Is this sentence punctuated correctly?

Gregg Bell

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Is it at least passably punctuationally correct? Thanks.

[FONT=&quot]The airboat hurtled a couple hundred more yards until it plunged into a gully, the engine dead, Earl and Shelby tossed headlong into a mudbank.[/FONT]
 

Maggie Maxwell

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I think it's correct, but it's clunky and confusing. If the engine is dead, then why was it just hurtling along? I think of dead engines as a slow down, not a speedup. You've also got other verbs to work with to separate the tossing into a mudbank as a new and exciting sentence instead of tapped onto the end.
 

Gregg Bell

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I think it's correct, but it's clunky and confusing. If the engine is dead, then why was it just hurtling along? I think of dead engines as a slow down, not a speedup. You've also got other verbs to work with to separate the tossing into a mudbank as a new and exciting sentence instead of tapped onto the end.

Thanks Maggie
 

Chase

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It's correct, Gregg. I see the boat continuing into the gully from inertia after dumping the occupants into the mud.
 

violet_ivy

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It isn't wrong per se, but it IS a bit wordy. I would personally break it into two sentences OR reorganize it so that the sequence of events is more clear.

The airboat hurtled a couple hundred more yards until it plunged into a gully. The force of the impact tossed Earl and Shelley headlong into a mudbank, and the engine sputtered and stopped dead.
The airboat hurtled a couple hundred more yards until it plunged into a gully, killing the engine. Earl and Shelby flew through the air and landed face first in a mudbank.

None of these are "perfect" just examples of how I might revise if it were me.