So, what do vampires pee?

efreysson

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It depends entirely on how realistic you want your vampires to be and how YOU think their bodies should work. Do they follow normal rules of biology? Is there some kind of magic involved? Are they actually dead? Or are they something in between alive and dead as we know the terms?

Why do they drink blood? What is it in the blood that they need? How does it keep them alive? Figure out what it is they're collecting, and then figure out what the waste is.

Hmm. The idea is that vampires all descend from a single individual, who was cursed to feed off the life of others. Now that I think about it I see the curse as an old-fashioned, symbolic thing, and there is no matter of any actual nutrition. So maybe they would just excrete slightly rancid blood.
 

kwanzaabot

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Kidneys filter out the waste products that collect in the blood, and expel it as urine.

So... they'd just pee normally.
 

neandermagnon

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Blood is edible to humans. You don't need to adjust a vampire's physiology much to accommodate a diet of blood. If you eat/drink blood your digestive enzymes will break it all down and the useful bits (protein, iron etc) will be absorbed, and the rest will become faeces. The water part of the blood would be absorbed the same way as water in anything else you drink. Your kidneys will remove waste products and excess water from your blood. Your urine would still be urine.

Excessive consumption of blood may lead to iron toxicity. On the other hand, if you have iron deficiency anaemia, you'll get better. Consuming raw blood may put you at risk of illness, as would raw meat. Presumably the vampire's immune system would have adaptations to deal with this. Humans have been cooking food for about a million years now and have adapted somewhat to eating cooked food. Vampires may require some adaptation to deal with the constant high levels of iron without it getting to toxic levels. More of an issue would be the lack of plant foods in their diet, assuming that they're humans/descended from humans and not something that's evolved on an entirely separate branch of the tree of life. But I don't think you'd need to go into that in a story unless you want to write a health-conscious vampire that makes sure they get their five-a-day fruit and veg. I mean, technically they're undead so the lack of fibre and vitamin C probably isn't that much of an issue.

In any case, their pee would still be pee and look like human pee. Unless you want it to look different - maybe the vampire's body is flushing out the excess iron so it looks rusty or something?
 

Jason

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This thread should be published as a short reference:

Do Vampires Pee?

LOL
 

Roxxsmom

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Blood is mostly water, so they'd pee dilute urine.

Here's some info about vampire bats:



From TetZoo

Another biology person beat me to it. Vampire bats spend a lot of their time peeing, so if vampiric humans/humanoids subsisted on a diet that was 100% blood, they'd pee prodigious amounts of very dilute urine--enough to put an uncontrolled diabetic to shame.
 

Nekko

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I love this thread! Makes me regret having been off AW for so long...anyway, most of the others have given you good answers, both fictional and based on biology. They'd probably have normal looking urine (smell is up to you) and the non-liquid waste (like the cell walls or whatever) would be pooped out.

Excess iron in the system makes poop dark, tar-like--messier to wipe. This is base on having to take mega-mega doses of iron supplements when I was prego. Dr. just couldn't get his mind around that I was still anemic even on the normal super doses of iron in prego vitamins. ugh. TMI...maybe.
 

Beginning Write

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This thought process would be fun to take to its extreme....say if they pee blood then they would also sweat, cry, spit, etc. blood, making them both extremely creepy but also very unique (also a very obvious sign they were around...blood is everywhere in droplets, sweat stains, etc.) I would personally find that very different and intriguing :)