On Outting and Why We Don't Do It

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v. out·ed, out·ing, outs
v.intr.
2
a.
To expose (someone considered to be heterosexual) as being gay, lesbian, or bisexual.​

Yes, even though LGBT folk are protected against discrimination in some states (a handful), and same-sex marriages are legal in all 50 states, it's still not OK to out someone. That means, it's not OK to refer to someone even in trusted situations as gay, lesbian, queer, bisexual, or trans unless you're 100% positive they're out everywhere all the time.

This is true for a number of reasons, especially online.

  • They may be "out" online but not in real life.
  • They may be out socially but not at work — Consider that it's perfectly legal in many states and countries to fire someone because you think they're not straight.
  • They may be minors and living at home, or still depending on parents for college etc.


Unless you have specific permission, don't out anyone. It's not OK.

That "one person" or "trusted group of friends" may forget that the person isn't publicly out, or may not know, and say something to the wrong person or in the wrong place.

People have been known to commit suicide, be fired, or kicked out of a home because they've been outed.


Why Outing Can Be Deadly

Outting is Totally Still A Thing