Limericks Still Live!

oneblindmouse · May 14, 2020

I'm wearing a moth-eaten hat,
the one that I swiped from Jack Sprat.
It's lacking a crown
and the brim’s fallen down
and it smells like a rampant Tom cat.

But it fits on my head like a glove

Sir_Nigel · May 14, 2020

But it fits on my head like a glove
It's a hat sent from heaven above!

CDSinex · May 14, 2020

But it fits on my head like a glove
It's a hat sent from heaven above!
If it weren't for the fleas,

oneblindmouse · May 14, 2020

But it fits on my head like a glove
It's a hat sent from heaven above!
If it weren't for the fleas,
And the lice and the bees,

Nymtoc · May 14, 2020

But it fits on my head like a glove
It's a hat sent from heaven above!
If it weren't for the fleas,
And the lice and the bees,
It would be a chapeau I could love.

Being stuck here, I've stocked up on booze

CDSinex · May 14, 2020

Being stuck here, I've stocked up on booze,
thinking, "Hell, I've got nothing to lose"

oneblindmouse · May 15, 2020

Being stuck here, I've stocked up on booze,
thinking, "Hell, I've got nothing to lose.
The bars are all closed

Cobalt Jade · May 16, 2020

Being stuck here, I've stocked up on booze,
thinking, "Hell, I've got nothing to lose.
The bars are all closed
But a sensitive nose

Woollybear · May 16, 2020

Being stuck here, I've stocked up on booze,
thinking, "Hell, I've got nothing to lose.
The bars are all closed
But a sensitive nose
Unerringly leads me to booze.

I cheated because I am drunk.

Sir_Nigel · May 18, 2020

I cheated because I am drunk.
I admit, I’m a terrible monk

CDSinex · May 18, 2020

I cheated because I am drunk.
I admit, I’m a terrible monk.
I chant way too loud

Woollybear · May 18, 2020

I cheated because I am drunk.
I admit, I’m a terrible monk.
I chant way too loud
And draw quite a crowd

Marissa D · May 18, 2020

I cheated because I am drunk.
I admit, I’m a terrible monk.
I chant way too loud
And draw quite a crowd
for my tonsure is moussed a la punk.

It's too much: I simply can't cope

Nymtoc · May 18, 2020

It's too much: I simply can't cope.
I try and I try. It's no soap.

Sir_Nigel · May 19, 2020

It's too much: I simply can't cope.
I try and I try. It's no soap.
So I've turned to the booze

Cobalt Jade · May 19, 2020

It's too much: I simply can't cope.
I try and I try. It's no soap.
So I've turned to the booze
And by ones and by twos

oneblindmouse · May 19, 2020

It's too much: I simply can't cope.
I try and I try. It's no soap.
So I've turned to the booze
And by ones and by twos
I'll finally make it to Pope.

The answer, I'm told, is a four

CDSinex · May 19, 2020

(I googled it, and found that homophones are acceptable in Limericks. :Shrug:

)

The answer, I'm told, is a four,
or did that golfer just shout, "FORE"?

oneblindmouse · May 19, 2020

The answer, I'm told, is a four,
or did that golfer just shout, "FORE"?
We're out on the green

Sir_Nigel · May 21, 2020

The answer, I'm told, is a four,
or did that golfer just shout, "FORE"?
We're out on the green
at hole seventeen

CDSinex · May 23, 2020

The answer, I'm told, is a four,
or did that golfer just shout, "FORE"?
We're out on the green
at hole seventeen,
pelted with golf balls, and I'm sore.

He though he would go to the pond

Marissa D · May 23, 2020

He thought he would go to the pond
And so, with a wave of his wand,

CDSinex · May 24, 2020

He thought he would go to the pond
And so, with a wave of his wand,
in a blink he was there

Nymtoc · May 24, 2020

He thought he would go to the pond
And so, with a wave of his wand,
in a blink he was there,
and so was a bear

Sir_Nigel · May 28, 2020

He thought he would go to the pond
And so, with a wave of his wand,
in a blink he was there,
and so was a bear
with a beautiful tall Russian blonde.

Hallo, she announced, I’m Ludmilla

Limericks Still Live!

The new me

aka Dylan di Vilde

Imagine something clever here.

The new me

Benefactor Member

Imagine something clever here.

The new me

aka Dylan di Vilde

Imagine something clever here.

Scribe of the girls in the basement

Benefactor Member

aka Dylan di Vilde

The new me

Imagine something clever here.

The new me

aka Dylan di Vilde

Imagine something clever here.

Scribe of the girls in the basement

Imagine something clever here.

Benefactor Member

aka Dylan di Vilde