Characters of Color?

Oriole Adams

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When writing a short romance fiction (800 words), how does one indicate that the characters happen to be African-American? I've read many critiques elsewhere that People of Color are under-represented in such stories, but current style guides advise against describing a black person's skin color by comparing it to food or drink. That is, it's acceptable (from an editorial standpoint) to describe a Caucasian protagonist as having a "peaches and cream" complexion, but taboo to describe an African-American heroine to have a "cafe au lait" complexion. In the case of an actual novel, the cover art gives some indication as to who the characters are, but what about a short story included in a weekly magazine? How to make it apparent (without being "obvious") that your characters are African-American?
 

Maryn

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My understanding, based on a detailed tumbler post that I don't seem to have bookmarked, is that using coffee and chocolate to describe the skin color of characters has multiple faults. One, it's a cliche--and so are honey, brown sugar, caramel, etc. Two, it fetishizes, reducing the character to the skin color like there's nothing more. And three, it smacks of colonialism--those were two of the main crops made profitable by slave labor.

People of color have made it clear they find being compared to food items offensive, so even if a white writer thinks of a great, original food comparison that they think is flattering, it's best not to do it. When a write writer chooses to compare a white character to peaches and cream--or home-made pizza dough, or marzipan, or the foam on a beer--it's not the most apt, either. (My sister and both my kids are the approximate blue-tinged white of fat-free milk, but they don't care for the comparison.)

What you can do is use color names that don't offend, for any color of skin. The names of spices, herbs, animals, minerals, and plants or blossoms are generally inoffensive.

Without signs the character is not white, readers' minds default to "white character," so you do need to work in clear indicators the character is a person of color in other ways. This can include speech patterns and vocabulary, fashion, hair, facial features, how they decorate their homes, and anything else you might use to describe and illuminate any character. What's important is to make your character of color a whole, rounded character, not a token about whom we can envision only the exact skin color, right?

Maryn, kind of strawberry yogurt color before you mix in the fruit at the bottom
 

Woollybear

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Or names. Shaquille is not likely, e.g., anglican. (caveat, caveat, caveat.) Of course that last name might be Catholic.

Hussein is another one.

You get the idea.

(I like Maryn's answer, BTW.)
 
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lizmonster

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There have been a number of discussions about this on AW.

I am a white woman, but here's my take:

If you want your readers to understand your characters are not white, mention skin color. Readers tend to assume white if you don't specify (and sometimes even if you do). Do better with your analogies (I recommend Writing with Color as a place to start).

Also, mention the skin color of your white characters as well. Sighted people nearly always notice skin tone, no matter what it is. If you leave out skin color descriptions for a specific set of characters, that says a lot about how you're seeing the world.

There's also the cultural aspect, about which there have also been numerous discussions here. I strongly encourage you to seek those out as well.
 

ChaseJxyz

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You shouldn't be relying on cover art to tell you who's who. Before you read a single word, you don't know who those characters are. If there's a black character on the cover, and nowhere in the text does it mention skin tone or body features, how would you know which character that should be? In America, people in books are assumed white unless we're explicitly told otherwise, which is why so many people got upset that they "made" Rue black in the Hunger Games Films, even though the text said otherwise. Look at things and notice if skin color is explained in detail for white people, or the eye shape of white people, or the texture of white hair. Why do we not do that, but describe Asian eyes or black hair?

Writing with Color is a really good blog that has a lot of info on it. Here's the page specifically on skintones that I have bookmarked. Feel free to look around at other things. If for some reason you're completely allergic to physical descriptions, you can always go by names. No one is going to look at the name Chidi Anagonye and think "white guy." But if they are African-American then you run the risk of using stereotypical names. Other people looking at your work before you publish can help a lot with this stuff.
 

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I will ask an insensitive question. Is your character black because it matters that they are black? Or are you wanting a black character in your story because you think you should? I am being blunt, if it matters, if there is some specific reason to know ethnicity, then state it. If there's not, don't force something.
 

FletcherHavarti

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Writing with Color is a really good blog that has a lot of info on it. Here's the page specifically on skintones that I have bookmarked. Feel free to look around at other things. If for some reason you're completely allergic to physical descriptions, you can always go by names. No one is going to look at the name Chidi Anagonye and think "white guy." But if they are African-American then you run the risk of using stereotypical names. Other people looking at your work before you publish can help a lot with this stuff.

I'll just echo that last bit: In my first novel I tried to indicate a character's ethnicity using speech patterns, and when I ran this by my beta readers their response was, "Umm, no." It came across as offensive and I was grateful for the feedback so I could change it.

Nice shout-out to Chidi, by the way -- may he rest in peace.
 

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I'm not sure which POV you're using (and that may affect how you do this), but...
Why can't you just state that they're Black or African-American?
And you can just describe skin as "brown" if you like. See this tumblr for other ideas: http://writingwithcolor.tumblr.com/post/96830966357/writing-with-color-description-guide-words-for

ETA: Sometimes you have to be very obvious about it or readers will simply not get it, alas. (See, for example, what happened with Rue in The Hunger Games. People saw the movies and were surprised she was Black...even though she was described as having dark brown skin.) I'm usually very clear about race, because I don't want anyone to misinterpret. Also when we see someone for the first time, we often make a quick determination of their likely racial background automatically. As someone who is biracial, people are often unable to make that determination with me, and thus I'm often asked for my background from people who don't even know my name, because it bugs them that they can't slot me into a box right away.
 
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LJD

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I will ask an insensitive question. Is your character black because it matters that they are black? Or are you wanting a black character in your story because you think you should? I am being blunt, if it matters, if there is some specific reason to know ethnicity, then state it. If there's not, don't force something.

Because most readers will assume the character is white by default if not told otherwise.
 

InkFinger

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My point was, don't force it. If the character's ethnicity is important to the story, then simply state the fact and support it with detail. If ethnicity is being included just to include it, then don't.

As for what people see, I think people see themselves and the people they know. It's not a scientific assumption, but it is a loosely supported anecdote that I've picked up over the years. Readers see themselves in the stories they read, unless we tell them otherwise. I've asked the question on and off over the years and get consistent replies, race, color, creed, sex, and sexuality included.

I do not presume what my readers will see, and I value their imagination quite highly.
 
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Roxxsmom

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There have been a number of discussions about this on AW.

I am a white woman, but here's my take:

If you want your readers to understand your characters are not white, mention skin color. Readers tend to assume white if you don't specify (and sometimes even if you do). Do better with your analogies (I recommend Writing with Color as a place to start).

Also, mention the skin color of your white characters as well. Sighted people nearly always notice skin tone, no matter what it is. If you leave out skin color descriptions for a specific set of characters, that says a lot about how you're seeing the world.

What she said! It's still really common for writers (and readers) to assume white is the default, whether the setting be the modern US or a SF setting or a fantasy world. White people have the privilege of being the "unmarked" state in western societies in particular, however diverse most are nowadays, and western societies have an outsize influence and representation in media worldwide. Mentioning skin tone for all characters for whom a physical description is important can help offset that. Some people argue that writers shouldn't mention race at all, but that tends to lead to most readers assuming the characters are all White.

It does get complex, though, when writing in viewpoint, whether first or a limited third pov, because perhaps a given character is a product of their time and place (as in historical fiction or fiction set in many parts of contemporary America) where Whiteness is unmarked, and they don't even notice race unless the person isn't White. There have also been discussions of how to write a novel from the pov of a character who is racist, not even malevolently so, but in that oblivious way that has been (and still is) incredibly common, but without appearing to endorse this as an author, especially if a novel takes place in a time and a place where racial terms considered offensive today were used without malice.

The best suggestion I can make for that is to make sure it's clear you're showing things through the viewpoint of a character, not a stand in for the author, and to show consequences and other characters' responses to the pov character's blind spots when feasible.
 

Helix

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My point was, don't force it. If the character's ethnicity is important to the story, then simply state the fact and support it with detail. If ethnicity is being included just to include it, then don't.

As for what people see, I think people see themselves and the people they know. It's not a scientific assumption, but it is a loosely supported anecdote that I've picked up over the years. Readers see themselves in the stories they read, unless we tell them otherwise. I've asked the question on and off over the years and get consistent replies, race, color, creed, sex, and sexuality included.

I do not presume what my readers will see, and I value their imagination quite highly.


What you presume is not universal. As LJD, Lizmonster and Maryn have said, white is the default colour for characters. (And they all said it better.)
 

Roxxsmom

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There have been a number of discussions about this on AW.

I am a white woman, but here's my take:

If you want your readers to understand your characters are not white, mention skin color. Readers tend to assume white if you don't specify (and sometimes even if you do). Do better with your analogies (I recommend Writing with Color as a place to start).

Also, mention the skin color of your white characters as well. Sighted people nearly always notice skin tone, no matter what it is. If you leave out skin color descriptions for a specific set of characters, that says a lot about how you're seeing the world.

What she said! It's still really common for writers (and readers) to assume white is the default, whether the setting be the modern US or a SF setting or a fantasy world. White people have the privilege of being the "unmarked" state in western societies in particular, however diverse most are nowadays, and western societies have an outsize influence and representation in media worldwide. Mentioning skin tone for all characters for whom a physical description is important can help offset that. Some people argue that writers shouldn't mention race at all, but that tends to lead to most readers assuming the characters are all White as well as ignoring the way race influences a person's exp

It does get complex, though, when writing in viewpoint, whether first or a limited third pov, because perhaps a given character is a product of their time and place (as in historical fiction or fiction set in many parts of contemporary America) where Whiteness is unmarked, and they don't even notice race unless the person isn't White. There have also been discussions of how to write a novel from the pov of a character who is racist, not even malevolently so, but in that oblivious way that has been (and still is) incredibly common, but without appearing to endorse this as an author, especially if a novel takes place in a time and a place where racial terms considered offensive today were used without malice.

The best suggestion I can make for that is to make sure it's clear you're showing things through the viewpoint of a character, not a stand in for the author, and to show consequences and other characters' responses to the pov character's blind spots when feasible.

As for what people see, I think people see themselves and the people they know. It's not a scientific assumption, but it is a loosely supported anecdote that I've picked up over the years. Readers see themselves in the stories they read, unless we tell them otherwise. I've asked the question on and off over the years and get consistent replies, race, color, creed, sex, and sexuality included.

This isn't necessarily true. In a society where Whiteness is generally presented as the unmarked norm, readers of all races will tend to "see" characters as White, unless race is specifically described or mentioned. This is doubly true if the character is presented as a person who is not affected or influenced by race and whose culture lacks elements unambiguously associated with a particular race or nationality. Heck, sometimes people see characters as White, even when the author makes it clear they are not.
 

Oriole Adams

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My characters are African-American, but not for any particular plot point reason, I just cast them that way... more or less for the heck of it. This story is for a weekly magazine with a diverse readership, and since a good 90% of the romances seem to feature White characters, I wanted to present a similarly romantic story of two people meeting featuring Characters of Color. But being limited to 800 words there isn't enough space to describe much more than their physical appearance (as is typical with the stories in this mag) - that is, no room to describe things like home decor as suggested above, and I certainly don't want to use jargon or stereotypical speech patterns.

I'm hoping that a white person using black characters doesn't come across as pandering...after all, many gay authors write stories that strictly feature straight people, and there are African-American writers who use only white characters in their stories.
 

ChaseJxyz

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A white person having POC characters isn't pandering. If you're doing it because you feel like you need to so someone on the Internet won't call you a racist, then yeah, it's not a good look. POC want to see stories about characters like them that aren't rooted in racism or systematic oppression (like how gay and trans people want stories other than how their lives are miserable for being queer), so a romance story that's just a romance story is fine. I think your best bet is to have your character be described as black either by having a name from an African country or through a description (He couldn't help but stare, how her yellow dress contrasted against her umber skin). The 800 word limit is going to be your biggest challenge! Good luck.
 

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I'm a brown woman - British born, of Indian descent - and I don't find 'food and drink' descriptions offensive, but that's probably because in the Bengali Hindu culture (and no doubt outside of it) people use hilarious terms like 'wheatish' to describe complexions! However, I wouldn't encourage it, as it does make me laugh when I read that sort of thing in novels. I can't take descriptions like that seriously; it's distracting, and it doesn't help me visualise the person all that much.

I completely agree that when writing a work of fiction, you really need to make it clear if the character is not white. I always assume that the protagonist will be white when picking up a novel, unless it's made really clear from the blurb/I know about the novel in advance.

Also, this:

A white person having POC characters isn't pandering. If you're doing it because you feel like you need to so someone on the Internet won't call you a racist, then yeah, it's not a good look. POC want to see stories about characters like them that aren't rooted in racism or systematic oppression (like how gay and trans people want stories other than how their lives are miserable for being queer), so a romance story that's just a romance story is fine. I think your best bet is to have your character be described as black either by having a name from an African country or through a description (He couldn't help but stare, how her yellow dress contrasted against her umber skin). The 800 word limit is going to be your biggest challenge! Good luck.

You're getting a lot of excellent advice here, so this is just my two cents!
 
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Saying you shouldn't compare people to coffee and such is not saying that you can't mention skin tone. Just say her skin is brown. There's nothing wrong with using a simple and clear description like that.

It's also totally fine to say someone is Black or African-American... you don't have to dance around it as though those words are lava.

Not all flowery skin descriptions I've seen have been offensive, but they pretty much always come across as really weird as the writer ties everything up in knots in an attempt to avoid saying it plain.
 

Marian Perera

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I'll never forget the blurb which said "...all he could think about was her long, slender mocha colored dancer legs wrapped high around his cream colored thighs."

And together they made a frappucino colored baby.

As a PoC, I'm fine with being called simply brown, and I'd be just as okay with reading that a character has brown skin.
 

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After reading this thread, out of curiosity I went to reread a WIP of mine in which none of the main characters are white. In the first three-thousand-some words, the only references to color I found were that "she was paler than her mother," and that a friend of hers was blonde. :Shrug:

Exactly how soon do people think this needs to be mentioned before it’s too late for readers to accept "not white"?

Also, in a previous discussion of character names and how they would be pronounced, the point was made that readers will never see your characters exactly the way you do, — Actually, in trying to figure out how to phrase this question, I think I answered myself. "Not white" is not enough because it implies there are two options, so you probably do need something less vague than “brown”, right?
 

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Exactly how soon do people think this needs to be mentioned before it’s too late for readers to accept "not white"?

The truth is, depending on the story you're telling, some readers will never notice.

Told this tale before, but: I write far future SF, and as such my characters are not a pack of white people. One of my MCs is explicitly Black. I mention this once in the first book (I was still a naive "I want people to picture whoever they want, so I won't describe my characters!" writer when it was first drafted). In the second book, I mention it often, AND that MC is on the cover.

When my mom (who'd read both books) saw the draft cover for the second book, she said "Gorgeous! Who's the guy?"

And when my third book came out, one reader said wistfully on FB he wished one of the three covers had shown this MC.

My biggest error, I think, was giving the character a vaguely European name, and I'd do it differently now. But people reflexively picturing white characters is a pretty strong barrier to overcome.
 

ChaseJxyz

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Exactly how soon do people think this needs to be mentioned before it’s too late for readers to accept "not white"?

The Writing with Color blog said "as soon as possible;" what I wrote for my editing to-do list is "get skin tone + 1 identifying feature described in first scene a character visually appears." So the plan would be stuff like "emerald green phoenix that has a prosthetic foot" or "human who's black and always has a wolf with her." That way the reader can have a good idea of who the character looks like in their head and not get surprised/taken out of the narrative if I mention it much, much later. The identifying feature tells us something about the character, whether it's status or personality or what they do, and it gives something other characters can reference (e.g. saying "that black girl" is vague or implies there's only one black girl in this part of the world, but "that girl with the wolf" could only refer to one person. Plus it's probably the thing that's going to stick in someone's mind more than skin color, unless, again, she's the only black person in this part of the world).
 

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I have been having similar questions in my own work. I had no idea that comparing to food or drink is considered insulting. The problem with my work is that I rarely describe a character's particular skin tone, hair or eye color because I like the idea of the reader putting her or himself into the mind or body of the character-- usually the main character. Other side-characters I will describe in detail. I do not like the trope where the character passes a mirror stops and starts to pick at their "too large nose" or whatever. But even then I can say, has a nice smile, has a scar on the chin, is athletic or boney without mentioning race at all.