I've got a question about vocab

Pisco Sour

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 7, 2013
Messages
902
Reaction score
87
Location
Mad woman in the attic
I'm reading a hard-boiled crime novel whereby the author refers to the male MC's penis as a 'dangler'. The book is in British English, and though I get the reference I've never read this term in erotic romance, for example, or anywhere else. Wondering if I wrote that instead of the other more common words for male genitalia if readers would laugh their heads off?

Same for the word he's used to describe the vagina: yoni. Never come across this word before--anywhere, actually--and certainly never in erotica/erotic romance. Granted, as I said above this book is hard core crime and the author is male. But do people use 'yoni' in real life? And how do you pronounce that: Yoh-nee, yaw-nee...something else? Sorry, non-native English speaker here and I'm...baffled. And amused. But maybe I could be using these words in my erotic romances and erotica pieces?

Please shed some light! Thx!
 
Last edited:

Maryn

Sees All
Staff member
Super Moderator
Moderator
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2005
Messages
55,448
Reaction score
25,475
Location
Snow Cave
If I were reading erotic fiction, I'd gently close the book on yoni and put it in the donate pile. Dangler would make me laugh loudly before doing the same.

In erotica, including erotic romance, there's no reason to dodge the common everyday words people use for their various bits. (I'm mindful that this is a public board and won't use those words here. Hi, thirteen year olds!)

But in hard-boiled crime, clearly the author or publisher thinks this is the right thing to do. I'd have chosen other euphemisms, but then, I'm not British. I am mindful of a popular mystery series in the US, and checking out one I hadn't read in hardcover from the local library. Someone had taken a black felt-tip marker and covered all the words to which she (and you just know it was a she!) objected, from the few hard, salty ones to hell and damn--and even blasted. As if that weren't bad enough, the ink bled through the page to the other side. The book was unreadable, and I returned it and showed it to the librarian. She scowled, muttering something about charging someone for replacement. My impression was that she knew exactly who had defaced their book and that it had happened before.

Maryn, who never messes up library books
 

JakeSTamer

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 3, 2018
Messages
579
Reaction score
16
Location
Idaho
I've read erotica for years, and although I'm new to writing it I've never come across the word yoni. I had to look it up, like I said I'm new at writing, for myself I would be hesitant to use a word that I would think would make the reader stop reading to go look up what it means. I did find out the word comes from an ancient language in India, so maybe it's a normal word over there.
 

Pterofan

Trust me, I'm a writer
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Sep 23, 2009
Messages
2,132
Reaction score
1,271
Location
Pennsylvania Dutch Country
Website
www.pterosnest.blogspot.com
I've heard the word yoni (or maybe one that sounds the same but is spelled differently) before, but definitely not in an erotic or sexual context. I live in Lancaster County, PA, where we have a large Amish/Mennonite population. "Yoni," as I've heard it used, is a derogatory term for a Mennonite. I don't know how that relates to a woman's privates, and I'd much rather not think about it.
 

Lawless

Registered
Joined
May 1, 2018
Messages
29
Reaction score
4
The word "yoni" comes from India. In tantric massage courses, female genitals are routinely referred to as "yoni", apparently because it sounds nicer than the words we use in our everyday language.
 

Maryn

Sees All
Staff member
Super Moderator
Moderator
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2005
Messages
55,448
Reaction score
25,475
Location
Snow Cave
I'm sure I speak for all when I say, Glad to help!
 

Old Hack

Such a nasty woman
Super Moderator
Absolute Sage
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jun 12, 2005
Messages
22,454
Reaction score
4,956
Location
In chaos
I'm from the UK and while I've heard of both terms, I can't say that either is in common use here. "Dangler" would make me hoot with laughter. It's not erotic at all.
 

Pisco Sour

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 7, 2013
Messages
902
Reaction score
87
Location
Mad woman in the attic
I had a lot of past entanglements with the New Age crowd, and I would NEVER use the word yoni, unless I were running a fraudulent health supplement MLM, wearing a shirt with a cow that says "not your mom, not your milk," and teaching private yoga classes in which my students had to be penetrated to properly awaken the kundalini.



There is an icky new agey subtext with this word and I wouldn't use it colloquially in place of pussy in erotica, unless you're crafting a very specific type of vibe. It smacks of armchair psychics.

I used to manage a live foods bar. I've catered events for "gurus" who hosted all of their health retreats off US soil because too many people died on them, or were later busted in a multi million dollar scandal because their "purity in a bottle" turned out to be battery acid.

WHEW JADED

But I swear this is the only subculture in which I've heard the word "yoni" used, and regularly, along with a bunch of other ill-pronounced Sanskrit words to win the enlightenment pissing contest.

Lol, I'll keep ranting if anyone is entertained.

I think this post triggered me. Words are powerful things and pack a lot of context. Excuse me while I log out and taint my astral body with a steak.

LOL, Taint away. After reading the above I'm not surprised you feel the need. :)
 

dangerousbill

Retired Illuminatus
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Sep 22, 2010
Messages
4,810
Reaction score
413
Location
The sovereign state of Baja Arizona
Yoni is a Sanscrit word which roughly equates to pussy, but it has more of a spiritual tint to it than most of the 200+ words that are used to describe female bits, probably because of its connection to tantra. The male equivalent is lingam. Enormous lingam statues can be seen in street processions in some parts of India. But I've yet to see lingam used in erotic writing.

It's a good idea to get acquainted with urbandictionary.com , where numberless slang terms for sexual, scatological, and other terms are stored. I haven't looked to see if "dangler" is there, but it's a lot less stomach turning than many other terms for the dick. How about meatpole, or battering ram?
 

Trevor Bruhn

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 26, 2012
Messages
397
Reaction score
54
Location
Wetside. Wash
I recall, multiple decades ago, reading a Kama Sutra trans to English (paperback new for $1.95, that's how far back) where both terms D.B. has cited were used.
 

Maryn

Sees All
Staff member
Super Moderator
Moderator
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2005
Messages
55,448
Reaction score
25,475
Location
Snow Cave
What, you've never before visited urban dictionary? Of course, a lot of the sex terms in there are for things nobody actually does, especially the ones including body waste...
 

Pisco Sour

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 7, 2013
Messages
902
Reaction score
87
Location
Mad woman in the attic
What, you've never before visited urban dictionary? Of course, a lot of the sex terms in there are for things nobody actually does, especially the ones including body waste...

Nope, I hadn't (though I have a paperback 'urban dictionary' that's nothing like the vocab on that site).

And...eeeeeeuuuuuw (re body waste sex!)
 

louisecooksey

Audiobook Narrator
Registered
Joined
May 8, 2018
Messages
12
Reaction score
1
Website
louisecooksey.com
I giggle, have to cut it, giggle again, and cut it again, when an author doesn't use something that "flows" whether it's penis, cock, vag, or pussy ;) when I read a book.
 

katfireblade

Fluffy lurker in shadows
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 14, 2008
Messages
53
Reaction score
23
Location
All wet. Who ordered the rain?
In defense of "yoni," I remember that word being everywhere in the 90s and the really early 2000s. It even had a little mainstream usage in my area. Since we were always on the tail end of fads, I had the impression this was much bigger than just my area.

A lot of women preferred it because it carried none of the connotations of the English words. "Vagina" sounds clinical, and many people still can't bring themselves to say it because of the taboo against it, and every other word for a female's anatomy is either demeaning, hysterical (honeypot? Really?) or both. Even the ubiquitous "pussy" is often as not used in a derogatory fashion.

The 90s had like a mini-women's...thing. It had neither the momentum or direction to be called a "movement," but for a brief time there was a plethora of female singers and with it (cause or result I can't say) a spike of interest in female-centric topics. One was sex, as it always is, and a sort of "reclaiming" of the female body from negative labels. "Yoni" was a word many people latched on to. Usage faded out over time until only the new age crowd held on to it.

Keep in mind, I was in college at the time, so I'm recalling this through the eyes of the young rabble-rousers, but I do know the word was used by way more people than just the granola-eaters. I always liked the word; women have precious few positive labels, and to have one that carries only positive baggage is positively unheard of. It's nice to have a term that doesn't imply (through the term itself or the cultural baggage it carries) one's bits are dirty, sleazy, shameful, or only there for the amusement of others, even if it's only used in one's own head.
 

Pencrafter

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jun 2, 2019
Messages
86
Reaction score
3
swinging steak...wedding tackle...

in the right context, they could be either funny or just the right words.

The only sex-part word I truly detest, personally, rhymes with kitties. It is juvenile to my ear.
 
Last edited:

Maryn

Sees All
Staff member
Super Moderator
Moderator
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2005
Messages
55,448
Reaction score
25,475
Location
Snow Cave
For me, it's that one plus "boobies." Sheesh, are we twelve?
 

Lone Wolf

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 15, 2018
Messages
209
Reaction score
14
Location
Australia
Dangler would perhaps make me laugh, depends on context of course. More appropriate in a non sexual scene - like he gets out his dangler to pee - and if that wording seems to fit that character.

I thought everyone knew what yoni meant - but perhaps I'm showing my age if like Katfireblade says it died out in use after the 90's.
Perhaps one of the best words to use in polite society without being clinical.

I didn't want my toddlers calling out the clinical names of genitals in the supermarket, so I named my son's thing a kori - this is from the Romani language meaning the same thing. I was going tell my daughter hers was a yoni, but my toddler son got there first (linguistically) and dubbed it a kori same as his own!