Old Fart's and Pouffes Bar, Grill, and Hogewey Infirmary
- Thread starter Haggis
- Start date
I'm pretty sure having an animal for a husband is against the law, even in Maine.
Reminds me of the redneck in this professor's class who when asked if he ever had sex with a ghost. He said yes. Prof asked him again - "With a ghost?" "Oh," he said. "Thought you said goat."
A nurse asked me if I smoked and I told her, only after I have sex with myself. She grimaced. Which worried me.
Later, whilst she held a syringe over the crook of my arm, she said, "Okay, a little prick."
I told her there was no need to get personal.
She grinned.
Encouraged, I began to lay another line on her and she stopped me. "Quit while you're batting five hundred."
Later, whilst she held a syringe over the crook of my arm, she said, "Okay, a little prick."
I told her there was no need to get personal.
She grinned.
Encouraged, I began to lay another line on her and she stopped me. "Quit while you're batting five hundred."
I'll have to try that next time. I'm forever getting blood drawn for one ailment or another.
Me, too. Between the VA clinic
my local doc
, and the rip-it-out-and-put-in-a-new-joint 
folks in Eugene, I'm thinking of asking 'em them to install a permanent stent. 
I wanted to wish everyone a happy Christmas and a fulfilling New Year. 2017 was a bad year for us, wife in the hospital three times (a-fib attack and stroke) and me once (bad reaction to new medicine) and Jack, my eldest brother (and WW11 vet), passed. At the first of the year his estate sent us $500, and I was inspired to save it - so far I've added $350 to it. Not much, true, but it encouraged me after a bad year to rescue our finances, which were in pretty bad state. Good things can happen, hope the best for everyone here.
Hope you have turned the corner ... turning any corner at our ages here is a major task .. you seem to have a decent grip on the steering wheel
This has been a better than average year for us, moving into my dream house when I had no idea it was an option a year ago, six healthy daschund puppies to supply a little joy, no new health problems, but I still have greasy hands on the wheel. I'm thankful fort all of that as well as the many of you still being around to share my aging. Maybe this next year I'll sell the book Chase edited (still managing to procastinate on that one) and put him to work editing another. Since the subject is the Chinese destroying the world banking system as part of a bigger plan, the timing might be right.
This has been a better than average year for us, moving into my dream house when I had no idea it was an option a year ago, six healthy daschund puppies to supply a little joy, no new health problems, but I still have greasy hands on the wheel. I'm thankful fort all of that as well as the many of you still being around to share my aging. Maybe this next year I'll sell the book Chase edited (still managing to procastinate on that one) and put him to work editing another. Since the subject is the Chinese destroying the world banking system as part of a bigger plan, the timing might be right.
Happy holidays to all of you. And absolutely the very best for the New Year. May it just be a year of health, wealth and happiness.
Okay, I was trying for something original there but it was taking too long. You know how it gets, right?
Okay, I was trying for something original there but it was taking too long. You know how it gets, right?
Well, I went from terminally ill to critically ill after an operation (that they actually botched). Imagine a Mayo Clinic surgeon/instructor screwing up an operation. Gak. Okay, what I want for Christmas is...to go from critically ill to seriously ill. Seriously. Then after New Years I want to go from seriously ill to just ill. That's the ticket. Then I want an handler who carries my oxygen tube around after me all day without kinking the damn thing. Now we got it!
So marry kiss-kiss and a happy nude year!
Belches....
So marry kiss-kiss and a happy nude year!
Belches....
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Hi, Gail. Get well soon, Triceretops. I'll pass on kissin' the moose.
However, merry Christmas and happy New Year to all of you old guys and gals.
However, merry Christmas and happy New Year to all of you old guys and gals.
I'm sorry for your serious health outcomes, Triceretops. I'm going under the knife on January 14 for a new knee. I hope for better luck than you've had.
Hang in there!
Thanks, buds. I'm sending radar luck to you, Chase. You're going to be just fine. Best of holidays to all of you old fogies.
I'm usually "If it weren't for bad luck I'd have no luck at all." Hope for competent doctors. Hang in there, guys. This is one of those mornings I want to yell "Beam me up, Scotty!"
Wow! I really hope your Christmas wishes come true, Tri. 
And I'll be thinking of you, too, Chase.
I'm scheduled to pop in to the local hospital on 8th January for keyhole gall bladder removal some time during the day. Piddling stuff compared to what you're coping with.
Hang in there, guys.
And I'll be thinking of you, too, Chase. I'm scheduled to pop in to the local hospital on 8th January for keyhole gall bladder removal some time during the day. Piddling stuff compared to what you're coping with.
Hang in there, guys.