Haggis and Reg's Robot and Chihuahua Poetry Slam

regdog

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The Cabaret has been closed since quite frankly the comedy was sorely lacking. Instead we will now have Haggis and Reg's Robot and Chihuahua Poetry Slam where you may extol the virtues of the ever noble chihuahua and robots in poetic form, stanza, haiku and limerick are preferred but narrative and epic are also welcome.
 

regdog

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Excellent beginning to our new thread
 

Haggis

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Yip, yip, yip, yip, yip
Yip, yip, yip, yip, yip, yip, yip
Yip, yip, yip, yip, yip

:thankyou:
 

Alessandra Kelley

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To a Chihuahua


Hail to thee, wee doggie!
Mutt thou never wert,
Though thine eyes be soggy,
And ears both large and pert,
A masterpiece of subtle canine breeding art.


Thy high persistent yapping
Drifts from out in the night,
Preventing me from napping
And giving cats a fright.
Thou art unseen, but yet I hear thy shrill delight.
 

Silent Rob

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There once was a chihuey from japan
Whose limericks just did not scan
When he was asked why,
He said, "Yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yap".
 

Haggis

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I left you a gift
Well, not exactly a gift
On your bedroom rug
 

regdog

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Are you Autobot
Or are you Decepticon
Answer wisely mech
 

alleycat

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The Chihuey

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of modern gore—
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a yelping,
As of some one gently pawing, pawing at my chamber door.
“’Tis some visitor,” I muttered, “yelping at my chamber door—

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before;
But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, “More”
This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, “More”—
Merely this and nothing more.

Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a strut and swagger,
In there stepped a stately little dog of the saintly days of yore;
Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he;
But, with mien of lord or lady, entered through my chamber door—
Squatting under a bust of Pallas just above my chamber door—
That fat thing just sat there, and nothing more.

Then this little chihuahua beguiled my sad fancy into smiling,
By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore,
“Though thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou,” I said, “art sure no hound,
Ghastly grim and ancient wolf wandering from the Nightly shore—
Tell me what thy desire is on the Night’s Plutonian shore!”
Quoth the doggie, “I want more.”

So I gave the demanding little dog some Lil' Smokies,
That for just such uninvited guests I kept in store.
I gave him one, then another, then yet another still,
But he kept wanting more, until finally he could eat no more,
Then he laid down upon the hearthrug and began to snore.
I know one thing, I ain't letting that damn dog in no more.
 
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regdog

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:Clap::Clap::Clap: thread win for the kee kat
 

tiddlywinks

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*steps up to mic*
*taps politely*

I once stuck a fork in a toaster
When she messed with my sparkly avie
I even thought about making a poster
Prohibiting decepticons in the cabbie
Because

But then I remembered it could be worse
Like pink and fluffy and cutesie
Still, I decided to twerk with bad verse
And brave being turned into "poopsie"
Because

*twerks off stage*