Most of these are just awful. That must be why I'm enjoying this thread so much.
There was a time when I kept the best jokes people shared on Prodigy (I'm that old!), but I stopped when the internet replaced it. Anyway, I have this one joke about Easter. Whether you are blond or celebrate the holiday, no offense is intended.
Three blondes died in a car crash. At the Pearly Gates of Heaven, Saint Peter tells them that they can enter if they can answer one simple question. He asks the first blonde, "What is Easter?"
The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy! It's the holiday in November when everybody gets together, eats turkey, and are thankful..."
"Wrong! You must go to Hell!" replies Saint Peter, and proceeds to ask the second blonde the same question.
She replies, "Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus."
Saint Peter bangs his head on the Pearly Gates, tells the second blonde she's wrong and to go to Hell, and then peers over his glasses at the third blonde. "What is Easter?"
The third blonde smiles confidently and looks Saint Peter in the eyes. "I know what Easter is."
"Oh?" says Saint Peter incredulously. "What?"
"Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and Jesus was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by one of his disciples. The Romans took him to be crucified and he was stabbed in the side, made to wear a crown of thorns, and hung on a cross with nails through his hands. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder."
Saint Peter smiles broadly with delight.
The third blonde continues, "And every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out. If he sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter."