"You should write more realistic stuff"

Cranky said:

Oh, dear. This thread makes me realize that I've been a horrible mom! I've been rather blatantly "encouraging" my son to read more fiction and to make up his own stories, because he's *very* into non-fiction. The only fiction he's really gotten into is The Diary of a Wimpy Kid books (which, not coincidentally, I think) are written in journal form, complete with sketches.

He watches documentaries of all kinds, reads encyclopedieas, etc. He writes what he calls 'research guides' -- non-fiction books about dinosaurs and other creatures, complete with really good (not just mom bragging) drawings of fully-fleshed dinosaurs, lizards, etc. and skeletons, and he includes everything he knows about them into each little book. I've been trying to coax him every now and again to make up stories about the dinosaurs (like he used to) instead. *smacks self*

If it's not okay to say someone should write "more realistic stuff", then surely the reverse is true, too. Ah, max, thanks for posting that -- you may have saved some little guy some angst over on this side of the world.

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That's one neat kid you've got there, even if he doesn't like fantasy

Rhys Cordelle said:

That's one neat kid you've got there, even if he doesn't like fantasy

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He even rocks a full on Mohawk. Yeah, he's a great kid, very unique and not afraid at all to be himself, even at ten. I can forgive him -- and besides, he *does* think dragons are cool. LOL!

Cranky said:

He even rocks a full on Mohawk. Yeah, he's a great kid, very unique and not afraid at all to be himself, even at ten. I can forgive him -- and besides, he *does* think dragons are cool. LOL!

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booyah! one point for me. i'm writing a dragon story now, ha! i like him already

Cranky said:

Oh, dear. This thread makes me realize that I've been a horrible mom! I've been rather blatantly "encouraging" my son to read more fiction and to make up his own stories, because he's *very* into non-fiction.

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Not to impugn you as a mother or a woman, but it could also be that your son's a bit like me. I don't like to be told what to do. I don't like to be told what to read. If you suggest that I read a particular book, I'll consider it. If you continue to suggest it, or start nagging me to read something, I'll refuse to read it altogether out of sheer defiance.

I never read a single book that was required of me in school until years after I had gotten out of school. Instead, I'd memorize the Cliff's Notes and bullshit my way through class.

Apologies for the derail, but I'll follow it a bit longer to answer you MGraybosch. I don't think you're impugning me at all, so no worries there.

He's definitely stubborn, but with him, it's more like he's humoring me, lol. He's into what he's into, and he'll try books because I suggest them (and I don't force him to buy or continue to read anything he's hating, for sure), but not very often of his own volition will he read fiction. It just doesn't ring his bell, that's all. He used to write stories, and enjoy it, and I guess I wanted to encourage that. I just was slow in realizing it's not really a big interest for him. I was a bit pushy about it because he's got a perfectionist streak a mile wide, and if he's not instantly good at something, he tends to lose interest quickly. There's a fine line between encouraging someone to keep trying -- to expand their horizons a bit, and being a nag. It's a bit blurry, but still recognizable. And I think, ultimately, so long as I stay on the right side of it, no harm done. I hope. LOL!

It makes me sad that people think it's okay to tell someone that they "ought" to write anything. I'm sad I may have done so myself, because it's NOT okay. People read and write the stories they enjoy, and who am I or anyone else to tell them that what they like isn't "realistic" (or "fantastic" heh) enough? So, Max, I hope you're busy writing the biggest, baddest fantasy epic you possibly can. Just because you can.

If you want everybody to admire you and pat you on the back from the get-go, writing is not the right gig.

Some of us are lucky to have parents who support us and are proud of what we do. Most of us are not that lucky. Trying to change their attitude is upsetting, often futile, and ultimately pointless.

The only person you need to please is yourself.

Your natural allies are other writers and readers of your genre. As sales start rolling in, the number of such allies will increase.

In time, your father may well change his tune. My own parents went from "don't ever dare publish this shameful crap again under OUR last name" (when I was a teen) to something completely different (now). At this point, their appreciation of my creative work is meaningless to me. I write for my audience. There are plenty of people who don't like it or don't get it. You have to do what you think is right, and learn to ignore the naysayers.

gray rose, you hit it on the button. though no one in my immediate family other than my little brother is actively supporting me, i continue to do it.(they're not jerks about it but they dont care either) i absolutely love to write. it's the only thing that i can do and feel confident at. my husband hates that i write and it's heartbreaking but he's never read a book in his life and i try to understand that. nevertheless, i will go forward in writing because i'd be horribly depressed if i didnt. i'm not writing for him or my family but for the people who DO encourage me and flip out when they get excited about something i wrote. (that feeling keeps me going lol) sure i'm not professional yet, but i'm growing in something and it's amazing to watch and experience. there will always be someone who doesnt like something. all you can say to them is BACK OFF. of course, in a nice way that wont get you spit in the face.

authorilinca said:

it's the only thing that i can do and feel confident at. my husband hates that i write and it's heartbreaking but he's never read a book in his life and i try to understand that.

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Wow. That's just saddening -- that you have a husband who's never read a book in his life, and that he hates something that you love to do.

well, it's hard for some people to understand it but he grew up in europe where fiction books were not exactly plentiful during the country's communism. he doesnt like it because he doesnt understand what the big deal about books is in the first place. he just sees a bunch of tweens going all ridiculously obsessed over books (*cough* twilight) and cant stand the thought of it anymore. before them, he was fine. but, hey, i dont understand the hoopla about soccer so we're balanced ha!
maybe i should rephrase that. i WAS heartbroken but not so much anymore since the World Cup.

I was talking to my oldest kidlet today and I thought of something.

Just out of curiosity, to all of you who have received comments like the one Max posted about, do those people watch TV/movies? I'm guessing they do. Do they watch exclusively news and documentaries? I'm guessing not. Reading fantasy stuff is just as valid as watching it, no? Somebody had to write that stuff.

I got a comment from someone once about fantasy....My answer?

'Yeah, because Pirates of the Caribbean was such a flop, and you didn't go to the cinema to watch all of them three times, right?'

'It's not fantasy'

'Exsqueeze me? Zombie pirates, a magic compass, cursed treasure? A goddess of the sea in the second and third ones? Davy Jones having an octopus for a head?'

Then they went away

ETA: oh look, top grossing films of all time. Bar Titanic, you have to get to, arguably, number 17 before it's not SFF.

that's exactly what i always tell people. someone had to write all the crap you see on tv, you know? only in books, it's not so crappy. the actors often butcher the characters. (*cough* twilight *cough*)

I'm still going to go with my reply:

AceTachyon said:

Or just laugh.

Laugh and laugh and laugh.

And when your laughter finally dies down and you wipe that little tear from the corner of your eye, you turn to that person and say, "What were we talking about?"

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