Pronouns in Author Bios

shadowsminder

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Hello! Do you worry about how readers will react to your pronouns? Do you want to talk about it?
 
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shadowsminder

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I'd like to state on social media that my pronouns are they/he (as in they/them except for the people who only know how to use the binary pronouns) even when my images are feminine. I also worry doing that will be like that one time I walked into my manager's office to talk openly about job tension but had to deal with him lunging over half his desk to scream insults in my face.
 

Bufty

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Hi, aspirit. No, and no. Not sure I understand the connection between your thread title and the following questions.

To me at least, there are more important things in life to worry about than how total strangers might react to how I use pronouns in any possible author bio. :Hug2:
 
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shadowsminder

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Thank you for responding, Bufty.

For clarification: "Do you worry about how readers will react to your pronouns [as presented in your bios]? Do you want to talk about it [in this thread for that]?"

I imagine its nice to worry only about the highest priority things in life. To me, considering the little things is a way of preventing attacks on the big things. This particular little thing is possibly not worth a thread on a writing site.
 

SWest

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It's a totally worthwhile topic. But the answer to your questions is mostly It Depends.

Are you living somewhere where you would be safe-and-able to be open in public? It ain't as hard as it used to be to identify people from pen names. If people wanted to locate, stalk and threaten you, what are your local legal and financial resources like?

Add to that all the opinions that *We-Have-A-Right-To-Know!* or *What-About-People-Who-Don't-Have-a-Choice-But-To-Disclose?!?*. But this is Your life, and your decision to base on your own experience, your ability to project the future outcomes (I think your brain is older than 25? I'm pretty sure), and your own personal stake in the world. At This Time. Knowing What You Know. Feeling How You Feel. Which doesn't mean you can't change your mind later on.

You really have to wrestle the issue through to find how long this piece of string is To You.


I'd like to note that it is possible to write biographical text in a way that avoids pronouns without coming across as coy or deceptive.

-Westie, who lives in a tiny house in the woods, and can frequently be found lying under a pile of dogs
 

Bufty

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My mistake, aspirit. I didn't get it until I read Swest's reply. Apologies.
 

Curlz

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You are worrying about what somebody is thinking while they are sitting in their home? That's a bit far fetched. Whatever they are thinking about your pronouns, it's in their head and they are probably not even saying it aloud, and they may be miles away from you. But you worry? Why?
 

Bufty

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I think the purpose of this Forum is to cover such cases - the concerns you and I don't follow or fully grasp but which apparently exist.
 
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AW Admin

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You get to decide how you present yourself, and how you want people to interact with you. Are you out and open everywhere? Or just some places?

As SWest wisely notes, it's quite possible to write a bio without pronouns.

You can always note it in passing without a lot of hand waving and explanation; the whys are your business, and you get to choose when and how and if you share.

If you look at Twitter profiles for writers you'll see a lot of people just have a statement (they / them, he/his, etc.).

And this is absolutely a reasonable question and in the proper place.
 

DancingMaenid

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One of the awkward things about being non-binary or having a gender presentation that doesn't match what people expect, I think, is that the more open you are, the more noticeable it can be when people misgender you. For example, one time I was doing a talk about the importance of respecting people's pronouns. I had said in my introduction that I use they/them pronouns. My co-facilitator kept calling me "she." The most awkward thing about that, for me, was knowing that all these people watching knew that I was being misgendered and that I was now pressured to set a good example somehow. Unfortunately, it can be hard to openly non-binary without being forced to also become an activist.

I think one thing that can be good to keep in mind is that if you do rise to a level where you have an active career as an author (even if you're not "famous" per se), people will talk about you more and instances where they misgender you will possibly be noticed and garner a reaction. This doesn't have to be your problem. It also doesn't have to be a bad thing, exactly. It's better to have out trans and gender-nonconforming authors, and to occasionally see backlash when bloggers, interviewers, conference planners, or others in the industry mess up, than to never see any mistakes or misgendering because there is no diversity in the industry. But it's okay to consider how you would feel about being put in the spotlight like this, and whether you're comfortable with the possibility of being noticed.

But it's also true that being out can sometimes be much more of a non-issue than you expect. Depending on things like your genre and target audience, you being out might not cause any reaction, or might garner more of a positive reaction.
 

shadowsminder

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You are worrying about what somebody is thinking while they are sitting in their home? That's a bit far fetched. Whatever they are thinking about your pronouns, it's in their head and they are probably not even saying it aloud, and they may be miles away from you. But you worry? Why?

What anyone thinks in private is their own deal. I care about the actions that might be taken against me. Really crappy actions take me by surprise when I don't care, so I've learned to worry. People have a disturbing amount of power with an internet-connected computer, a few spare minutes, and an irrational hatred towards others who don't fit stereotypes.

I'm also fully aware that a few miles is meaningless. One of the most abusive people in my life is the type to drive across multiple states to show up with demands of how I act and present myself. I'll admit I'm paranoid. There's plenty of reasons why.

In this thread, however, my thought was that we could talk about the intersection of personal identity and author marketing.
 

Curlz

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I think one thing that can be good to keep in mind is that if you do rise to a level where you have an active career as an author (even if you're not "famous" per se), people will talk about you more and instances where they misgender you will possibly be noticed and garner a reaction.
Is there an example where this happened? I know trans authors and I haven't seen any problems happening in public.
 

shadowsminder

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Is there an example where this happened? I know trans authors and I haven't seen any problems happening in public.

One of the recent examples is misgendering of Bogi Takács leading up to Worldcon. The convention committee was publicly called out for using "he" instead of "e" in a bio.
 

shadowsminder

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DancingMaenid provided a good description of what it feels like to be misgendered at public events.

I'm a no-name trans author. I've watched an editor use the wrong name for me in a public announcement. The editor made no correction when I mentioned it. That was terrifying at the time, because I was trying to hide from dangerous people in my personal life. The risk appears to be less now, but no, I'm not out everywhere. I also don't have the resources to deal with new threats.

On the other hand... writing bios are challenging enough without worrying about a pronoun slipping in. Leaving everyone to make assumptions about my pronouns can be amusing but is also irritating. I envy those who never have to waste time thinking about these issues.
 

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Is there an example where this happened? I know trans authors and I haven't seen any problems happening in public.

Curlz, people are sharing their own lived experience right here in the thread. If you're going to continue to participate in the conversation, I highly recommend actually reading and contemplating much more carefully before throwing out insulting and toxic requests like this.

And if you don't understand why and how your question IS toxic, I recommend just reading and reflecting, and talking lots less on threads like this.
 

BenPanced

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Is there an example where this happened? I know trans authors and I haven't seen any problems happening in public.

One of the recent examples is misgendering of Bogi Takács leading up to Worldcon. The convention committee was publicly called out for using "he" instead of "e" in a bio.

Here's a short article. (And normally I say "don't read the comments" but in this case? Read the comments.)
 
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DancingMaenid

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One of the recent examples is misgendering of Bogi Takács leading up to Worldcon. The convention committee was publicly called out for using "he" instead of "e" in a bio.

Yeah, that was the specific situation I was thinking of. I think it's good that our society has reached a point where there are more authors who are out and where failures like this create conversations that are not completely hostile toward the author, but it's still a lot of pressure that authors don't automatically choose to sign up for simply because they aren't cis. Non-binary people are also a "novelty," and there are people who have a trans 101 level of understanding about how to treat binary trans people who pass but who struggle with people who are non-binary or who don't fit expected gender norms.

I think it's understandable to be worried about worse scenarios, too. There are people online who specifically go out of their way to mock or criticize trans/non-binary people, and sometimes it's directed at the people themselves. I don't feel like my chances of being targeted by a harassment campaign are too high, but that's a worst case scenario that's possible.