Guilt, Shame, Confusion- discussion

Nateskate · Aug 16, 2005

I'm not sure whether any people here want to chat about life story writing? But there are several types of life stories. The inspirational stories are about people who've done something or gone somewhere we'd all like to go. "My trip to Africa, and how I killed a thirty foot Cobra". Or else they are just funny or interesing, "An insider view of Hollywood...My life as a circus clown"

However, others have stories about "growth" and "survival", or coming to terms with a difficulty. I tend to see my life story in this class.

I for one don't relish talking about all of the aspects of my life. Some parts are embarrassing, but moreso, I've always felt that writing the relevent parts of my childhood would leave too many friends and relatives confused or wondering, and others wounded.

What are some of the barriers to writing your life story? Do you ever feel guilty, worried you'd hurt someone you care about by exposing their little secrets and how it wounded you? Do you worry about liable, that someone will sue you if you paint a less than steller picture of them?

Shwebb · Jan 13, 2006

I plan on writing something about my life someday, and if/when it's really good and/or publishable, I plan on doing something with it. It might hurt some people's feelings, I'll admit, but sometimes the truth is important for people to face, too.

I think my story would be marketable because some of the stuff I've witnessed or experienced is unique, but the themes are pretty universal.

Perhaps part of what drives me to write about these things is that I had people "change history" on me so many times, so I want the truth on paper. When I record a memory, I try to ensure its accuracy (unlike certain people *cough (James Frey)*) by running it by a few people who were there. I've been blessed/cursed w/ a great memory; I've rarely remembered wrong.

I'm not too worried about libel because

1. my brother is an attorney, and I would run the ms. by him first
2. I'd change enough information to preserve the anonymity of some people who's identity should remain secret.

Jimk · Jan 14, 2006

Nateskate said:
However, others have stories about "growth" and "survival", or coming to terms with a difficulty. I tend to see my life story in this class.

This is also what I have in mind, but not about an entire life, just a traumatic episode late in life.

Nateskate said:
I for one don't relish talking about all of the aspects of my life.

This is, of course, often a problem, in my case too. But I think you have to face the fact that however naive, stupid or trusting you may have been its a healing process to face that and also to understand that you did the best you could given what you knew then. For me that healing process is one of the benefits of writing the story.

Nateskate said:
What are some of the barriers to writing your life story? Do you worry about liable, that someone will sue you if you paint a less than steller picture of them?

As Shwebb says in previous post.

Marbleeyes · Jan 18, 2006

Shwebb said:
Perhaps part of what drives me to write about these things is that I had people "change history" on me so many times, so I want the truth on paper. When I record a memory, I try to ensure its accuracy (unlike certain people *cough (James Frey)*) by running it by a few people who were there. I've been blessed/cursed w/ a great memory; I've rarely remembered wrong.

.

I am writing mine for much of the same reasons, I have a lot of family members that have selective memories when it comes to some unhealthy behaviors or things that have happened where they don't come out smelling like roses.
For once and for all I want to write it all down. I also think that my story might inspire other people that have been in my shoes

Guilt, Shame, Confusion- discussion

Nateskate

Shwebb

She's the creepy-looking dude

Jimk

Marbleeyes