Worried that publishers won't believe my crazy memoir

RainyWoods said:

Hello, I need advice on writing my experiences of living in a small town for three years where I was sexually assaulted twice (by two different people), was kidnapped by a crazy ex, wasn't believed by small town crooked cops nor by my church since I had a history of being promiscuous, got into drugs and how I found my way to sobriety, spirituality, and true inner healing. I need advice on how to write this book without getting sued.

Click to expand...

You can't control other people, so even if you write a really positive account and only say nice things, there's no guarantee you won't get sued.

If you want advice on how to protect yourself legally, you need to pay a good solicitor for their time. We can't help you.

I'll change names but can I use the name of this small town?

Click to expand...

Changing names won't protect you. Using a pseudonym won't protect you.

I also worry that no publisher will believe that I was assaulted twice and kidnapped by my ex. I think this comes from the cops not believing me. How can I handle these fears? Do you think publishers would believe my story?

Click to expand...

Publishers will believe you if you write the book well enough. If your writing isn't good enough, they won't believe you--and they won't publish your book. All you can do is write as honest an account as you can, write it as well as you can, and hope for the best.

I can see the conflict between your account and the police not believing you could make a very interesting book, if it's written very well. But you are at risk of libelling the police officers who didn't see truth in your story, so you must take legal advice before trying to get this published. A publisher will take legal steps to protect themselves: but they won't protect you, so you have do make sure you know what the realities are before going ahead.

I'm writing this to help other victims and addicts find healing and sobriety like I did.
Any help is much appreiacted.
Thank you.

Click to expand...

This is a big problem.

Publishers don't publish books to help other victims: they publish books to make money. If you suggest that other victims are the market for this book, you're telling them that the market is limited.

Sat Nam! (literally "Truth Name"--a Sikh greeting)

I won't address the legal issues here. But I can address the will-they-believe-it one. Life is much crazier than fiction. What won't work in fiction can and does work in memoir. So be at peace about that issue. You may not get the police who didn't believe you in the first place to believe you now. But they're not the people you're writing for. Right?

Blessings,

Siri Kirpal

My understanding is that you'll probably need to provide some documentation to corroborate your story if you get to the point of publication. Ever since the James Frey debacle, I think publishers of memoir are more careful to verify the facts.

Hi
Sadly , sexual abuse and discrimination is a common event for women everywhere , every day . However , if your story is unproven ,it remains an accusation . It would be unwise for anybody to publish it. You could change things a bit , and make it a work of fiction .

RainyWoods said:

Hello, I need advice on writing my experiences of living in a small town for three years where I was sexually assaulted twice (by two different people), was kidnapped by a crazy ex, wasn't believed by small town crooked cops nor by my church since I had a history of being promiscuous, got into drugs and how I found my way to sobriety, spirituality, and true inner healing. I need advice on how to write this book without getting sued. I'll change names but can I use the name of this small town? I also worry that no publisher will believe that I was assaulted twice and kidnapped by my ex. I think this comes from the cops not believing me. How can I handle these fears? Do you think publishers would believe my story? I'm writing this to help other victims and addicts find healing and sobriety like I did.
Any help is much appreiacted.
Thank you.

Click to expand...

Umm, I think I had a crazier life and I'm sure I'm not alone, but who cares? I don't. Write a compelling story, meaning write your story well and it'll be a valuable contribution to the literary world.

I've never known publishers ask for proof that someone was sexually assaulted.

Most fabricated memoirs are easy to spot because there's not enough balance in them, and the details don't add up. Few people are good enough writers to write a memoir convincingly if it didn't happen.

We might well need more memoirs discussing rape and assault, but publishers won't be interested in it unless there's a market for it as well. That's going to be your problem. Right now there are hundreds of memoirs of sexual assault coming in to publishers and while they are all harrowing stories, very few are going to be published because they're just not commercial enough, I'm afraid.

Write your memoir. Make it as good as you can and of course, be honest and true all the way through. But also consider what your market might be: who might buy it, why they might buy it. Consider what separates your story from everyone else's, and focus on that. It could be a matter of structure, or it might be that your story is more extreme than most, or it might be some level of notoriety which is attached to your tale.

It's not like you're saying you were kidnapped by Bigfoot and Elvis. Sexual assault is unfortunately common. So are abusive ex's. I don't see anything that would on the surface sound unbelievable. Of course, it depends on how you write it, but if it's the truth, as they say, "tell the truth and shame the Devil."

Yeah, nothing in that story sounds particularly farfetched to me. I wouldn't find it hard to believe, if I were reading it as a memoir.

I know nothing about the legal issues surrounding stuff like that though. I don't write memoirs, or nonfiction in general. You'd probably have to consult with a lawyer, or possibly another memoir-writer who's written something similar.

A trade publisher should deal with all the legal issues for memoir writers--but their lawyer will consider the publisher's legal worries, not the writer's. They're often the same, but aren't always. And remember: it doesn't matter how legally safe you are, people can still start legal proceedings against you. Being in the right doesn't protect you from that.