Yep. Looking at you, Poldark remake. **** SPOILER ALERT IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE PBS SHOW****
Because my body just seems physically incapable of sleep these days, I have spent quality time in the wee hours catching up on series I missed, one being the remake of Poldark (yes, I remember the one from the 1970s but did not remember the plot) For those who haven't seen it, Captain poldark returns to England from the American colonies where he was fighting in the Revolutionary war, only to discover his father dead, his estate in total disarray and his beloved Elizabeth about to marry his creepy cousin.
Okay then. The story gallops along (lots and lots of galloping along gorgeous Cornish cliffs) Various hardships befall our hero (many, so many) but near the end of season 2, he breaks into the home of his former GF (now widowed, he is also, supposedly happily married to someone else) to "protest" her upcoming marriage to his arch rival. Then he grabs her and kisses her. She pushes him away and says NO. He grabs her again and again she pushes him away with a firm NO. "You wouldn't dare!" she says, to which he responds, "I would and so would you!" and throws her on the bed and climbs on top. Cue the sounds of two very happy people enjoying an intimate moment.
Wait--what? This is our hero? The guy who rescues the downtrodden, who tirelessly stands up for the working people, who makes speeches about how his honor is all he has and so on. And yet. Not to mention, in the first season, one of his workers marries a young woman who has an affair with the local doctor. Her husband winds up killing her, but is saved and protected by Captain Poldark.
I have to say, I was kind of dumbfounded. Yes, it 's based on books written in the 1940s and 1950s. I get that. But the more disturbing thing was the comments one reads - not really rape because in a minute or two, she started enjoying it!!! Not rape because she (really, down deep) wanted him too! And these comments are NOT from the 1950s! I find it very disturbing to see the whole rape thing played out like this is a neat woman's fantasy, but, my younger acquaintences tell me I am too old to understand (okay, fair enough). They tell me that he totally apologizes (to his wife) and that the issue is that this was a fantasy, and his wife is "real" and NOW he really, really, really gets that the real one is better!! Some things you just have to try before you realize they won't work.
Right, so this is 2018. People are trying to have discussions, some very uncomfortable about dating and sex schemas. Things we always took as the norm are perhaps(one hopes) evolving into something better (again one hopes!) But it sure gets a lot harder with this in the background, with people watching this and having every "see? Women like to be overpowered and taken against their will" fantasy validated.
And the thing is, our hero is other wise likable. If the villain did this, I don't doubt people would say he raped her. But not our hero. Because it's him, the explanations abound--he'd just lost his daughter! Their love had never had a resolution! Their attraction was too powerful to resist! He said (to his wife, not the GF) that he was sorry and he doesn't do it again! Just as #Metoo gets blamed for "going to far" when it turns out a "nice" guy behaved badly. Oh, no! Not HIM!!
The show otherwise is great and the actors are terrific. No argument there. But romanticizing this behavior, I think, it seriously problematic.
Or, maybe I am just too old to get it!
Because my body just seems physically incapable of sleep these days, I have spent quality time in the wee hours catching up on series I missed, one being the remake of Poldark (yes, I remember the one from the 1970s but did not remember the plot) For those who haven't seen it, Captain poldark returns to England from the American colonies where he was fighting in the Revolutionary war, only to discover his father dead, his estate in total disarray and his beloved Elizabeth about to marry his creepy cousin.
Okay then. The story gallops along (lots and lots of galloping along gorgeous Cornish cliffs) Various hardships befall our hero (many, so many) but near the end of season 2, he breaks into the home of his former GF (now widowed, he is also, supposedly happily married to someone else) to "protest" her upcoming marriage to his arch rival. Then he grabs her and kisses her. She pushes him away and says NO. He grabs her again and again she pushes him away with a firm NO. "You wouldn't dare!" she says, to which he responds, "I would and so would you!" and throws her on the bed and climbs on top. Cue the sounds of two very happy people enjoying an intimate moment.
Wait--what? This is our hero? The guy who rescues the downtrodden, who tirelessly stands up for the working people, who makes speeches about how his honor is all he has and so on. And yet. Not to mention, in the first season, one of his workers marries a young woman who has an affair with the local doctor. Her husband winds up killing her, but is saved and protected by Captain Poldark.
I have to say, I was kind of dumbfounded. Yes, it 's based on books written in the 1940s and 1950s. I get that. But the more disturbing thing was the comments one reads - not really rape because in a minute or two, she started enjoying it!!! Not rape because she (really, down deep) wanted him too! And these comments are NOT from the 1950s! I find it very disturbing to see the whole rape thing played out like this is a neat woman's fantasy, but, my younger acquaintences tell me I am too old to understand (okay, fair enough). They tell me that he totally apologizes (to his wife) and that the issue is that this was a fantasy, and his wife is "real" and NOW he really, really, really gets that the real one is better!! Some things you just have to try before you realize they won't work.
Right, so this is 2018. People are trying to have discussions, some very uncomfortable about dating and sex schemas. Things we always took as the norm are perhaps(one hopes) evolving into something better (again one hopes!) But it sure gets a lot harder with this in the background, with people watching this and having every "see? Women like to be overpowered and taken against their will" fantasy validated.
And the thing is, our hero is other wise likable. If the villain did this, I don't doubt people would say he raped her. But not our hero. Because it's him, the explanations abound--he'd just lost his daughter! Their love had never had a resolution! Their attraction was too powerful to resist! He said (to his wife, not the GF) that he was sorry and he doesn't do it again! Just as #Metoo gets blamed for "going to far" when it turns out a "nice" guy behaved badly. Oh, no! Not HIM!!
The show otherwise is great and the actors are terrific. No argument there. But romanticizing this behavior, I think, it seriously problematic.
Or, maybe I am just too old to get it!