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Are there problems with my characters' names?

The Second Moon

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Questions for you to answer are in bold.

I shared the first bit of my MG short story collection in the 200 words SYW thread. Some people had issues with one of my POV characters' name. (it's in 3rd person) His name is Joshua-Gabe. I'm used to it so I don't see a problem with it being clunky/awkward/bogging down the narrative like people said.

Do you think the name "Joshua-Gabe" as being too clunky/awkward/bogging down the narrative?

Also Joshua-Gabe's parents' names are Charles and Carley. I call them by their first names in the narrative (not in Joshua-Gabe's dialogue, though).

Are the names Charles and Carley too similar?


There is a girl who is friend with and has a crush on Joshua-Gabe. Her name is Jeganna (she's an alien)

Do the names Joshua-Gabe and Jeganna look too much alike?

Woo. There are all my questions. Have at it friends.
 

Torill

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To be honest, Joshua-Gabe looks strange and awkward to me, and yes, clunky, too (but then again, English is not my first language, so …) Joshua and Gabe are very different type names, that's one reason why they may not work so well together. Both of them would be fine on their own, of course. Is there a reason for the double name?

I do think Charles and Carley are way too similar, yes. But not Joshua-Gabe and Jeganna necessarily. Joshua and Jeganna, on the other hand ...
 

Enlightened

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For the sake of reading each character numerous times throughout the entire collection of short stories, I can see readers being frustrated having the names too similarly spelled (Charles and Carley; Joshua and Jeganna). I can see how a reader might get upset making it a harder read for them having to read/pronounce an extra name (Joshua-Gabe). Maybe spell his name out the first time and refer to him as JG (as a nick, like DJ)?
 

angeliz2k

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Honestly, it's a little hard to tell out of context. It will depend a lot on how the characters interact and how you use their names versus pronouns. I don't have any problem with Joshua-Gabe, though it's a bit odd to have the full name "Joshua" paired with the nickname "Gabe". I can see how Charles and Carley could be confusing--both start with C, have "arl" directly following the C, and end with "e-". So, they're close. I don't feel like Joshua-Gabe and Jeganna are too close. I don't see anything inherently wrong with using those names.

However. If readers are telling you it doesn't work, then it doesn't. Make sure you have a large enough sample size to really determine it isn't working for readers, and make sure you're taking into account who these readers are. Are they your target audience? If enough readers who you could reasonably expect to be your audience are telling you the names are confusing, then I would change the names.
 
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The Second Moon

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However. If readers are telling you it doesn't work, then it doesn't. Make sure you have a large enough sample size to really determine it isn't working for readers, and make sure you're taking into account who these readers are. Are they your target audience? If enough readers who you could reasonably expect to be your audience are telling you the names are confusing, then I would change the names.

You might be right about the sample size. Maybe 200 words wasn't enough to judge if Joshua-Gabe's name bogs down the narrative too much.

I will think about changing Charles or Carley's name and playing with Joshua-Gabe's name.
 

angeliz2k

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You might be right about the sample size. Maybe 200 words wasn't enough to judge if Joshua-Gabe's name bogs down the narrative too much.

I will think about changing Charles or Carley's name and playing with Joshua-Gabe's name.

I was thinking sample size in terms of the number of people providing feedback, but you're also absolutely right that it's hard to judge based on 200 words.
 

CathleenT

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As a general rule, it's unwise to duplicate the first letter when naming characters, if at all possible, to make it easier on the reader. This was really a problem when I wrote my Greek mythology novel (Athena, Ares, Aphrodite, Achilles, etc.), but you're not stuck with existing characters.

I'd definitely change Charles and/or Carley. Those are way too close. That sort of thing happens in real life, but fiction is supposed to be better organized. Of the two, Charles seems the most vanilla.

Joshua-Gabe is a bit much for daily wear-and-tear, coming in as it does with four syllables. Since Jeganna also states with a J, consider calling your MC simply Gabe (or something else that doesn't start with a J).

Hope this helps. : )
 
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indianroads

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I try to make my characters names such that they don't have odd spellings - so they're not a hiccup in a sentence - and watch that names of characters don't rhyme. One way to do this, and still have interesting names, is to look up common names through history - do a search on common names from the 1700's for example.
 

neandermagnon

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It does seem to me that Joshua-Gabe would have acquired a nickname, it's quite a high effort set of syllables

That was my thought too. Also, isn't Gabe short for Gabriel? They seem a bit mismatched because Joshua is the full version of the name while Gabe is a short version. AFAIK both names are Hebrew/Biblical origin so they are well-pared from that point of view.

On the other hand, what your character is called depends on his parents. I name characters on the basis of what their parents would call them, given their parents' backgrounds. If it fits with their background that he gets a fairly clunky double-barrel first name, then go with it. Maybe it's something that could be commented on by other characters. Maybe your character doesn't like his name being shortened and gets annoyed if people call him Josh or JG. Or maybe he's fine being known as Josh or JG. Or Joshie if you want a more affectionate sounding short version.

Re Charles and Carley - maybe change the spelling of Carley... Karlie perhaps. The reason they look too similar to me is that Carley is only one letter away from Charley which is short for Charles (albeit Charlie is a more common spelling) so basically the same name.
 

neandermagnon

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On clunky names, wasn't there an old series of books about Milly Molly Mandy - short for Millicent Margaret Amanda (if I've remembered it right)? I quite like characters with distinctive names, but people being people will shorten them.


ETA: if you really like the characters' names as they are, keep them. A clunky name can be part of what makes a character who they are.
 
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Cobalt Jade

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I think Joshua-Gabe is very clunky. Would it be for a middle grade student? I don't know. They might like the uniqueness, or get annoyed at the hyphen as an adult might.

There's only a handful of hyphenated names, IMO, that read smoothly, and that's only because they are in common usage: Ann-Marie, for example, or the French style of naming like Jean-Claude.

Charles and Carley, as someone else called out, do sound too much alike. Changing the spelling of Carley to Karly would help.

I don't have a problem with Jeganna and Josh as a couple.
 
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Bufty

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For what it's worth. Joshua-Gabe does not run easily off the tongue - my tongue at least. I'm pretty sure that name would have very quickly earned its owner a nickname - perhaps JG - at least in dialogue.

I wouldn't use both Charles and Carley. They are too similar.
 

The Second Moon

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Joshua-Gabe's name is important for his little sister. His little sister is Ellamae. She gets jealous of Joshua-Gabe and thinks that she was only born because her parents thought he was so great, hence her name is a double like his. (Joshua & Gabe) and (Ella & Mae).

Granted, the little sister isn't POV chacter but she is still important.
 

mrsmig

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If you want Joshua-Gabe as your MC's name, and it's going to make you unhappy to call him anything else, then use it.

If your plan is to self-publish this book, you'll have the freedom to do as you please. However, if you're hoping to get a trade publishing deal, be prepared for agents/publishers to suggest (or even insist upon) other names, for all the reasons cited above.
 

kyliesmiley16

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Personally, I like Joshua-Gabe, but then, I've always liked the name Joshua. I think it sounds fine, but agreed it does look clunky, which is probably not best for a main character. A nickname, whatever you choose, would probably be the better way to refer to him for the majority of the story. Perhaps only his parents that call him that. Does he like his name? If yes, then maybe the nicknames annoy him.

I have more of a problem with Jeganna. Visually, it looks like Jenga (that towering blocks game). Is it pronounced Jeg-anna? Or Je-garn-a? Or a silent g? But, I guess alien names are different ;)
 

frimble3

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In a middle grade book, I'm okay with Charles and Carley for parents, because parents are usually referred to by children as 'Mom' and 'Dad' or whatever title your family uses.
So it's not like Charles and Carley are going to get a lot of use, except in narration, where it should be fairly clear who is being referred to, or, not very important. 'A parental unit' opened the door.' And, the 'matching' names will remind the readers that these are the parents. (As long as all the friends aren't named Chuck, Chachi, Karl, Kenny, etc.)

As to 'Joshua-Gabe', it sounds lengthy, clunky and unrealistic. How many of his friends are going to bother with the whole thing? Even in a really Biblical area, Joshua or Gabriel should be sufficient. And, shortening 'Gabe' feels like even the parents thought it was a bit of a mouthful.
Maybe he goes by some variant of one of those, and hearing 'Joshua-Gabe' or 'Joshua Gabriel' lets him know that he's annoyed a parent or teacher in some way.
In my tests, 'John Gabriel' is less clunky, but 'John Gabe' makes me wonder why they kept the 'Gabe'. Unless they had 6 kids named John, and were desperate.

As to the alien, naming aliens is not my bag.
 
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Sage

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Charles and Carley are definitely too close. Especially because you'll probably be using them in situations where you could potentially be referring to one or the other (in parenting situations).

For some people, having characters with the same first letters in their name makes it one-step more likely that I might mix them up. But it becomes a lot more likely the more letters they share. Charles and Carley share 5 letters in the same order (with an H interrupting in the former). No way I could keep them straight. Joshua-Gabe and Jeganna have enough different letters in there, and especially without sharing the first vowel, that I would have very little problem with them, though you might end up on my "author loves that letter" shelf on Goodreads.

OTOH, I do find Joshua-Gabe a little strange to call a character all the time. Then again, I have no problem with "Charles Wallace" in the Wrinkle in Time books, so I'd prolly get used to it.
 

PamelaC

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I like the name Joshua/Josh and I like the name Gabriel/Gabe, but I'm not a big fan of Joshua-Gabe. It's a stumbling block to me. I'm not a big fan of "unique" names though, especially in my fiction. I'm not saying everyone needs to be named John and Jane (I actually like both names though), but names can be interesting without having to be a stumbling block. I find names in the fantasy genre tend to be the biggest offenders. If I have to pause to figure out how in the heck one would even pronounce a name, I'm already thinking about putting the book back.

Obviously none of your names are in that category, but they still interrupt the flow, IMO. I'd get annoyed by "Joshua-Gabe" after the first few pages, and I'd always notice the similarity of Charles and Carly. I'd wonder why the author chose those names instead of something else. And there I am, completely out of the story, thinking about things I'm sure you don't want me thinking about.

I'd change him to Gabe, and maybe call Charles some other random dad name like David or Mike or something. But it's your story, so you don't have to listen to any of my advice, LOL!
 

The Second Moon

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Then again, I have no problem with "Charles Wallace" in the Wrinkle in Time books, so I'd prolly get used to it.

That's a good example.

If you want Joshua-Gabe as your MC's name, and it's going to make you unhappy to call him anything else, then use it.

You're right.

Changing the spelling of Carley to Karly would help.

Yes! That would help. I'll do that with her name.
 

Bing Z

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Disclaimer: I read the 200-word excerpts and I made comment about the use of the MC's name there.

Joshua-Gabe, as a character's name, is a little mouthful for me, but it is all right. My feeling about it was more about the use in the excerpts. There is like a 'Joshua-Gabe' every paragraph or two and it became taxing reading. That was why I suggested a less formal way of referring to him in the narrative.

Also, what does Joshua-Gabe think about his name, or what do his peers call him and what will those behaviors affect JG? For example, will they poke fun of his name and cause him to have negative feeling about it or to defend his name? What does he prefer to be called by peers (and thus the author)? Some characterization built into him about a somehow uncommon name? **

As for Charlie and Carley, it is indeed confusing (and Sage's suggestion is brilliant). And IIRC JG calls his father "Dad." So do we need to know at that point what the dad's name is? Will it be more natural to have it revealed when mom or dad's old friend shows up and calls him by his name (or even a nickname)?

** In a (now trunked) YA contemporary, I have a male character named Kim Maria (both can be legitimately used as masculine names) and he hates it; instead he insists to be called KM and will do bad things to people who call him Kim and/or Maria. Thus, in the narrative he is called KM.
 
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TellMeAStory

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Yes, Joshua-Gabe is awkward in many, many ways, BUT, OP isn't naming a baby, but a character. For a baby, you might want a name denoting taste and respect, easy to pronounce, etc. etc. But for a character, you want a name that's memorable. Joshua-Gabe could go really well for an awkward or--even more amusing to me--an especially graceful character.

As for the names Charlie and Carley, they do both start with the letter "C," but the sound of "ch" is not the same as for "c," so by me, it's not worth worrying about. And the J names are significantly different as well. No worries there either.

My advice to OP is to keep writing your story with the names that seem right to you. If, at some later date, you
want to change them, that's what control-f is for. Easy-peasy.
 

Sarahrizz

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Questions for you to answer are in bold.

Do you think the name "Joshua-Gabe" as being too clunky/awkward/bogging down the narrative?

It sounds a bit clunky for every instance. If you want to introduce him as Joshua-Gabe then have a shortened version you use through the rest of the piece, I think it'll work. Like, what do his friends call him: Josh, Joshua, Gabe, whatever you like. If you still want his parents to use his full name in dialogue, that'll be fine. But I don't know of anyone else who'll keep calling someone a four syllable name without shortening it.

Also Joshua-Gabe's parents' names are Charles and Carley. I call them by their first names in the narrative (not in Joshua-Gabe's dialogue, though).

Are the names Charles and Carley too similar?

On the one hand, distinguishing between them may be hard. Though since they are a pair, husband and wife, and mom and dad, giving them similar names might not be a bad idea. It groups them together.


There is a girl who is friend with and has a crush on Joshua-Gabe. Her name is Jeganna (she's an alien)

Do the names Joshua-Gabe and Jeganna look too much alike?

Well, my opinion is they are different enough I can easily tell the difference with blurry vision from tired eyes. Plus if you shorten Joshua-Gabe like I said above, they will be even less similar. Jeganna is easy to figure out how to pronounce too, which can be a common issue for made up names.
 

Cobalt Jade

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Slightly OT/ I hated Charles Wallace as a name. So pretentious. But I still gave A Wrinkle in Time 5 stars.