Writing about things you can't write about

I think this may be a uniquely Native American issue, but I'd love to be wrong, and I want to hear if other PoC writers face similar issues and how they handle it.

How do you write about things you can't write about? Are there aspects of your culture that are "taboo" to write about? Are there aspects of your culture that you feel you shouldn't write about? Are there aspects of your culture it would be disrespectful to write about? How do you reconcile these issues and feelings in your writing?

I was just thinking about the next couple of chapters in my work-in-progress, and realized I'd plotted a scene that I couldn't — in any kind of good faith — actually write. I'm writing a coming-of-age novel about a half-Zuni Indian like me, who grew up away from the reservation. When he's 12, I have him participating in an initiation ceremony that I can't actually write, because what happens is a part of our religion that's a secret. (The ceremony itself is a rite-of-passage that initiates you into those secrets.) I mean this to be an important moment for character development, but there's no way I can actually write the scene, or even summarize it.

What I'm left with is that I'll probably do a "fade-to-black" at some point, and write some sort of dream sequence that represents what happens metaphorically. (The novel is magic realism, so a purely metaphorical surrealistic sequence isn't very out-of-place — I have quite a few, actually.)

Do you ever encounter a difficulty like this when writing about PoC experiences? What I think is so uniquely weird about it is that it's impossible to be 100% faithful and true to the experience, without also being disrespectful to it. Usually we want to write PoC experiences realistically in order to be respectful, and here I find it impossible to do so. Just one more part of the struggle of being a PoC writer...

So how would you write about things you can't write about? Have you had to? How did you do it?

RichardGarfinkle said:

It's not quite a uniquely Native American issue, but that's not the part of the problem I'd like to address. There is a writing solution to your problem which applies regardless of the source of the taboo.
One question, does your story have a narrator? If it is being told to a presumptive non-Zuni audience then your narrator can express the same concerns you have and not speak about the ceremony because it's taboo.
Done properly this can strengthen the sense and importance of the ceremony.
You can also show the effects of the ceremony by changes in how the character thinks, acts, and is treated. Secret events can be shown by their consequences without ever showing them or talking about them directly.

Click to expand...

Thanks. I'm really less concerned about my own handling of it than I am interested in hearing about how other authors have faced similar issues.

Cyia said:

Would it be a different process than any other "Fade to Black" moment? There are subjects many writers don't feel comfortable sharing, either because of the nature of the incident or their own experiences. Sometimes, all you need is an appropriate lead-in with a suitably affected outcome. The reader can infer the important parts of what exists within the fade.

Click to expand...

It's really weird for me because I generally never do fade-to-black. There's pretty much no subject about which I'm uncomfortable writing.

Rather than an ordinary fade-to-black moment, it feels a lot to me like writing an erotica novel, and then leaving out the sex scenes.

Write your rite up to the furthest possible point that you're allowed to speak of, with a heavy focus on how the initiate feels and what he's gone through to get to that point, like he's walking toward a precipice about to look down before a jump. Then pick it up at the point you're allowed to share, again. He's now at the bottom of the precipice. No one needs to see the jump to know he's done something that's changed him, because he'll now react as someone who's faced that moment.

Click to expand...

Well part of the difficult I have with doing that is in some ways the outcome is meant to be kind of anti-climactic. Nothing really changes. And that's part of the point.

RichardGarfinkle said:

Sorry, that's what I more or less was doing. While I haven't dealt with personal taboos, I've had characters telling first person stories wherein they explain that they won't talk about certain ceremonies they've been through. My point was that the personal problem can be separated from the writing problem, the latter being solvable.

Click to expand...

The personal part is what I'm interested in. It makes me wonder whether it's even possible to write fiction that is 100% faithful to a certain experience when writing about certain parts of that experience is off-limits.

Cyia said:

Is the initiate aware of this before the rite? Is it possible that he's surprised by how much hasn't changed? If so, you could focus on that.

Click to expand...

He's basically doing it because it's expected of him. He's just going through the motions.

And no need to call him an initiate. He's just a confused boy.

RichardGarfinkle said:

Do you think the difficulties in writing about indescribable events and their consequences are comparable or is the taboo difficulty (rather than the can't talk about it difficulty) what you're trying to get at?

Click to expand...

I'm interested in particular about the cultural aspect and communicating across cultures.

In my example, this is something I'd be comfortable writing about personally, but I don't want to do it because I would be betraying my culture and disrespecting their traditions.

The difficulty arises because I'm both an outsider and an insider.

dolores haze said:

Have you read Lakota Woman by Mary Crow Dog? She went into some details about secretive ceremonies, even including photos. This pissed off quite a few people, or so I heard.

Click to expand...

Hadn't heard of it. I'd be pissed, too, and that's exactly what I don't want to do.

Regarding your particular challenge, possibly you could start the story right after the initiation ceremony, thereby being able to write about the aftermath without giving details of the ceremony itself.

Click to expand...

No, it's important that it occurs at this particular point in the plot. It's where it makes the most sense dramatically and thematically.

(But seriously, I didn't mean for this thread to be about helping me with my own writing dilemma.)