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A disturbing twinkie that has thus far defied scientific understanding

Roxxsmom

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I admit this isn't the usual type of science article posted here ;)

We've all heard the rumor that twinkies are immortal, but that's quite overstated.

Last week, craving sweets, Colin Purrington remembered the Twinkies.

He'd purchased them back in 2012 for sentimental reasons when he heard that Hostess Brands was going bankrupt and Twinkies might disappear forever.

"When there's no desserts in the house, you get desperate," says Purrington, who went down to the basement and retrieved the old box of snack cakes, fully intending to enjoy several.

He busted out the Twinkies now, instead of waiting a couple more years, in part because he was "just so bored, with the pandemic," Purrington says. "It's terrible, but it just is mind-numbing after a while."

Like many people, Purrington believed Twinkies are basically immortal, although the official shelf life is 45 days. He removed a Twinkie from the box, unwrapped it — it looked fine — and took a bite. Then he retched.

"It tasted like old sock," Purrington says. "Not that I've ever eaten old sock."

That's when he examined the other Twinkies. Two looked weird. One had a dark-colored blemish the size of a quarter. The other Twinkie was completely transformed — it was gray, shrunken and wrinkly, like a dried morel mushroom.
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He posted photos on Twitter, and they caught the attention of two scientists: Brian Lovett and Matt Kasson, who study fungi at West Virginia University in Morgantown.

Purrington compared the cross section and filling of a Twinkie from 2012 (left) with one from this year.
Colin Purrington

"Matt is going to want that Twinkie," thought Lovett, the instant he saw the mummified one.
https://www.npr.org/2020/10/15/923411578/a-disturbing-twinkie-that-has-so-far-defied-science
 

Introversion

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Umm, ewwwwwwww! ;)

Okay, I'm known by DW to eat things slightly past their expiration date if they seem uncorrupted. Because, I hate to waste food! And because, I'm a cheap SOB. That said, 8 years expired is well past even my tolerance for adventuresome gastric tightwaddery... Ewwwwwwww...
 

Roxxsmom

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Umm, ewwwwwwww! ;)

Okay, I'm known by DW to eat things slightly past their expiration date if they seem uncorrupted. Because, I hate to waste food! And because, I'm a cheap SOB. That said, 8 years expired is well past even my tolerance for adventuresome gastric tightwaddery... Ewwwwwwww...

People were buying up twinkies en masse a few years back when everyone thought Hostess was going to go under.
 

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*Insert barfing emoji because there isn't one*

I'm gonna echo Introversion's "Ewwwwwwwwwwww"

I am so NOT clicking on your link (sorry Roxxsmom) because there might be pictures and I don't need to see that.
 

MaeZe

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I clicked, because how could you not, and found the image of the morel mushroom Twinkie fascinating.
 

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UHHHHHHGH! I clicked, dang it.

Reminds of this one time when I was a kid and I got a parfait at McDonalds and was too lazy to take the lid out which had a drop of yogurt on it. After a while, the yogurt literally turned into a putty.

Disgusting.
 
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Introversion

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I did chuckle over this:

That's because, in the past, their lab has tested how well molds grow in Peeps, the classic Easter treat. Fungi actually found it difficult to survive on Peeps, because of the food's low water content.

See, even lowly fungi know that Peeps aren’t edible! :hooray:
 

Roxxsmom

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Lol, even kids know peeps aren't for eating but for blowing up in the microwave. Peeps date back to 1953. I'm amazed the things were at all popular before microwaves appeared in people's homes in the 70s.

Food science is rather interesting.

I have always been surprised by the way certain things with lots of sugar and fat, like buttercream frosting, can be out at room temperature for days without going bad. Of course both butter and sugar can be left out too. I was shocked to learn as an adult that some people refrigerate it as compulsively as they do milk. I used to have an argument with a roommate about this, as she thought I was crazy for leaving butter out, and I thought she was crazy for keeping it in the fridge where it would be hard as a rock. She insisted I was going to die from eating softer, room temp butter. She never could answer my question about how does one spread hard butter around evenly on toast when toast cools faster than cold butter melts?

But still, buttercream frosting also has cream in it, which can't be left out at room temperature for very long. I assume the high osmotic pressure created by the sugar retards the growth of the type of bacteria that typically spoil milk? Maybe something similar is operating with peeps, which are pretty much all sugar and gelatin, I am guessing. In any case, I've never become ill from eating cake with buttercream frosting that was stored in a cupboard for a few days, nor have I ever become ill from eating unrefrigerated butter. Supposedly many hard cheeses are safe at room temp too, though I've never tested that.

Still, I wouldn't store a cake for eight years and try to eat it either.
 

MaeZe

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I leave my butter out in a covered dish.

Cheese gets moldy but you can just cut the mold off. I freeze cheese that I can't use in time (because I sometimes buy bulk cheese). As long as you let it thaw at room temperature it prevents crumbling.

Some people I stayed with who didn't have a fridge left eggs out. They last a couple weeks without going bad.
 

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I clicked, and it was fascinating -but, yes, there are images - although not 'gooey'.

But what kind of fool is Purrington, to find an ancient box of Twinkies and not inspect a couple before biting in? It's like buying a bag of apples or potatoes, you don't just grope in, hoping you don't get a slimy one.

I think there is one more 'The Mummy' movie left to make. Mummy springs back to life, rampages slowly through a city - our brave heroes realise that it wants a 'midnight snack', but fresh foods erode it - they remember the mummified Twinkie, give it to the Mummy, who eats it, and goes back to it's sarcophagus to sleep.

Science is cool, although slow.
 

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I’ve never suspected butter of going bad, but in pre-A/C days, I’d refrigerate the butter in the dish because I didn’t want it to melt.
 

Layla Nahar

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I keep it in the fridge. I don't spread it, I just put slices on stuff. I like the feel of unmelted butter.
 

Maryn

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Actually, no. The two sticks of butter I pulled out of the fridge before we moved last fall had a best-by date eleven years past. It appears I bought it right after we replaced the refrigerator, throwing out everything that had been in it. Anyway, the butter's color had separated a little, the outermost bit slightly darker than the rest, but it looked and smelled like ordinary butter. I've never had butter go rancid, and I use it real, real slowly, obviously.

Maryn, who often ignores best-by dates and trusts nose and eyes
 

frimble3

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For eight years though? :ROFL:
If you leave butter out in a dish for that long, you will get mice, or the neighbour's cat, taking care of it long before eight years.
Or worse, raccoons. They don't get those bulky bodies by ignoring free fats.
 

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If you leave butter out in a dish for that long, you will get mice, or the neighbour's cat, taking care of it long before eight years. Or worse, raccoons. They don't get those bulky bodies by ignoring free fats.

Speaking of cats and butter...My mom was gifted a nice butter dish with a lid from her father. My family's cat, Frank, licked and pushed the heavy butter dish from the center of the table to the edge where it fell and broke. So yeah. No butter dish is going to last eight years in my house.
 

Roxxsmom

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Speaking of cats and butter...My mom was gifted a nice butter dish with a lid from her father. My family's cat, Frank, licked and pushed the heavy butter dish from the center of the table to the edge where it fell and broke. So yeah. No butter dish is going to last eight years in my house.

Our cats are awful. They broke my butter bell!

We have to keep the butter in the cupboard, or they'll be at it. Sometimes they manage to get the door open anyway and still leave the telltale raspy tongue marks.

I leave my butter out in a covered dish.

Cheese gets moldy but you can just cut the mold off. I freeze cheese that I can't use in time (because I sometimes buy bulk cheese). As long as you let it thaw at room temperature it prevents crumbling.

Some people I stayed with who didn't have a fridge left eggs out. They last a couple weeks without going bad.

That makes sense, actually. Folks generally didn't have refrigeration in the old days, unless they had access to an ice house or something. At best they had root cellars or terracotta crocks they kept in water to promote evaporative cooling, but that doesn't generally cool things down more than a few degrees (and the crocks don't work at all if it's humid).
 
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E.F.B.

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I clicked this thread because I kept thinking it said "A disturbing twinkle" and thought I should see what it was actually about. That's one nasty twinkie.


Some people I stayed with who didn't have a fridge left eggs out. They last a couple weeks without going bad.
My maternal grandmother did that. Even though my mom knows beyond doubt that they're okay at room temp, she still prefers to keep eggs in the fridge just in case. She will leave ones that she plans to use the same day out on the table, though.
 

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I honestly never thought I would read the sentence, "A cross-section of the dead Twinkie!"

This was fascinating and disturbing. I too thought it said TWINKLE...when I realized it said Twinkie, I had to see...then I stayed to read the whole damn thing, and WHOA.