Hi guys,

So I've started a new project, sci-fi/fantasy, so not set on our world. It's based around four large isles, one in particular is a bit Zenophobic. So I have this character who meets my MC who happens to be from another island, different accent included.
So here I am trying to give him an accent and I can't help giving him a west indian (Caribbean) one. I'm trying to mix it up a little but just can't help it!

Not sure if I'll keep it this way but just testing it and how it sounds to me and to you guys. I don't like writing things phonetically so I've gone for how the character speaks rather than sounds. I'm not trying to make him sound authentic to any real west indian accent, as long as in reading, an accent comes through.

Take a look and tell me what you think?
Thanks!

**********************************************
MC comes around from being momentarily knocked out by an unknown person(s) and wakes to a conversation.

‘I say slap him one time *if* you want. You give him a concussion.’

‘We were told he was aggressive. Better safe than sor- and look, he’s fine.’

‘Beside the point! He can get much done seeing double?’

My trailer ceiling came into view.

‘Boy...’ Someone clicked their fingers. ‘You can hear me?’

I propped myself up and sat against my kitchen drawers.

‘Focus. Focus...’ More clicking of the fingers.

A shadow hovered by my face until the features of a man crouching beside me began to appear. He was dressed in black, wearing a turtle neck, which just looked uncomfortable, and his blueberry dyed hair made his complexion come across unnaturally white. He had a strong jaw, too - clean shaven - like those stupid men who pranced around in brief ads. And I couldn’t even begin to describe his accent; sharp C’s like K’s, missing words, calm but quick…never heard anything like it before.
************************************************** **