Write Something About The Person Above You (Volume V)

^ Refused to take the red pill.

^ Skips to the loo without bowing to a partner.

^ Put flies in the buttermilk

^Tried to make buttermilk by pouring 2% onto margarine. Will try to make eggnog next by breaking eggs into nog

^Tried to bring together an ox and a moron - so that he might breed a whole tribe of them.

^Trains puppies to look cute because they aren't cute enough on their own

^ Aboard abroad; looking for love in all the wrong places (Johnny Lee).

^ Looking for songs in all the wrong places. Mibbit, his last song about a frog, exited through the pet door ... never to be seen again.

^ Found love. Lost it. It was all in his mind.

^Dragon breeder. Hole in pocket. Lost the egg.

^ Been there, did that, got the t-shirt (and returned it 'cos it wasn't cute enough) and trumpeted, "Veni, Vici, Vamoosi!" (Terry Pratchett.)

^Marches to the tune of a one armed drummer. Therefore hops around a lot.

^Takes your sins and converts them to fortune cookies.

^Was held captive in a fortune cookie factory. Rescued when someone read his note and called the fortune cookie police

^ Locked Nathan in the fortune cookie factory.

^Plagiarizes fortune cookies for story ideas

^ Found an epiphony eating the fortune of the fortune cookie. Apparently, it tasted more of a cookie than the actual edible part.

^Breeds epiponies. They're the dangerous microscopic bugs that eat away at your latest WIP.

*Haven't you ever re-opened your doc and wondered what happened to the 3000+ words you just typed? You know who to blame.*

^ Eats WIPs.

^A pioneer of the BadNews game, Snitch launched a campaign against an annoying critic, who was subsequently relegated to painting over bathroom graffiti.

^ No° 1 devoted fan!

^Serving 2-5 weeks for texting while walking.

^Serving hamburgers because he missed the text from Ed McMahon telling him he might be a winner

^ Deleted his own text from Ed McMahon, so is also serving and severing burgers.

^Is serving time for severing burgers, among other things