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Thread: Suggestions About Being Safe In Social Spaces

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  1. #1
    'Twas but a dream of thee El Jefe MacAllister's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Out on a limb

    Suggestions About Being Safe In Social Spaces

    Here's the thing, younger folk:

    I'm an old lady. I've been a Dyke my whole life. I've been OUT for 30-odd years, and that goes back to a time when it really wasn't safe to be out. You could get fired from your job, evicted from your apartment, or beat up on the street, and no one was going to object and the cops were probably part of the problem.

    Starting right now, don't go out without a buddy or three (or ten) and make a pact that NO ONE LEAVES ALONE when you do go out.

    Watch your drinks.

    Know who is watching you.

    The places you're at most risk are the parking lots/streets immediately outside known queer/trans-friendly places. That might be bars, clubs, community-centers, bookstores, coffee-shops, etc. -- don't get caught on the street or in a parking lot or alley by yourself. Ironically, you're also at great risk on your own front steps.

    Know your neighbors. Install security cams, if it's economically feasible.

    This takes some planning and some care. But you can learn the skills.

    Diana, I'm sure, has similar tips too. She's been doing this for a while, and lived through much tougher times, too. You can do this. And we have your backs. We'll help. We'll coach. Make connections with other queer folk in your communities.

    You can do this. You have a wealth of history and information available to you that we didn't have, when I was 20-something. The real difference is that, when I was young, the older queer folk had vanished. They aged out of the club/college/activism scenes, and we didn't know who they were. And we didn't have the 'Net.

    You guys HAVE a visible generation of folks who've lived through Matthew Shepherd and AIDS and Stonewall. We honestly never dreamed we'd see same-sex marriage in our lifetimes -- so if it gets ripped away again, well...joke 'em if they can't take a fuck. We loved before they decided we could have pieces of paper saying it was legal, and we'll go on loving if they change their minds.

    They can't touch who you are. They can't touch who WE are. They never could, and it doesn't matter how mad that makes some people, they never WILL.

    We'll help.
    Last edited by MacAllister; 11-11-2016 at 09:31 AM.

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