Scenes from a hat!

TurbulentMuse · Jan 20, 2021

1. Put a spoon full of peanut-butter in their mouth, that'll keep them quiet for a minute.

druid12000 · Jan 20, 2021

2. Yell 'Sale at _____!(insert current flavor of the month store)', and quickly move aside to avoid stampede.

TurbulentMuse · Jan 23, 2021

3. Ask to speak to their manager. Turn the tables.

druid12000 · Jan 23, 2021

4. Gaze deeply and longingly into their eyes and when the first pause in the rant occurs, say 'You have something in your teeth.'

NathanBrazil · Jun 17, 2021

5. Point her in the direction of the nearest White Sale.

Things you can say to your spoon but not your wife.

kinokonoronin · Jun 18, 2021

1. You sure can carry a lot of ice cream.

NathanBrazil · Jun 18, 2021

2. I can never get this caked on crap off of you.

Chris P · Jun 19, 2021

3. Oh, that's where you've been. How did you end up under the backseat floor mat?

NathanBrazil · Jun 20, 2021

4. Couldn't even get one fork. Guess I'm stuck with you.

M.S. Wiggins · Aug 4, 2021

5. Bouillon spoons are better.

Jokes better left unsaid.