Energetic Zap - Prologue (Ver 1 and 2) - Advice needed

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Vampiredawn

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I am sorry to inform you of my mistake. I posted this in the wrong section. If you would like to read this please go to the share you work area. When I reach the requirements and such I’ll repost it. Till then have fun and stay healthy
 
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Aegrin

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Second version sounded definitely more interesting too me. Keep in mind that I like everything space-related. In my humble opinion I would rather rework it so it is less infodumping. Grip the reader with actual storyline and place hints about the past so it subtly peeks readers interest to want to know more. And then, later on, show the readers more. Just my suggestion :)
 

Vampiredawn

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My issue is I don’t know how I would write any more of the alien and probes without it being filler or causing issues with other plans. I don’t want the aliens to show up for a long time (maybe books if I get enough momentum going and ideas on virtual paper). First comes sickness, death, civilization collapse. Then survival, experimenting with powers, rebuilding and “questing”. I’m going for a more magic from technology vibe without anyone knowing it until rebuilding or maybe a mad scientist discovers the nanites as technology is required and most tech is taken out. Maybe time to rewrite some of the plot to fit the altered prologue and flush it out as well as cut it up. Give me a day or 5 to come up with a reworked version 2 for you
 

Vampiredawn

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Ok...I’ll delete this post in a little bit (give you time to get this reply) and go there. Thank you much
 

zanzjan

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Thread closed. Vampiredawn, when you have a thread in SYW, PM me the link and I'll add it to the bottom of this thread. Thanks (-:

-Zanz, mod
 
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