I'm sorry to hear this. Something about your story struck me though-this person not only took their own life, but put others in danger in the act. From someone who everyone else said was a good guy-this has to be shocking. .
This too was what shocked me the most. Couldn't he have driven into a tree or off a bridge or something? Doing it this way really, really pisses me off and I can't feel sorry for him. ANy greatness he had was completely erased by that.
A friend of mine committed suicide a few months ago. She used to be my very closest friend when we were teenagers and young women. We went through thick and thin. We were in London together, wild and free for the first time in our lives, at the age of 17 and 18. Then she, I and her boyfriend went travelling for 18 months through SOuth America. It was fantastic. During that trip, much of what she was to become later in life formed itself.
She identified competyely with the INdios of SOuth America and was deeply concerned and angered by their plight and their exploitation. Later, she went back to Guyana with her guy and we all started a farm in the jungle, far away fromc civilisation. She wanted to live as close to nature as possible. SHe even delivered her second child in the jungle, with only her husband as midwife.
Later, the family went to live in AMerica. Her husband was one of the sweetest guys I ever knew, really softhearted and good-natured, while Margaret was more of a fighter. SHe always said what she thought out loud and didn't care if others were offended. She always defended the underdog, with everything she had.
We lost touch but then a few years ago began corresponding. ABout a year ago she wrote me to say she was leaving her husband and going ot live in Arizona. She sung the praises of Sedona, where she was going to live. She told me of all the work she was doing on behalf of Native Americans, how she supported them politcally,and also the Amerinidans back in Guyana. They all saw her as a fighter for their rights. She would write furious letters to the Preisdent of the country and try to get things done.
I remember she once wrote me a rather rude letter because I had declined to get involved witrh some project she was into, saying I had no time, She thouhgt we should ALWAYS have time to save the planet and so on. She accused me of selfishness. I ignored that letter and she later apologised.
I have mails from her dated just a few weeks before she committed the act. She had really bad words for her husband, said it was a nasty divorce, which I just cannot imagine from him, He is a guy who I have NEVER seen angry or or hurtful to another in even the slighest way. But she blamed him for everything. ALso, for the fact that their kids and grandchild stayed with him and did not come to Arizona with her.
Out of the blue, he wrote to say she had committed suicde. No-one had seen it coming. SHe kept up the act till the very end; however, she moved into a motel in New Jersey very near to where he and the family were living. They had not even known she was so near.
He said that hundreds of people from far and wide came to attend the funeral. She was well loved and admired.
I think her rage and the sense of frustration at not being able to change the world to a better place got the better of her. It is very sad, She was basically such a good person, and only wanted the best for the world. Her husband said she had fallen prey to a terrible mental disease. I have not been able to find out more.