I'll fix those bastards!!!

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JERETHAL

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Hey,
I got a good idea for a screenplay today- right after I got one of those thanks, but no thanks, e-mauls today. I"m ripe for revenge. I'm hoping for inspirational
input here. I'm calling this story "Sell My Script's".

The logline would be something like this:

An outlaw biker is secretly an aspiring screenwriter. He gets revenge from the people who rejected reading his script.


Synopsis:

An oulaw biker writes a collection of scripts. He rides to California and tries to have them read so he can sell them. He can't even get a major studio to look at them. They get sent back unread. He is told that he has to get permission to send them. He tries to get permission to send them. He's rejected.
So he rounds up some unsavory characters named Pigman, Tiny, Skunk and Wild Bill to help him kidnap executives of major motion picture srudios.

Once they kidnap their studio exec's, the writer makes them sit down and read his scripts. They all love the scripts. That just makes the writer mad.

The writer tells the exec's he'll let them go if they can sell the scripts. If they can't, he'll kill them. They have 90 days. But he lays down some ground rules. The exec's have to pretend to be the writer, they can't make phone calls and their computer queries and letters are monitored by the writer to make sure they don't pull any sneaky stuff and cry for help. The exec's can't even get a agent to represent the scripts.

At the end of the 90 day's, the exec's still don't have an agent and they can't even get a studio to look at the script's. So the writer offers to let them go for a ransom. He collects 20 million dollars from each exec's estate for a total of one hundred million dollars.

The writer and his outlaw friends form a production company and make the movies themselves. The movies make 100's of millions of dollars.

At the end of the movie, The writer turned movie mogul is leaving his office when he is kidnapped by a disgruntled writer........................

Maybe i should call it " A VISCIOUS CIRCLE".

Any comments or suggestions? Here's your chance to fantacize a little bit and get even.
 

TheRuleofThirds

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JERETHAL said:
Maybe i should call it " A VISCIOUS CIRCLE".

You're kidding, right? The expression is "a vicious cycle," which fits perfectly with the guy being a biker.

It's a weird idea, actually. It looks like it's having an genre-identity crisis. It's not quite dark comedy, but it's not quite thriller. The first act sounds like a great comedy, but after that, the whole humor thing falls apart and turns serious. If the whole thing's serious, then the first act seems too extreme and novel to fit in a serious movie. Plus, you'd have a lot of people like me thinking, "Man...that'd make for a great first act in a dark comedy, but it's already been wasted recently on a thriller!" I guess there's always parody, but meh...

Either way, it needs work. I won't hog up all the critiquing, so umm...I'll let the other folks here explain what needs work.
 

StephieM

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It's sounds like it would be very funny. Just don't let your anger seep through the pages. :)

Steph
 

dpaterso

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pass

Nobody wants a script about a writer, even if he is a crazy biker who kidnaps and threatens people.

The idea is shaky. Why does he seek "success" as a writer when he can demand ransom money from the studios instead?

Alternative logline suggestion:

Studio execs are kidnapped by a crazy frustrated screenwriter who gives them 90 days to sell his crap scripts -- or die.

Which might tell you whose story I think this ought to be.

The expression is "a vicious circle"

-Derek
Derek's Web Page - stories, screenplays, novels, insanity.
 

JERETHAL

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I was actually just kidding. But I did spend some time thinking about trying to develope the idea. I was torn between a "misery" type script and something written with a Jim Carrey in mind. But I concluded I could do it as a comedy or a psycho thriller - so I invented a new genre : The Comedy Psychothriller. Too bad John Belushi died. The lead would call for a guy with a split personality. One minute he is funny, the next minute he's dangerous. The kidnapped execs don't know whether to laugh or cry.

But then again, maybe I just need therapy. If I could write something like that...........
 

scripter1

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My two cents.

Jer, I sense that you are feeling frustrated about your writing carreer. I don't know, just this "vibe" that I'm getting.

We care about you. We are willing to listen.
It's okay.
You are safe here.










Okay, now really.
I do like the title and it seems to fit in nicely with the biker dudes.
Would I love to see all the big wigs sweating it out trying to get sold and crashing up against the stone walls we writers face? Yeah, that would make me smile a bit. [I understand why the walls are there, but that is another topic]

I would say stick with kind of a dark comedy. Tone down the threats of death, cuz that's ... just...... well, it's wierd okay!

Someone out there could like this pitch and be willing to poke some fun at Hollywood. Honestly though, I think it will either be a totally love or totally hate kind of thing.
And don't be surprised if at some point some gentlemen with nice suits and dark shades come to your house to ask you a few simple questions.
 

TheRuleofThirds

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"Yeah, but Walter...they're gonna kill that poor girl unless we give them the money!"

"Where do you want us to go?"
"Us?"
"Uh, yeah, you know, me and the driver. I'm not handling the money and driving the car and talking on the phone all by my--"

Death threats aren't funny?
 

scripter1

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Not in THIS context.

When it happens in a make believe movie, in a make believe way, to make believe people, written by people who aren't disgruntled about the same thing as the protags, then that's different.
We know it's simply a story.

Just me personally, I find it really unnerving to entertain talk of taking another human's life.
 

Joe Calabrese

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I think if presented properly killing can work in a comedy.

Look at "Home Alone." It's pretty obvious Joe Pesci was gonna kill that little kid if he managed to get his hands on him, BUT it was never said or implied, just assumed based on character types and a few "I'm gonna get you kid." phrases.

As for writers in scripts, they are kinda taboo and almost never get sold-- especially by a newcomer. But if written well and freshly put, who knows.

Scorcese's King of Comedy was a great "kidnapping to get a head in an artistic career film." It was funny, creepy, had all the elemnts you want in your script.
 

Maryn

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Amen on King of Comedy, Joe. I describe it to people I wish would see it with the same words, 'funny' and 'creepy.'

Maryn, whose movie recommendations are largely ignored
 

WritingFool

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Sorry to admit, but I wouldnt spend 7.50 on smething like this. wouldnt even spend the 2.99 to rent it at blockbusters. Maybe would watch it on cable if I heard good things about it, and my wife really really hassled me to watch it.
sorry,but resembles get shorty too much, and who really wants to watch a movie about the movie making experience..granted Get shorty was done well,and The Big Picture was a cute little thing back in the day, but with so much other concepts out there, doubt it would be worth it...from my standpoint at least.
good luck with it though.
 

TheRuleofThirds

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WritingFool said:
Sorry to admit, but I wouldnt spend 7.50 on smething like this. wouldnt even spend the 2.99 to rent it at blockbusters. Maybe would watch it on cable if I heard good things about it, and my wife really really hassled me to watch it.
sorry,but resembles get shorty too much, and who really wants to watch a movie about the movie making experience..granted Get shorty was done well,and The Big Picture was a cute little thing back in the day, but with so much other concepts out there, doubt it would be worth it...from my standpoint at least.
good luck with it though.

What about Silent Movie?
 

Joe Calabrese

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Let me go into a tangent for a second, but it sorts of relates to this thread.

There is something I believe that a lot of writers fall into when they justify thier scripts using past examples.

Star Wars did this and Jaws did that-- People loved it then, why can't I do the same?

Although Hollywood loves familiarity with a concept, there needs to be something very fresh added to the mix to make it work.

Memento probably wouldn't have been made if not for the reverse storytelling. It was a "whodunnit" we've seen before but presented fresh-- unique.

Also, comparing to films from 10, 20, even 50 years ago means very little today. If Citizen kane was made today with the same script, I doub't it would fly, or be considered as a classic because people's tastes and attitudes change.

So, when comparing to older scripts don't go for specifics but the general that made it timeless.

For Star Wars, don't say "they had villians who wore black capes, so why can't I. Capes go in and out of fashion (no pun intended).

Instead look for the general time tested things that made it well loved-- even today, like: "A villian that is mysterious with a hidden agenda."
 

TheRuleofThirds

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Joe Calabrese said:
Instead look for the general time tested things that made it well loved-- even today, like: "A villian that is mysterious with a hidden agenda."

And a..."hidden fortress." :hi:
 
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