Story Idea

Status
Not open for further replies.

musclemom

Banned
Joined
Jun 17, 2017
Messages
11
Reaction score
1
Location
IL
Not sure if this is in the right place, but I'd like to hear any brainstorming ideas you may have....

One story I'm working on is about a husband and wife, she is physically much stronger than he is from working out.

The humor/comedy comes in during their adventures she will have the chance to use her strength/show off in ways that make him look weak.

Examples?
 

Maryn

Sees All
Staff member
Super Moderator
Moderator
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2005
Messages
55,447
Reaction score
25,467
Location
Snow Cave
In general, I am not stronger than Mr. Maryn, but my thick legs are. We once rented one of those Swan Boats in Boston and he simply could not pedal any more after a while. In order to get back before they charged us for another hour, I pedaled the two of us. No sweat. Literally. It wasn't even hard and I was somewhat mystified that he could not go on.

In a related incident many years ago, before my knees became crap, I used to work the weight machines at a gym. As usual, upper body needed lots of work and saw very slow improvement, but lower body got real strong. So one day I've finished the leg press and wiped it down like a good gym member and am just standing there waiting for the next machine in the circuit to be free.

This body builder, totally ripped, and shirtless despite gym policies requiring a shirt, sits down at the leg press without even changing the settings or checking the weight it's set to. He puts his feet in position, presses, and the plate stack lifts about three inches before he drops it with a loud clang that makes everybody in the room look at him.

"Who's playing tricks, setting this thing so high even I can't lift it?" Most of the people--it's largely men, by coincidence only--shrug and don't reply, but a few who know I was the one kind of smirk. He literally grabs the front of the closest smirker's T-shirt demanding he confess, so even though I'd finished with the machine, I got back on and did another set, really watching my form. Fifteen reps, no problem at all, since I'd had a little rest. It's probably time to add another plate.

Mr. Body Builder stormed out red-faced. It was the highlight of my time being a gym member.
 

Maryn

Sees All
Staff member
Super Moderator
Moderator
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Feb 12, 2005
Messages
55,447
Reaction score
25,467
Location
Snow Cave
Oh, I kind of forgot something I was going to say. You need to be careful about the root of the humor being in humiliating the male, which is not especially funny to most people, when it's better grounded in the two people having different kinds of strengths. She may be physically stronger by a large margin, but she could also freak out at large spiders, since being strong has nothing to do with the visceral reaction many people have to such creatures.
 

threetoedsloth

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 23, 2014
Messages
143
Reaction score
6
Location
California
You may be able to get a few good laughs out of that, but it'll need a lot more to keep the story going. When the source of the humor is a comic drop (reduction in status) or humiliation, you have to be careful or it'll stop being funny and start being mean spirited.
 
Last edited:

Fruitbat

.
Kind Benefactor
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 15, 2010
Messages
11,833
Reaction score
1,310
I could see this being funnier if it was told from the man's point of view. It would make me chuckle to read him having grumpy, self-deprecating thoughts about it.

But if it was from her point of view, yeah, I could see it easily crossing over into sounding mean-spirited.

Another way would be to just write it with no conscious attempt at being funny, and just let it be a background fact in the larger story. By that I mean I think it could also easily be pushed too hard and lose its humor.

Then again, if we saw a real version of what you had in mind, maybe it would work. It's hard to judge what's funny without reading the actual story.
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.