Stupid Things Writers Say.

Status
Not open for further replies.

KTC

Stand in the Place Where You Live
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Mar 24, 2005
Messages
29,138
Reaction score
8,563
Location
Toronto
Website
ktcraig.com
Come on. It was inevitable.

What are some of the stupid things you have heard fellow writers say? Please...name no names if you are referring to writers at AW. Writers, at least in my opinion, talk themselves into ever widening and narrowing circles when it comes to rejection, acceptance, and every other writing related issue. I think creativity is linked closely to our ability to value ourselves. ie...our self esteem, etc.

What overly negative or overly positive stupid thing have you heard writers saying? What absolutely wrong or bad advice have you heard writers give?

Let's not make this a freeforall...I mean this thread with the best of intentions.
 

Tiger

AKA: "Gums of Steel"
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 18, 2005
Messages
1,879
Reaction score
487
Location
Honolulu
"Fear not! I'm a writer"
 

Bubastes

bananaed
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 7, 2006
Messages
7,394
Reaction score
2,250
Website
www.gracewen.com
"I have a book published by Publish America, so I have lots of writing advice to share with you wannabes."

As far as stupid stuff I've said myself? Boy, where do I start? I love the taste of shoe leather.
 
Last edited:

TrainofThought

A flowering bud of bitchiness
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 7, 2006
Messages
6,179
Reaction score
6,835
Location
Land of Bier
Website
www.authordenisebaer.com
:roll:

I need to put on my boxing gloves to answer this post. Instead, I will refrain from responding since I respect too many on this forum.

And yes, this is a stupid thing a writer says, they post without answering the thread.
 
Joined
Aug 7, 2005
Messages
47,985
Reaction score
13,245
"I'm waiting for inspiration to strike. I have chores to do first."

*sigh* When will I learn you don't wait for the muse to visit? You go out to the street and drag her in, screaming, by the hair and chain her to the workstation.

And yes, mine has a name. I even know what she looks like.
 

Sassenach

5 W's & an H
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2005
Messages
2,199
Reaction score
339
Location
Southern Calif.
I get very tired of the dramatic, hyper-romanticized "I have to write...it's like breathing to me" comments.
 

WildScribe

Slave to the Wordcount
Poetry Book Collaborator
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 31, 2006
Messages
6,189
Reaction score
729
Location
Purgatory
I once critiqued a woman's short story on an online critique group. Her main character was Gildo, and one of the other characters said "Gildo? What kind of a stupid name is that?"

She then proceeded to go on a two-page rant about how the strange name was part of the character and how ignorant and immature I was not to realize that, etc. etc. ad nauseum. My reply?

"I didn't say that, it was your dialogue." She never got back to me, but the REST of the critique group apologized for her.
 

Stew21

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Mar 2, 2006
Messages
27,651
Reaction score
9,136
Location
lost in headspace
My name is all over this thread.

"My characters become real to me. I wish I could meet them."
"They continually surprise me."
"I don't outline, it kills the creative flow for me."

I feel like a crackpot when I hear myself say these things. And yes, I have actually said some of them to non-writers which is even worse. I always have to add an aside, that I realize how insane it all sounds and thank them for not calling the whitecoats.
 

Haggis

Evil, undead Chihuahua
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 14, 2005
Messages
56,217
Reaction score
18,303
Location
A dark, evil place.
KTC said:
Actually, come to think of it, mostly everything I've ever said here is probably fitting for this thread. If the mods just want to move all of my writing related posts to this thread...that'll be so much easier than me attempting to do it all by myself. I bet you could find about 200 posts in the poetry forum alone! Everybody there must hate my guts by now?

Don't sell yourself short, Kevin. I'm sure folks in other threads hate you too.
 

MidnightMuse

Midnight Reading
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 23, 2006
Messages
8,424
Reaction score
2,554
Location
In the toidy.
Sassenach said:
I get very tired of the dramatic, hyper-romanticized "I have to write...it's like breathing to me" comments.

This one's my biggest pet-peeve, silly comment from writers all around the globe.

Another version being: "If I couldn't write, I'd die." Or the one that makes my head spin: "I can't not write!"
 

nicegrrl

Banned
Joined
Jul 30, 2006
Messages
389
Reaction score
56
Location
Boston
hmm

I cant wait till I marry someone rich, so I can spend all my days writing.

-- nicegrrl.

How do you know what the genre lacks unless you've read every single book in it?

-- not nicegrrl

Dad, I want to be a novelist.

-- nicegrrl.

I tried to supplement my income from writing with acting jobs.

-- Candace Bushnell.

I love fiction writing. You can just make up anything

-- Ivana Trump.
 

Carrie in PA

Write All The Words!
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 25, 2006
Messages
1,942
Reaction score
1,078
Location
in my own little world
(Said with sneer): Oh, I don't write that sort of thing. I'm an artiste and wouldn't lower myself to write that sort of drivel.
 

Siddow

I'm super! Thanks for asking
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 2, 2006
Messages
2,719
Reaction score
2,056
Location
GA
"I got a personal rejection from Glimmer Train!!! She said my story was a good read! A good read! I'm going to break that market yet!"

Sigh. I didn't have the heart to tell her that they say the same thing to all the gals. And guys. And trolls.
 

Siddow

I'm super! Thanks for asking
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 2, 2006
Messages
2,719
Reaction score
2,056
Location
GA
Oh, I should add my own stupid thing.
At a conference:
Big-time agent says, "So what do you write? I mean, what genre?"
Me: "I don't know."
*smacks forehead*
 

engmajor2005

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Nov 1, 2006
Messages
682
Reaction score
72
Location
North Carolina
I don't say stupid things, much less about writing. I say things that are misconstrued as stupid by non-writers, but in reality every word I say is genius. Pure genius.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some singing to do.

The sky is blue, and all the leaves are green. The sun's as warm as a baked potato...
 

Cav Guy

Living in the backstory
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Nov 14, 2006
Messages
809
Reaction score
146
Location
Montana - About a century too late
"I don't do genre. I write New Yorker-style fiction."

"You don't write so you can't understand me."

"Only a true poet/writer/artist can understand."

"I don't write for the readers! I only write for educated people."

I could go on...
 

Celia Cyanide

Joker Groupie
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 1, 2005
Messages
15,479
Reaction score
2,295
Location
probably watching DARK KNIGHT
Stew21 said:
"I don't outline, it kills the creative flow for me."

I don't think this is a dumb thing to say, in and of itself. I think it's dumb when people say that nobody should ever outline because it's better to discover your story as you go or something like that. Why is an outliner not discovering the story? You are making it up yourself, whether you know your whole story before or after you write it out.

I got another good one...in critique..."You just don't understand my writing because you haven't walked a mile in my shoes."
 

endless rewrite

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jan 28, 2006
Messages
631
Reaction score
262
Location
Uk
Big time meeting with big time production company/ script executive in London. The script I had been invited down to discuss had very recently been optioned by somebody else so she wanted to know what else I had (very little, I was very new and very dumb)

Her: (not quite word for word but almost) I want work that represents me and the way I live, that's why the company brought me in, to develop fresh, young, urban, hip, cool, cutting edge scripts- what have you got?

Me: (small silence) A drama about a knitting group in Southport.

Cue big silence. I recall the meeting ending sometime soon after I had managed to throw a cup of water over myself.

Jesus, that was a long train ride home back to the northern wastelands.

However, I did learn my lesson and spent a year developing a good range of pitches so I would never be stuck like that again with one unsuitable idea, now I have loads of crappy ideas! Plus I recycled the knitting idea for somewhere else.
 

aadams73

A Work in Progress
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2005
Messages
9,901
Reaction score
6,428
Location
Oregon
"My book would make a really good movie!!"

"I don't have to do things the right way because I'll be the exception."

"I'm going to query by phone!"

"Ohhh my manuscript would look lovely on this pink paper."

"Oh, what I meant by that was..." (my absolute pet hate and most of the reason I don't do critiques. The writing has to stand on its own)
 

mooncars

Banned
Flounced
Joined
Nov 25, 2006
Messages
232
Reaction score
52
MidnightMuse said:
This one's my biggest pet-peeve, silly comment from writers all around the globe.

Another version being: "If I couldn't write, I'd die." Or the one that makes my head spin: "I can't not write!"

Agreed! I call this the utmost in pompous bullsh*t! If writing's all you're living for, then do me a favor and stop writing, if you catch my drift.

Lovingly,
Rick
 

Tiger

AKA: "Gums of Steel"
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 18, 2005
Messages
1,879
Reaction score
487
Location
Honolulu
"As a writer... [fill in the blank]"

-D
 
Status
Not open for further replies.