Hi, my name is _____ and I’m a Nom de Plume reincarnated!

Hey everyone!

Wonderful community. Are pseudonyms allowed on the forum to protect one’s identity? I’m only asking because I am in desperate need of some advice which I can’t share openly.

Disastrously desperate.

Hope y’all are having a blast!

Hahahahah! Thank you!

I had to read your reply twice before fully understanding it - blame fatigue and my insane sanity for this awkward gaffe.

I am a puffy cat who likes long walks on the beach, travelling, and living life off the beaten path. I am looking for other cats between the ages of 1 CY (Cat Year) and 4 CY. Memories are allowed, because I am all alone in the moonlight. I can dream of the old days, because I was beautiful then. If anyone* is interested in a five-day courtship (maximum time allowed under the International Feline Marriage Act of 1801) kindly send a letter via mouse mail to:

1111 Memory Lane
Streetlamp 2B
Hate Humans Village
New Yorkies
U ESS AY

*Non-Catnippers preferred, must hate dogs and humans, must be aligned with the values of The Church of Nietzsche, and absolutely no unsolicited pictures of your p**** (paws - damn censors!) allowed!

My alter ego - the human one - does not allow any form of injustice or inequality. He is an activist. But as a fat cat, we have been at war with dogs and our slaves, humansssss, since Mother Cat gave birth to our kind many CY ago in a land far, far away called “Eeegyppt”.

(I stole the human thing’s “eyephone”)

Miawoami.

I MIGHT HAVE POSTED THIS ALREADY... My paws tapped on that other odd button above instead of this fastidious reply of posting button below.