushroom identification, insect collecting, juggling, rope climbing, hatchet throwing and rattlesnake handling.

"Specimen" was his pet name for his two-headed girlfriend.

Dolls of all kinds are available at Pamela's Porn Palace, and some of them are remarkably lifelike.

Lifelike is what your characters should be. How can we get you to put that doll in the closet and write?

"Write about what you know" is the timeworn advice doled out in writing classes, but what if everything you know is boring?

Industries are well on their way to shipping all their jobs overseas, so that Americans won't have to work anymore and can just sit back and eat, drink and be merry till the cows come home--if there are any cows left.

Currency can be anything, including beads, shells and elephant skins.

Mother-in-law Day is the new national holiday proclaimed by Congress, and people are getting ready to celebrate it with parades, picnics and concerts--though some cynics are predicting unexplained disappearances.

Shelter from a storm is poorly provided by the average umbrella.

Buttknot elephants are the worst kind because they carry their tusks on their posteriors.

Interiors Illustrated is a standard textbook in most medical schools.

Creativity is overrated, since it's a lot easier just to copy what somebody else has done.