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Looking for beta reader for MG animal fantasy

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A.P.M.

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Greetings,

I'm on the hunt for a beta reader or two for my lower MG animal fantasy. It is 36000 words. I think the end is lacking something and I'm not sure what. The story doesn't have the oomph I was hoping for. I read a lot of MG but this is my first time writing it, so I'd appreciate thoughts on the MG voice as well. I like harsh critiquers who can point out where a story is going off the rails and who can point out big-picture flaws, like pacing or voice issues.

I'd be happy to read an MG in return, preferably another animal fantasy (I love the genre). Animal fantasy or not, though, I'd also want to take a look at your first page and query to make sure it's up my alley.

The query/blurb:

When the little mammoth is let outside the laboratory for the first time, she realizes things like birds and trees are real. And that must mean the other pictures in her tiny room, the pictures of huge furry animals with trunks and tusks just like her who live in the snow, must be real too. But when she figures out a way outside the walls to try and find them, the humans who once took care of her try to trap her inside.

The little mammoth runs away to try and find the ones in the pictures. She gets help from new friends who teach her how to find food and water. And when the snows come, she heads north, certain she will soon find the ones like her. But as she walks across snowy, empty plains, she meets one of the last condors, who knows all about the strange things humans do. He tells her that the pictures on her walls were lies. There are no creatures like her left anywhere in the world.

Hungry and alone, she must turn back, or she will die. Only words from a passing flock of geese keep hope in her heart. If she can brave the heat of the south, past wolf territory and rumbling bison, she may find a family of creatures at least a little like her.

But if the humans find her again, they will capture her—and she will be alone forever.

You can find the first page here: https://absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?342168-The-Little-Mammoth-Chapter-one

Please pop me a PM if you think this is something you'd like to critique!
 
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